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01-14-2005, 06:57 AM | #1 | |||||||||||||||
King's Writer
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
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Ruin of Doriath - The Shadow falls on Brethil
Since we did agree that WH will become the first part of RoD, I will with this thread provide a place for to discuss the changes that this texts needs. The discussion should not begin immediatly since we are still involved in "Ruin of Doriath - Final Part" but it might be good to have the changes out here to muse about them for some time.
First this part of the story brings up some further general changes. I will take up the list with RD-37 since that does occour often in this part: RD-37 Avranc to Daruin per WH Note 55 RD-38 Gelion to Duin Daer RD-39 Dorlas to Darlas per WH Note 55 RD-40 Angbor to Halabor per WH Note55 RD-41 Halad to Halbar per WH Note 55 RD-42 Dorlómin to Dor-lómin if we whish for consistency we should make a change but I could not find any reason to force one or the other spelling. Thus I took Dor-lómin since it is more often used in Tolkiens writings. There are no changes in this part to adjust the storyline (RD-SL-zz) and to call the changes in this RD-EX-zz would not fit the charchter of the changes and it would bring in some higher nummbers before the lower once. Thus I will lable all changes in this section RD-WH-zz. I will not give the full text here, but any change introduced will be given. I have numbered the § of the text from §1 So ended the tale of Túrin the Hapless, ... to §266 But Húrin stood silent, ... and will reffer to them by giving the number and the first words (as above) and if some changes are done behind a particular § the last words. Any passage need to make the suggested change clear is given. Some conventions of my writing: Normal Text is from the basic text that is mentioned above (when I change the basic-Text it will be mentioned) Bold Text = source information, comments and remarks { } = text that should be deleted [ ] = normalised text <source > = additions with source information example = text inserted for grammatical reason / / = outline expansion Normally if an inserted text includes the beginning of a new § these is indicated by a missing “>” at the end of the § and a missing “<” at the beginning of the next. The basic Text is that ot The Wanderings of Húrin in the later version. The double crosses (**) that indicat the places where the earlier version differs and the inserted comentray are taken out without indication. Now to the changes: RD-WH-01: This is based on Note 57 to WH: Quote:
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RD-WH-02 incooperating the text from the continuation of The Grey Annals: Quote:
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That's all I could find in these part of the text that needed a change. All changes are open for discussions and please comment on any needed change I have missed. Respectfully Findegil |
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02-01-2005, 11:04 AM | #2 | |
Late Istar
Join Date: Mar 2001
Posts: 2,224
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RD-WH-08
Quote:
RD-WH-09-13 If we replace every instance of Stone or Standing Stone with Talbor, then we never tell the reader what the Talbor is. Or will we perhaps name it that when it is erected at the end of the Narn? |
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02-02-2005, 03:37 AM | #3 |
King's Writer
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
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RD-WH-08:
I did also understand the doubt about the inclusion of the passage and I agree that since it is not strucout we should retain it. But would I thought that the parenthes were in order to represent some of what underlies. Do you think we should include it with out the parenthes? RD-WH-09 - RD-WH-13: Yes, I think that naming the Sstone Talbor when it is erected at the end of the Narn is what is suggested in the notes to WH. Respectfully Findegil |
02-11-2005, 10:33 PM | #4 |
The Kinslayer
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I have looked at the changes, and I'm ok with them. I don't see anything out of the ordinary.
__________________
"Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio; a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy." |
02-12-2005, 01:08 PM | #5 |
King's Writer
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 1,694
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So Of the Ruin of Doriath seems done for the moment. I will produce a text with all the updated changes for the privat forum.
If nobody speaks up against it it will be a single text; not divided in the parts we took for the discussion. Respectfully Findegil |
02-13-2005, 10:54 PM | #6 | |
The Kinslayer
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I saw our final product Of the Ruin of Doriath and I have to congratulate you Findegil. I only noticed small things like there was no dieresis in Manwe.
Also this: Quote:
__________________
"Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio; a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy." |
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