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Old 05-08-2005, 07:40 PM   #1
littlemanpoet
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What do you "assign" to the Shire?

I feel we could stand to balance the negative
of Mordorian assignments with something more positive.
The contrast to Mordor
is not Valinor,
which is beyond the girth
of Middle Earth.
It's the Shire.
So in case you tire
of assigning from your ire
to Mordor, you might desire
to give some thought
to what you're quite sure ought
to be in the idyllic Shire.

I'll start.

Groves of tall trees never to be cut down.

Neighborhoods in which people passing by greet each other as a matter of course.
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Old 05-08-2005, 09:18 PM   #2
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People who are willing to help for no public recognition or money
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Old 05-09-2005, 07:20 AM   #3
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All my lady-friends from the downs of course...
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Old 05-09-2005, 07:54 AM   #4
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1420!

Cold, malty ales freshly hand pulled from oak barrels, served in heavy glass tankards?

Vast trenchers brimming with succulent roast beef, strong cheeses and fresh crusty bread?

Large chocolate cakes with chunks of fudge and with rich, foaming cream just falling out from the centres?

And then a nice soft lawn under a shady tree, beside a babbling brook, the perfect place to sleep it all off?
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Old 05-09-2005, 09:22 AM   #5
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Hobbits, of course.
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Old 05-09-2005, 11:24 AM   #6
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Dry cider and soft red wines.

Welsh butter.


Homemade marmalade - not too sweet.

Toad in the hole

Treacle pudding

(Well I think they would like a lot of food..)

Tabby & tortoiseshell cats -if the fine breeds are destined for Mordor let the Shire have down to earth moggies.

Larkspur and bluebells cornflowers and poppies - typical country garden and woodland/meadow flowers. The sort you usually can't buy.

Down duvets and pillows

Huge, squishy sofas and sheepskin cushions.

"Traditional Afternoon" tea

"The Archers" and Radio 4

I am going to stop now since I can hear the Elgar Cello Concerto playing.......
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Old 09-01-2005, 02:26 AM   #7
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Silmaril [rant]

Is it just me, or did anybody else wonder why a lot more are being sent to Mordor than to the Shire? Is the world generally filled with things that belong to Mordor?

I admit to being quite an active poster in the "What do you assign to Mordor?" thread. Every simple annoying thing in my life I send to Mordor, when I find the time. But the other day, while I was contemplating whether or not to send a certain very Mordor-worthy something to the Black Land, a thought came to me so hard I could have touched it. ( ) Isn't there something in bad things that could make them more appropriately sent to the Shire instead?

Just a thought.

[/rant]

Now that I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, I'd like to send parents and their children to the Shire. Perhaps the serene environment will give them the opportunity to understand each other.

Or maybe just Fea and Sauce.
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Old 09-01-2005, 03:26 AM   #8
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1420! Doing my best to accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative...

I assign penny whistles, cookies, lemonade, long conversations, ginger ale, unconditional love, summer, hand-knitted scarves, swings, long skirts, and apple-picking to the Shire.
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Old 09-01-2005, 06:44 AM   #9
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In answer to Lhuna's rant, maybe it's just easier to think of things that are bad in your life because you take those that are good for granted.

So to the Shire I assign everything I take for granted.
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Old 09-02-2005, 10:52 AM   #10
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It's hot here, so hot... two or three weeks around and above 100F...

I assign to the Shire...

Open windows, curtained with white muslin blowing in the cool breeze
Breezeways every which way through the house
Breezes that are cool
Air that is pleasantly warm and no more
Sunlight that's warm and gentle
A sun that is cheery and yellow
Blue, blue skies
Puffy white clouds
Big tall white and gray and blue clouds (not green) that shimmer with lightning, pour out rain on the grass and garden, toss the leaves and branches with fine, stiff gusts, and move off into the cool evening
Dark, cloudy days in season, with stiff, nippy winds and warm, bright clothes to bundle in
A good fire inside when the day is cold outside
Birds that sing and play in the birdbath all day long, even in the afternoon
Tall, tall trees that aren't necessarily pines
Spreading pecan trees with branches drooping to touch the ground, laden with big fat green pecans
Chasing squirrels away from said pecans
Canoeing up down the river/creek, unmolested by heat or bugs or other wildlife
Large families with cousins and uncles and aunts and neighbors, all dropping in to work and play any time in the day
Singing simply for the joy of it, and the fun of playing with harmony
Singing and talking while working with one's hands - companionship in labor
Roses that bloom all spring, summer, fall, and into winter
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Old 09-02-2005, 11:27 AM   #11
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I assign starry nights to the Shire, and rainbows, and winter evenings when everything is silent and the snow glitters on the ground. I also send my dog there and all other furry creatures.
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Old 09-05-2005, 06:45 AM   #12
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Still, cool mornings, when the sun is just peaking over the horizon and the birds are singing and the sky is blue, and you feel like you're the only person awake in the world.
The same when you're with your dog.
Beautiful autumn colors and fall leaves. Sugar maples.
Long walks under the same.
The month of October.
Beautiful blue skies... especially in October.
Running barefoot over cool grass, especially in the early morning or under the stars.
Still mountain lakes.
Hiking trails and pine trees and clear, pine-scented air.
Rock climbing in the Black Hills with my cousins.
Mountains...
Forests.
Eagles, horses, dolphins, wolves, cheetahs, and all other manner of magnificent and beautiful creatures.
Sitting out on the front step and watching thunderstorms.
The type of rainstorms that roll in and roll out just that fast and leave the world fresh and new.
Log houses.
Good books.
Good puzzles.
Time to enjoy said books and puzzles.
Peace and contentment.
Faith, hope, and love.
Beauty and wonder.
Singing just for the joy of it.

Everyone should have to do this once in a while... it's very much a healthy relaxant.
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Old 09-05-2005, 03:36 PM   #13
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I know this was mentioned before but... BOOKS!!!! LOTS AND LOTS OF BOOKS !!!!!!!
Plus a nice big lake which is perfect for canoeing and swimming.
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Old 09-05-2005, 04:00 PM   #14
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Waltzes
Small children
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Old 09-05-2005, 07:05 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Oro
Small children
Um...how about small napping children?

Yeah, sleeping babies should go to the Shire. Not just because they can be loud when they're awake, but because they're so sweet looking.
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Old 09-11-2005, 12:39 PM   #16
Hilde Bracegirdle
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Long talks with old friends that go late into the night, so that you quitely watch the sunrise before going off to bed, (and wakeup a few hours later to start the day in earnest).
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Old 09-11-2005, 10:39 PM   #17
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caramelled granny smith apples!
Horse riding!
________
Uggs

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Old 09-12-2005, 05:22 PM   #18
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Afternoon naps.
Celtic knots.
When your mom finds the penny whistle you lost and have been looking for for several weeks.
Thinking about the fun you'll have playing the new music you got on your violin once it's done being fixed. (Oh please oh please oh please let the repair guy call tonight and say he's finished!)
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Old 09-12-2005, 05:28 PM   #19
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Any kind of fiddley type music.
Music in general.
Playing my clarinet. (CLARINET'S ROCK!!!!)
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Old 10-23-2005, 11:35 PM   #20
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Artistic inspiration. When you've got an idea, and you just can't wait to begin. When it's killing you that your glue gun is at home and you haven't got any aluminium foil, but that it's okay, because you've got all of Thanksgiving break to do it. When you can't wait to raid the scrap bins for fabric to sew a bag that is taking shape before your eyes. When you can't help but giggle at the prospect of actually incorporating "meaning" into a project, instead of concentrating solely on asthetic appeal, and knowing that you know exactly what you're doing, and how you're doing it. The sudden spark that ignites your entire outlook into a sudden inferno of excitement... that rush belongs in paradise.

Also, hours-long talks with old friends. When you've been out of touch for far longer than you'd have ever liked, but you suddenly discover a simultaneous break in your equally busy lives that allows you to simply sit and catch up. When the speed of your typing correlates directly to the size of the smile on your face, which keeps getting bigger as you realize just how much you missed gushing about the wonderful things and pouring your heart out about the hard to the most trusted guy in your life...

And the kind of memories that bring a goofy smile to your face that when you're called on, make you blush. I like the Shire. These happy thoughts are brightening my outlook even as I write.
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Old 11-17-2005, 05:09 AM   #21
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Wow, a lot of you have described Exmoor, where I live. For those of you who aren't from the UK, it's a small protected National Park and AONB (Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty) in the SW of England.

I reckon Jackson could have filmed the Shire scenes here. We have beautiful scenery, green rolling hills, moorland covered in heather, and we have real honest-to-goodness barrows here too. I walk my dogs past a series of these burial sites nearly every day. I always imagine the creeping hand under the soil guarding hoards of treasure.

Exmoor is full of tiny communities, like the shire. Exmoor even has Shire-ish sounding villages and places: Wootton Courtenay, West Buckland, Withiel Florey, Aldermans Barrow, Elworthy Barrow... I could go on and on.

The pace of life is so gentle here. It's full of old farmhouses, old fashioned people, tiny village shops. Little bakeries full of cakes, pastries, good breads. Butchers shops selling locally produced meats. Cosy little pubs with open fires selling ales by the pint. It's as close to the Shire as you're ever gonna get. I sometimes wonder if Tolkien ever visited here, the way he describes the Shire is pure Exmoor through and through.
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Old 11-17-2005, 09:59 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Melilot Brandybuck
Wow, a lot of you have described Exmoor, where I live. For those of you who aren't from the UK, it's a small protected National Park and AONB (Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty) in the SW of England.
Welcome to the Downs, Melilot!

I was to England this September past, but only got as close to Exmoor as Bath. More's the pity. I wanted to get to Glastonbury, but one can only do so much in three weeks. Maybe next time.
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Old 11-18-2005, 05:06 AM   #23
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Thanks for the warm welcome Littlemanpoet.

Ah, shame you couldn't make it as far as Exmoor. It is so lovely here.

Bath is a great place to visit, with its unique Georgian architecture and history - I esp. like to visit the Roman baths. Glastonbury is OK, very crowded in the summer months and to be honest I have never sensed any mysticism or spirituality. Maybe all the crowds soak it up and there isn't enough to go around...

Exmoor's great if you love hiking or riding and you want to see the English countryside with a sense of an age gone by. Not so good if you're looking for clubs, dancing or night life. But if you're looking for history, Iron Age remains, old druid's groves, wild deer, soaring hawks, heather-clad moorland, ancient woodland, medieval churches, thatched farmhouses, then it's really worth a visit.
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Old 12-27-2005, 07:02 PM   #24
Amanaduial the archer
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Silmaril

People are just alot better at moaning maybe. Why else has the News, a whole programme devoted mainly to bad news, has lasted so long?

Quote:
I am going to stop now since I can hear the Elgar Cello Concerto playing.......
As a cellist, I must here interrupt you, Mithalwen - you every tried playing that?! 'Tis pain to the fingers, nay, to the whole arm! Lol, however, Elgar would certainly be there - some of his short pieces such as 'Serenade' and 'The Shower', as well, of course, as a few of the Nimrod variations: may I suggest Nimrod, written as it was as a tribute to a loyal, lasting friend, (Jager, Elgar's published) and therefore very suitable to the little folk of the Shire and the stoicism and loyalty they are so marked for; Romanza, for the more amourous of tweenies - an ode to the courtship of Rosie and Sam maybe!; and maybe the 11th variation, 'G.R.S', for it's mischief, so portrayed in characters such as Merry and Pippin.

Yeah, I like Elgar.
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Old 12-28-2005, 11:56 AM   #25
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Alas I am not so gifted ... if time and motivation allows one day I would love to learn (I did violin but apparently I am temperamentally more suited to the cello ) - and people always assume I can play because of a passing resemblance (when a little younger) to a young Jacqueline du Pre .....
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Old 12-28-2005, 12:08 PM   #26
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Silmaril

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mithalwen
Alas I am not so gifted ... if time and motivation allows one day I would love to learn (I did violin but apparently I am temperamentally more suited to the cello ) - and people always assume I can play because of a passing resemblance (when a little younger) to a young Jacqueline du Pre .....
Lol, what an assumption! I have several recordings of her playing on my computer actually - actually, if you watch my sister and I while listening to the faster passages, you may witness an incredible phenomenum...as we actually turn a mild shade of green with envy!

I also assign raspberry jam. Terribly important to get your toast just right.
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Old 12-28-2005, 12:13 PM   #27
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Well yes but strangely true..... just shows how appearance can be deceptive... but The Barbirolli version goes to the Shire even though it will remind me of sitting on the music room steps and crying my heart out the day she died. to keep it company I will send Yo-Yo Ma's Vivaldi disc...
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Old 12-31-2005, 10:52 PM   #28
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[QUOTE=Lhunardawen]Is it just me, or did anybody else wonder why a lot more are being sent to Mordor than to the Shire? Is the world generally filled with things that belong to Mordor?

But the other day, while I was contemplating whether or not to send a certain very Mordor-worthy something to the Black Land, a thought came to me so hard I could have touched it. ( ) [I]Isn't there something in bad things that could make them more appropriately sent to the Shire instead?



Yeah. Gossip. Pettiness. Nosy neighbours - you'd never get THOSE in Mordor! Well, maybe you would - those orcs sure gossip about each other...

Heavy English food, all that fried bacon to start with - erk! On the other hand, if I have to eat bad-for-you food, Sam Gamgee's fish and chips ... mmm
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Old 01-01-2006, 02:05 PM   #29
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Good point.

[rant]
To the Shire then:

Provincialism.

Being so small minded you care more about your son's weskit missing than any world saving he might have helped accomplish.

Being more proud of the brash and brave looking young warriors than the one who did all he could and lost almost everything to save the Shire for everyone else.

That stuff all belongs in the Shire. And there's more of it, not even found in LotR.

Like caring more about music style than the message behind the music.
[/end rant]
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Old 01-01-2006, 07:33 PM   #30
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Silmaril

All those beautiful, relatively quiet HIs...I mean fireworks I saw yesterday. The noisy ones are a different story.

And having January 1 a second longer due to some adjustments concerning the earth's rotation. Not much, but it's still a second.

Finally, having classes the day right after New Year's Day! Don't ask.

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Old 01-03-2006, 07:18 AM   #31
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Silmaril

Weird stares, especially those that come while you cross the street or walk through a mall while making chicken sounds.

Right, Nilp?

Professors who continually enjoy their holiday breaks when school is supposed to resume on January 2.

Friends you've known for merely months who ambush you the day before your birthday. I was busy celebrating a friend's birthday a while ago (after partly successfully surprising her) when another came up to me and asked me to accompany her somewhere. I ended up being surprised myself as well, although it was rather advanced, but I have no problem with that.

And no classes on the day of your birthday. It protects you from further surprises.

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Old 02-10-2006, 08:19 AM   #32
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I assign Progressive Metal to the Shire.
THANK YOU.
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Old 02-10-2006, 12:25 PM   #33
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While I love metal, the image of little hobbits moshing to Iron Maiden does seem a little... odd.
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Old 02-10-2006, 01:41 PM   #34
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Iron Maiden?

Progressive?

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Old 02-10-2006, 01:42 PM   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by the guy who be short
While I love metal, the image of little hobbits moshing to Iron Maiden does seem a little... odd.
Can't beat a bit of moshing. I've just spent half an hour doing it in the living room - it's my alternative aerobic routine. Rargh!

Or does Enedhilion mean things like Yes or early Genesis? I defy anyone to mosh to The Battle of Epping Forest. Or am I just showing my age?
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Old 02-10-2006, 03:02 PM   #36
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While I don't dislike Iron Maiden, I prefer the thought of hobbits jamming to Metallica's Master of Puppets album... Ride the Lightening works also. Surely a bit of hobbitish playing of the air guitar to chase off the stress of a long day?

And I must assign to the Shire the song La Tortura by Shakira. You can't listen to it without wanting to dance.

And dancing must certainly have been assigned already. Ballroom, ballet, belly dancing... All fun in their own way.

I assign learning to waltz with your grandfather, who just happens to be the coolest guy ever. I assign the limberness after a long ballet warmup. I assign everything about belly dancing, because there's nothing quite like the looks on people's faces when they catch you laundry-room-dancing.

And about that, I assign laundry-room-dancing. When the lounge is full and the common room is taken and there's just not enough room in dorm-room or hall to move, and you take an old-school boombox to the laundry room for a bit of jiving... that's a blast, I promise. All should try it.
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Old 02-11-2006, 12:21 PM   #37
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LalwendŽ
Yes or early Genesis? I defy anyone to mosh to The Battle of Epping Forest. Or am I just showing my age?
Oh migaw! Don't worry, it's a good age.

I assign to the Shire everything Genesis did between 1970 and 1976; except for Lamb Lies Down on Broadway, which belongs in the realm of the University Hospital of Mordor at Urukapolis (keywords: Sigmund, Jung, psych eval).
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Old 02-15-2006, 04:14 AM   #38
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White-Hand Shameless slug's plug:

Quote:
While I love metal, the image of little hobbits moshing to Iron Maiden does seem a little... odd. (daga'y who be wolf )

Rock 'n Roll Ain't Shire Pollution!
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Old 02-15-2006, 02:22 PM   #39
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Oh, and clean teeth, even if it does riquire a visit to the dentist... (clean teeth)
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Old 02-11-2006, 01:09 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Enedhilion
I assign Progressive Metal to the Shire.
THANK YOU.
[insidejoke] I assign studying history to the shire, endhelion.[/insidejoke]


I have always thought of anything of bounty belonging to the shire. Everything is large, the parties, the food, the egos.(Well...except for the hobbits, lol.)
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