Inktomi Slurp Spider?

[symestreem]

:eek: The index currently lists 129 people on the board, with 68 viewing the Books. Further investigation reveals that most of these are Inktomi Slurp Spiders. A Google search turns up the information that when Yahoo! bought Inktomi, it took the Slurp Spiders out of commission and renamed them Yahoo! Spiders. Is the board being haunted?

[Kuruharan]

Seems likely enough.

Stay on the green threads. Don't you go a-meddling with old programs or cold Spiders who go prying through other people's forums.

[InklingElf]

what IS a slurp spider exactly?

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

what IS a slurp spider exactly? (InklingElf)
A spider is the program search engines use to update their database of pages. Or maybe it's the program they send out when someone's using their seach engine to access the page. I'm not sure.

A slurp spider is a spider found at your local 7-11. :)

[InklingElf]

A spider is the program search engines use to update their database of pages. Or maybe it's the program they send out when someone's using their seach engine to access the page. I'm not sure.

A slurp spider is a spider found at your local 7-11. :)

YUM!

Thanks for that info -- now all I have to do is figure out which one is which...

And I think I'll get some of that slurp spiders :D

[Child of the 7th Age]

The spiders have returned in even greater numbers! Where is Sam Gamgee when we need him? But , then, why should I be surprised? This is a Tolkien site!

As of 4:30 pm there were 185 Inktomi Slurp spiders swarming over the Barrowdowns. When I checked, they seemed particularly interested in the Shire discussion threads, for what reason I can not possibly imagine.....

[The Perky Ent]

Perhaps there were Inktomi Slurp Spider's that escaped the fate of their brethern? Maybe they weren't all deleted, and they ran for cover here in the downs! We're being invaded! Spiders! They're everywhere! There's only one thing to do: "Aiya Earendil Elendion Anacalima!"

[Kuruharan]

Hmm, I could foresee a very silly RPG involving chasing strange slurping spiders out of said Shire....

[InklingElf]

*slurp* indeed -- that reminds me of those chocolate spiders in Dreyers ice-cream...that was a few years ago. uuuugggghhhhh.

Now I know what those spider things are I should have paid more attention to that 'What's Going On' link. heh.

[The Saucepan Man]

I was just checking Whose Online (me, stalking? never) and noticed that the action given for one of those Inktomi Slurp Spiders was:


Sending Thread to a FriendSpiders have friends? They send Chapter-by Chapter discussion threads to them? Who are these friends? Where are they? Why are they doing it? I think that we should be told.

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

I'm afraid that the invasion of the Downs by a swarm of spiders might be my fault. . .

They've come in search of their friends (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showpost.php?p=335426&postcount=68)!

(Shameless self-promotion? Me? ME? Not possible, not possible. . .

. . .well. . .

. . .maybe a little possible.)

[Rimbaud]

11 members and 9 guests
Most users ever online was 243, 10-09-2004 at 10:53 AM.

Last Activity--------User Name--------------------Location

04:37 PM--------Inktomi Slurp Spider--------Giving Reputation

So now we know. Little blighters.

[Mister Underhill]

By far the most amazing thing about your post, Rimb, is something I haven't noticed until now -- 243 users online on 10/9?!!! A sac of spider eggs must have burst open on that day.

*shiver*

[Rimbaud]

Part of the reason I posted that line as well, Unde - wondered if anyone else wondered at it, so to speak. I rarely see more than twenty names on the site, and certainly nowhere near three figures, spiders or no.

[Fordim Hedgethistle]

Part of the reason I posted that line as well, Unde - wondered if anyone else wondered at it, so to speak. I rarely see more than twenty names on the site, and certainly nowhere near three figures, spiders or no.

I remember that day quite well. I was up (very early) with my son and I went online to see what was happening, and there was indeed quite a swarm of the little blighters (as you so eloquently put it)! I was postively afraid for the Downs!

[Bêthberry]

posted by Rimbaud:
04:37 PM--------Inktomi Slurp Spider--------Giving Reputation

Ah, but I thought one had to be registered in order to give Reputation! Or do we have a member called Inktomi Slurp Spider? :D

[Lalwendë]

Perhaps the 'Downs ought to adopt a Forum cat, who will be sure to make short work of any spiders. He might bring some headless mice in though.

[mark12_30]

On the other hand: the higher the spider population, the lower the mosquito population. Used to keep a web or three in the room up at camp, and slept better without the mosquito's background music.

Then again, there was that one time I woke to the sound of scratchy little footsteps; to find a Shelob marching down the ancient green canvas windowshade towards my pillow. She had to be a bloated grey inch across, just on her body. Scared the sleep right outa me, and I boxed her up and took her outside...

[Maeggaladiel]

This must be the spiders' favorite WEBsite! HAHAHAHAHAAAA! Get it? WEB-site? WEB... *looks around.* I'll shut up now.

[mark12_30]

Tis now the very witching time of night, When churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out hordes of Inktomi Slurp Spiders. They're back. Sam! Sam! Where's that glass??

[Child of the 7th Age]

How very strange! It's Christmas morning, at least in the U.S., and according to "who's online" we have 70 guests viewing the site (and only two spiders).

The only thing I can think of is that all those slurp spiders are miraculously transformed into actual humans on this one day of the year.....

In any case, welcome to our 70 guests and may you have a fine holiday. Just don't start spinning webs!

[mark12_30]

Where have all the spiders gone, Long time passing
Where have all the spiders gone, long time ago
Where have all the spiders gone
Labeled as Guest, every one (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/online.php?)
When will they ever learn
When will they ever learn

[Inktomi Slurp Spider]

Here's something to think about...

Seriously though, we're all doing our very best to keep the Barrowdowns in an excellent condition.

I will be happy to answer any questions you may have for us.

[Encaitare]

IT'S ALIVE!!!!!!! :eek:

[mark12_30]

**pokes Inktomi Slurp Spider**

Under the red and blue mask, I bet we find a mod...

[Kuruharan]

Hmmm...

In the profile, under occupation it says, "Holding the site together."

That couldn't possibly mean that even our fearless leader would engage in such tom-foolery his ownself...

...could it?

(Then again, it might have been the elusive and ever mischievous Underhill...
but, then again, that spider seems to be wearing a tiara...
but, then again, it seems rather...gray...
is that a saucepan I see in the web...)

[mark12_30]

Ah! There they are. Perhaps they are nocturnal after all.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

The Spiders (http://csd.ehu.by/projects/ehu215/la/)

Basically, these spiders are happy little creations that crawl around webpages to help build search engines. When our own resident Inky said they're doing their best to keep the 'Downs in great shape, he's kind of right. With The Barrowdowns being found through more search engines, more people will be on here, and so by default, more people will be donating money. :)

Here's a question, Inky... what's your real identity? ;)

Fea

[Inktomi Slurp Spider]

I'll leave you to keep guessing.

*Ahem!*

I mean, how dare you dispute my spidery ways! Keep this up and I will dabble with your posts, young lady.

[Elrian]

:eek: I see you've invited your cousin's the MSNbot and askjeeves spiders to join you! WE'RE BEING INVADED, we'll have to get all the Gamgee's for this invasion. :smokin: :eek:

[Mithalwen]

Hmmm...

In the profile, under occupation it says, "Holding the site together."

That couldn't possibly mean that even our fearless leader would engage in such tom-foolery his ownself...

...could it?

(Then again, it might have been the elusive and ever mischievous Underhill...
but, then again, that spider seems to be wearing a tiara...
but, then again, it seems rather...gray...
is that a saucepan I see in the web...)


I note it posts at what would be "just finished work time for a Brit" or "lunchtime for East Coast America /Canada" which may be a clue. And I think I would guess a Brit..... But I think it is possible to analyse writing (and I mean content not handwriting) to ID wok. But I doubt we have enough to go on yet.

[Eruanna]

More spiders?
Most users ever...yesterday, 335!
Now there are Google Spiders and the very alliterative Speedy Spider Spider.
I never kill spiders, I just transfer them to my garden. However, I don't think I could cope with 335 all at once. ;)

[Encaitare]

I note it posts at what would be "just finished work time for a Brit" or "lunchtime for East Coast America /Canada" which may be a clue. And I think I would guess a Brit..... But I think it is possible to analyse writing (and I mean content not handwriting) to ID wok. But I doubt we have enough to go on yet. (Mith)

Ooh, it's a mystery! *dons Sherlock Holmes hat*

Should be interesting to see if we can figure it out... any computer-savvy members know how to find a user's IP address? :p

[Kuruharan]

And I think I would guess a Brit

Well, that would narrow the field of potential candidates...considerably.

As far as I know there is only one Brit moderator.

However, there are two in Germany, which is not so very far off on time that it would be impossible for a small piece of evening mischief.

There is one mod that I know for certain who lives on the east coast of the US. He can occasionally be a bit...rascally.

However, going by your theory, that would eliminate the mod that I thought was doing it because I think he lives in entirely the wrong place.

[mark12_30]

Floridian Spirit of Mist? Hmmm, Inktomi Mithslurp...

[Rimbaud]

I think it's fairly evident.

[mark12_30]

My first guess would have been the Wight, considering the rapidity of the pounce. But then, there's more playfulness in the Spider than I would expect.

[Bêthberry]

Well, that would narrow the field of potential candidates...considerably.

As far as I know there is only one Brit moderator.

However, there are two in Germany, which is not so very far off on time that it would be impossible for a small piece of evening mischief.

There is one mod that I know for certain who lives on the east coast of the US. He can occasionally be a bit...rascally.

However, going by your theory, that would eliminate the mod that I thought was doing it because I think he lives in entirely the wrong place.

Actually, there are two Brit moderators, Kuru as well as the two in Germany. Two admins on the East Coast and a mod. An Admin and mod in Texas. One Mod on the West Coast and one Admin. One mod in North North America. But let us not be too hasty. I can think of others, though, who aren't officially mods, who are well known for their playfullness and who have done their share of 'keeping the forum together'.

Helen, do frogs pounce as lightly and easily as spiders?

ISP might give us some idea, but only mods have access to that, and only in their own forum. We all know who mods this forum.

[Lhunardawen]

Oh, thank you very much. Now I've got arachnophobia to deal with. As if having fear of stalkers is not enough.

[mark12_30]

Actually, there are two Brit moderators, Kuru as well as the two in Germany. Two admins on the East Coast and a mod. An Admin and mod in Texas. One Mod on the West Coast and one Admin. One mod in North North America. But let us not be too hasty. I can think of others, though, who aren't officially mods, who are well known for their playfullness and who have done their share of 'keeping the forum together'.

Helen, do frogs pounce as lightly and easily as spiders?



Bb, to the best of my admittedly limited understanding, frogs are known less for their pouncing than for their lightning-fast tongue.

Thank you for the most excellent rundown of mods, admins, and their locale. I shall have to bookmark your post for future reference.

[Lhunardawen]

Inktomi Slurp Spider, why did you choose to become an official member of the Downs among all the merely visiting Inktomi Slurp Spiders? Are you their official spokesperson sent to make your species' intentions clarified?

[Kuruharan]

Well, learn something new everyday.

(I at first thought the Wight was doing it, but now I'm not so sure. But, then again, who else could authorize this egregious waste of bandwidth?

However, Bethberry seems to know a lot.)

EDIT: Duh! I went and forgot Rimbaud was a mod! *smacks self in head*

[Mithalwen]

Well if Incey-wincey posts again we may see how he/she spells.... but although I said Brit.. if I didn't know he has limited net access for a few days I would guess Fordim .. the spider has a professorial tone me thinks and doc Hedgethistle has moments os out Briting the Brits.... :p

[Mithalwen]

Well if Incey-wincey posts again we may see how he/she spells.... but although I said Brit.. if I didn't know he has limited net access for a few days I would guess Fordim .. the spider has a professorial tone me thinks and doc Hedgethistle has moments of out Briting the Brits.... :p

[Bêthberry]

Hmm, Mithalwen for your reasoning. We follow Brit spelling up here. Except for tyre, so I suspect we shall need more linguistic clues than that.

Helen, alas for the future applicability of my post. We've already seen one Mod move 'cross the pond and rumour has it that others, nay, even Admins, are contemplating long distance moves.

I hate to think though that I gave anyone this idea. *shudders at one of my previous posts*


Quote:
posted by Rimbaud:
04:37 PM--------Inktomi Slurp Spider--------Giving Reputation


Ah, but I thought one had to be registered in order to give Reputation! Or do we have a member called Inktomi Slurp Spider?

[Mithalwen]

Sorry BB I was being characteristically opaque. My Brit hunch was based on instinct rather than spelling, I was faily certain that Canadians use British spelling (although my Canadian friends and family are either first generation immigrants or francophone so I wasn't sure), so that in itself would not eliminate FH ..... or indeed yourself :D ..it was just a possible clue ... but such are the linguistic skills of so many downers that I am sure that they could cover their tracks ....

Other possibility is that the Roggie of Morgoth has mutated .....

[Inktomi Slurp Spider]

I am slightly confused. As far as I can see, the spiders should be completely hidden. When I log on to this account I cannot see the other spiders. Where are you all seeing them?

As to your detective work, you need to sharpen up. The clues are subtle, verily.

This is a fun game, isn't it?

[mark12_30]

The usual, Who's Online. (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/online.php?)

Does this mean I have mod-vision? ( Woot! )

Look, there they are right now!

[mark12_30]

Other possibility is that the Roggie of Morgoth has mutated .....

Definitely not Roggie. Not enough swooning going on.

[Kuruharan]

Definitely not Roggie.

Well, I guess you would know.

By the way Mr./Mrs. Sloppy Arachnid, if we were to guess correctly, would you admit your identity or would you just go off into the Blue (or close the thread)?

[mark12_30]

Actually, Inktomi ModSlurp, I wonder if it's a question of firewall. My original protest-filk was posted from behind a commercial firewall; the rest have been from home, behind a home firewall (albeit a well-maintained one.)

(EDIT) Orrrrrr..... maybe it's static IP versus dynamic IP? You could use your modMagic to check on that.

[Evisse the Blue]

07:53 AM Inktomi Slurp Spider Registering

:eek: More are coming! There's an invasion! Time to get out old Sci-Fi movies and learn the weak points of these obviously genetically engineered arachnids!

[Kuruharan]

Hmmm...

I wonder if our mod in spider's clothing is attempting to engineer a coup and bringing in minions for the deed...

[Lhunardawen]

Definitely not Roggie. Not enough swooning going on.
Ah, but that could be an effect of the mutation!

04:26 PM Inktomi Slurp Spider Registering
Aaahh!!! There's more!!! :eek:

[HerenIstarion]

Not, it's not Roggie. I would have known

Else, this thread was 'lol's intermited with 'rofl' so far :D:D:D

[Lhunardawen]

HI, perhaps Roggie was promoted to being a spider without your knowledge? Nah...

But if there have been 2 ISS's seen registering (by Evisse and yours truly), then there must be Inktomi Slurp Spider II and III posting! But there wasn't!

[HerenIstarion]

I suppose spiders are not long lived. Inktomi spiders, at least, must not be older then their employing company. Since, they must be younger that 13. Therefore, as we may logically assume, ISS II and III failed to provide the administration with parental permit to join the board and haven't completed their registration... :rolleyes:

[Lhunardawen]

...Or the original Inktomi Slurp Spider is a cannibal. Poor spiders.

[Encaitare]

Speaking of some of those other creepy spidery things, I've noticed seemingly random arragements of letters and numbers under "welcome to our newest member." For example, yyhcrc9jy6 and xc19mfvi4s. I suppose these are the spider-folk, registering and infiltrating the system.... :eek:

[Mithalwen]

Speaking of some of those other creepy spidery things, I've noticed seemingly random arragements of letters and numbers under "welcome to our newest member." For example, yyhcrc9jy6 and xc19mfvi4s. I suppose these are the spider-folk, registering and infiltrating the system.... :eek:


These are not random - our new member have day jobs working as opticians' test boards......

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Didn't you know? yyhcrc9jy6 stands for Yellow Yes-men Hear Crazy Reports Concerning 9 Jawas Yelling "6". :) See? Not random at all. Now this (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showpost.php?p=378212&postcount=3) post by Heren seems mighty fishy, on the other hand...

[Encaitare]

Ah, well that clears things up a bit... :rolleyes:

[the phantom]

There's only one sure fire way to solve this mystery.

Somebody step on HI and see if any spider juice squirts out.

If not, move on to the next suspect.

[The Saucepan Man]

Well, applying the theory that a criminal never returns to the scene of their crime, we could discount anyone (other than the ISS itself) who has posted on this thread.

Of my main suspects, that knocks HI, Kuru and the phantom off the list.

Unless of course it's a double bluff ... :D

[HerenIstarion]

theory that a criminal never returns

Was it not rather a theory that criminal always returns to the scene? It means any of us may be the cuplrit, after all :rolleyes: Should we bar the door and cross-question the suspects?

For myself, I may assure you afore questioning takes place that it ain't me, honestly, never been there, never done that... (even if Roggie were :D)

[mark12_30]

What are we picking on H-I for? He appears *nowhere* on this list (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showgroups.php?).

Saucie, on the other hand....

[HerenIstarion]

What are we picking on H-I for?

Assuming that it was a mod-spider, no ground, yes. But why such a supposition is taken for granted? I've read about mod-vision, but am not sure I followed the reasoning :rolleyes:

Remark is being made on the background of reinforced disavowal of my humble self as a possible spidery candidate, of course :D

[mark12_30]

Several things cracked Spidey's Modcover ( unless it be an Admincover) :

we're all doing our very best to keep the Barrowdowns in an excellent condition.

In the profile, under occupation it says, "Holding the site together."


I mean, how dare you dispute my spidery ways! Keep this up and I will dabble with your posts, young lady.

This blew it wide open:

I am slightly confused. As far as I can see, the spiders should be completely hidden. When I log on to this account I cannot see the other spiders. Where are you all seeing them?


ALL TOGETHER NOW:

The Inki-Slurpy-Spider climbed up the Barrow-Spout...

[Bêthberry]

Isn't it amazing how a mere three posts have generated this much cha-- er, discussion. And not a word on Tolkien from the little arachnid yet either.

Oh, Slurpy, thou art tricksome.

[mark12_30]

Isn't it amazing how a mere three posts have generated this much cha-- er, discussion. And not a word on Tolkien from the little arachnid yet either.

Oh, Slurpy, thou art tricksome.

Good point, Bb; Inky isn't Shelob, nor Ungoliant, nor a Mirkwood Spider, now, is it? Where would an Inktomi Slurp Spider come from?

The Old Forest?

Among the reeds of the Entwash Delta?

The Dead Marshes?

Or perhaps .... lurking around Rath Dinen.

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

Yes, but mark... the problem with your otherwise excellent summary of Inktomi Slurp Spider's mod-revealing mistakes is that you forgot to take into account the extreme audacity of some of our members. *Wishes yet again it had been my idea*. Just because the Spider claims to have the ability to tweak posts doesn't mean he [or she] actually can. Why, even I have been known to offer the occasional [but mostly fruitless] threat of computer-nerdery and hacking skills. And it's not the first time that there have been hilarious alter-egos running around.

[the phantom]

Why the Inktomi Slurp Spider?

There are other spiders running around the Downs. Why was ISS selected to be their spokespider?

Is it a clue? Saucy- see if you can use your cryptic clues expertise to unravel this mystery.

Or actually, maybe someone else should. I don't trust SPM. He could be the spider! :eek:

I just don't know who I can trust anymore.

[mark12_30]

Actually, Inktomi ModSlurp, I wonder if it's a question of firewall. My original protest-filk was posted from behind a commercial firewall; the rest have been from home, behind a home firewall (albeit a well-maintained one.)

(EDIT) Orrrrrr..... maybe it's static IP versus dynamic IP? You could use your modMagic to check on that.

Eh, nevermind, I can still see them from here.

[lord of dor-lomin]

Why the Inktomi Slurp Spider?
Maybe because that's the title of the thread. :p

Oh- but I suppose you aren't looking for simple answers, are you? Want to have some fun with this, eh?

[Bêthberry]

Inktomi Slurp Spider has competition, and fiendishly clever competition at that.

MSNBotSpider is listed as newest member but is not in the Members List.

Fingers are being pointed.

[The Barrow-Wight]

All Spider Bots accounts are hereby closed, because Inktomi has begat MSNBot, which may in turn begat more Spiders (give an inch, they take a league). The only spiders we need discuss are those found in Mirkwood, or other Ungoliant spawn.

*** WARNING ***
Don't open Spider accounts, or I'll put an electronic Phial of Galadriel up your IP.