[The Saucepan Man]

With a flash, a skeletal woman robed in black carrying a great scythe appeared and started gooning and grimacing fleshlessly into the middle distance.

“Welcome back to Werewolf Four and Thirty,” she said. “The votes have been counted and verified, and I can now reveal that the first person to be lynched in Woodgard is ….”

Caught up in the moment, the assembled delegates held their breath, even though they already knew the result.

“… xyzzy!”

Gasps, cheers, and not a few boos, rang out as xyzzy stepped forward.

“Xyzzy, you have one hour to say your goodbyes,” the Grim Daviner continued, “I’m coming to get you!”

“Er, I thought that these narratives were supposed to be all atmospheric and canonical,” Kath whispered to The Sixth Wizard.

“I think that idea went out of the window when the roles started being posted,” muttered Sixth in reply.

“But how are we to kill him?” asked Rune Son of Bjarne, as it occurred to him that the village had been so intent upon its moot all day that no method of administering capital punishment had yet been prepared.

“’E’s a witch! Burn him!” shouted Nogrod, predictably, in an unfeasibly high-pitched voice.

“Can’t we just … ahem …” spluttered Shastanis Althreduin, clearing his throat. “Sorry, I’m a bit horse.”

Gasps, cheers and boos turned to groans.

“Can’t we just chop his head off?” the centaur continued.

“You should be careful that you don’t get a frog in your throat,” observed the guy who be short. “They can be fatal in these kinds of situations.”

“I say that we needlessly build an incredibly complex catapult-device-thing,” suggested Volo hirsutely, “and - er - catapult him out of the village.”

“Ye olde catapulte,” said Meneltarmacil. “Thou knowest what. It just mayeth work.”

“No!” declared de Legate of Amon Lanc solemnly. “I decree that we administer a fatal dose of poison.”

“By what authority do you make such a decree?” demanded Mithalwen.

“I am De Legate!” he replied, mysteriously.

“Look, you can’t claim to wield supreme executionary power just ‘cause some grammatically inept mod made a narrative-based pun on your name,” she challenged.

“Madam,” interjected Boromir88, “Might I ask by what authority you claim to nit-pick the moderator’s grammar?”

“But what about xyzzy?” enquired Aganzir, polishing her axe impatiently.

“We should administer a spanking!” declared Rikae, naughtily. "Spankings all round!"

“Enough with the Pythonicity already!” cried Isabellkya.

“We could just let him go,” suggested Feanor of the Peredhil controversially.

“…” said mormegil.

“…” agreed Gil-Galad.

"Hooray for Follywood!" sang out Durelin, inexplicably.

“Honorable chair, fellow delegates,” stated Thinlómien, rising from her chair. “Acknowledging the many points made by the assembled delegates in the foregoing moot and noting that voting closed over an hour ago, INSTRAW would like to propose a motion requiring that strenuous efforts be made to draw up a framework within which the conditions might be agreed for bringing about the ultimate death of the condemned delegate, xyzzy. Thank you.”

Xyzzy, in the meantime, had quietly, uneventfully and inobtrusively hung himself in a corner.

********************************

“Cheeky blighters!,” muttered Radagast some miles away in Rhosgobel, as he pruned his tomato plants. “Questioning my grammar! The very impudence of it. And now they has gone and killed an innocent.”

“Indeed they has,” observed the lark perched on his shoulder. “But look on the bright side. At least the moderator has used up all his role-based quips all at once.”

********************************

The dead:

The Saucepan Man - Slaughtered and boiled up in a spicy ghoulash on Night zero.
xyzzy - Got bored of the role-based banter and hung himself quietly, uneventfully and inobtrusively on Day 1 (Ordinary Innocent)

The living:

Mormegil
Rikae
Durelin
Aganzir
Gil-Galad
Shastanis Althreduin
Volo
Nogrod
Boromir88
Meneltarmacil
The Sixth Wizard
Thinlómien
Legate of Amon Lanc
Kath
Isabellkya
the guy who be short
Mithalwen
Feanor of the Peredhil
Rune Son of Bjarne

Those with Nightly activities, do your stuff. And don't forget to send me your choices no later than one hour before the deadline.