The Downer would like to assure its readers that we have a very good explanation for the past two weeks hiatus. So here are the reasons our staff haven't been putting out new content;
We got freaked out by last year's solar eclipse, and barricaded ourselves in an underground bunker, where to this day we await the end of the world.
Either that, or we're trapped beneath a pile of unsold P&A t-shirts.
But then we discovered that the Downer was just a figment of our imagination - an imagination long since shredded by our chronic twin addictions to strong alcohol and horse painkillers.
We'd written the instructions on how to update the site on a marzipan wafer, which was erroneously swallowed by a clown.
Then the rozzers discovered our illegal whale ovary removing factory, and dragged us off to the cells.
So, without further delay, here is the newest issue of the Downer. With a brand new look to hide the fact that we have no new content.
Now back to your regularly scheduled Phalian.
Don't forget that if you've lost track of The Phantom and Alien, you can look back though the...
PHANTOM AND ALIEN
COMIC ARCHIVE THING
The Downer will be back next week. We promise. And also, Hookbill promises that he will no longer imagine that The Downer has any staff.