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Hookbill the Goomba · 02-23-2005, 01:00 PM

Excerpt from The Hitchhiker's guide to Middle Earth, Page 634784, section 5a. Entry: Eregion

Back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the Eldar, life was wild, rich and mostly tax-free.

Mighty companies plied their way between exotic forests and mountains, seeking adventure and reward amongst the furthest reaches of Middle Earth. In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Eriador were real small fury creatures from Eriador. And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds and to boldly split infinities that none had split before.

Many Eldar, of course, became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because in those days no one was really poor- at least, no one worth speaking of. And for the richest and most successful merchants, life became very dull and niggly, and they began to imagine that this was therefore the fault of the land they had settled in- none of it was entirely satisfactory: either the climate wasn't quite right in the later part of the afternoon, the day was half an hour too long or the orcs were just the wrong shade of pink.

And thus were created the conditions for a staggering new form of industry: magic ring forging. The home of this industry was Eregion where massively wise elves (and one particular Maiar) made tremendously powerful magic rings that would give the wearers power over most of their problems.

But, so successful was this venture, that Eregion itself became the richest area in all of what remains of history and so the system broke down and the empire collapsed, and a long sullen silence settle over a billion starving worlds, disturbed only by the pen scratching of scholars as they laboured into the night over smug little treaties on the value of a planned political economy.

Eregion itself disappeared and its memory soon passed into the obscurity of legend.

In these enlightened days, of course, no one believes a word of it and it is considered a load of old dingo’s kidneys.

02-23-2005, 01:00 PM	#35
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Excerpt from The Hitchhiker's guide to Middle Earth, Page 634784, section 5a. Entry: Eregion Back in the mists of ancient time, in the great and glorious days of the Eldar, life was wild, rich and mostly tax-free. Mighty companies plied their way between exotic forests and mountains, seeking adventure and reward amongst the furthest reaches of Middle Earth. In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women and small furry creatures from Eriador were real small fury creatures from Eriador. And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds and to boldly split infinities that none had split before. Many Eldar, of course, became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because in those days no one was really poor- at least, no one worth speaking of. And for the richest and most successful merchants, life became very dull and niggly, and they began to imagine that this was therefore the fault of the land they had settled in- none of it was entirely satisfactory: either the climate wasn't quite right in the later part of the afternoon, the day was half an hour too long or the orcs were just the wrong shade of pink. And thus were created the conditions for a staggering new form of industry: magic ring forging. The home of this industry was Eregion where massively wise elves (and one particular Maiar) made tremendously powerful magic rings that would give the wearers power over most of their problems. But, so successful was this venture, that Eregion itself became the richest area in all of what remains of history and so the system broke down and the empire collapsed, and a long sullen silence settle over a billion starving worlds, disturbed only by the pen scratching of scholars as they laboured into the night over smug little treaties on the value of a planned political economy. Eregion itself disappeared and its memory soon passed into the obscurity of legend. In these enlightened days, of course, no one believes a word of it and it is considered a load of old dingo’s kidneys. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 02-23-2005 at 01:15 PM.