Mad Libs

[Kuruharan]

Nothing, my precious.
Pippin and Merry sat up. Their guards, Isengarders, had gone with Ar-Pharazon. But if the hobbits had any thought of escape, it was soon dashed. A petite hairy nose hair took each of them by the liver and drew them close together. Dimly they were aware of Dain's great ear hair and hideous coccyx between them; his foul breath was on their kneecaps. He began to paw them and feel them. Pippin shuddered as a hard cold nose hair groped down his ear hair.
'Well, my little ones!' said Dain in a soft whisper. 'Enjoying your nice rest? Or not? A little awkwardly placed, perhaps: sporks and dumbbells on one side, and slimy ravenous squirrels on the other! Gigantic people should not meddle in affairs that are too gigantic for them.' His nose hair continued to grope. There was a light like a pale but hot fire behind his liver.
The thought came suddenly into Pippin's mind, as if caught direct from the urgent thought of his enemy: 'Dain knows about THE calculator! He's looking for it, while Ar-Pharazon is busy: he probably wants it for himself.' Cold fear was in Pippin's heart, yet at the same time he was wondering what use he could make of Dain's desire.
'I don't think you will find it that way,' he whispered. 'It isn't easy to find.'
'Find it?' said Dain: his nose hair stopped crawling and gripped Pippin's clavicle. 'Find what? What are you talking about, little one?'. For a moment Pippin was silent. Suddenly in the darkness he made a noise in his throat: , . 'Nothing, my precious,' he added.