Be careful what you wish for...

[Hookbill the Goomba]

I wish The Council of Elrond wasn't so darn long!

Your wish is granted. The Council is shorter. Twenty yards shorter. So now all the hobbits, elves, dwarves and men have to be squashed together causing more arguments until the council lasts for nine days.

I wish the Orcs weren’t all Londoners.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba

I wish the Orcs weren’t all Londoners.

You mean, orcs are Londoners?

- Puzzled fairy grandmother

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Have you not listened to them on the films and on the BBC radio thing. They are all cockneys! Am I the only one who sees this?
If so,

I wish I wasn't the only one who sees this. :P

[Formendacil]

Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba

I wish I wasn't the only one who sees this. :P

Your wish is granted, but for spoiling their mental view of Orks, Hookbill is suspended from the 'Downs. Permanently.

I wish Sauron was a Grilled Cheese Sandwich.

[CaptainofDespair]

Originally Posted by Formendacil

I wish Sauron was a Grilled Cheese Sandwich.

Poof! Sauron is Grilled Cheese. And Mount Doom is turned into a Bowl of Tomato Soup. Sauron is eaten by the starving orcs of Mordor.

I wish Gandalf was a Giant-sized Snow Cone.

[Boromir88]

I wish Gandalf was a Giant-sized Snow Cone.

I grant your wish, but you eat Gandalf the Giant-sized Snow Cone, which gives you an uncurable brainfreeze until which you have to embark on a long, dangerous, treacherous year's journey to Mount Doom where to get rid of the brainfreeze you need to jump in the lava.

I wish Mumakil could tight-rope walk.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

I wish Mumakil could tight-rope walk.

Sha-la Sha-loom, Shal-ish, Granted is your wish. But there is no rope strong enough to hold them and they fall onto the Hobbiton when they are doing a cross Shire walk!

I wish that Doriath was a theme park