The Mount Zoom Challenge - GAME

[Maeggaladiel]

"THIS IS AMAZING!" Sauron yelled happily. "I CAN'T BELIEVE WE ACTUALLY WON! IT DOESN'T REALLY SEEM RIGHT, YOU KNOW?" Saruon hefted the trophy above his head and shook it. The crowd went wild. This may have been out of fear rather than admiration, though.

"Yes," Mouth mused. "It was really convenient of Bag Endles-Fuel to disappear like that..."

"GOTTA LOVE THE RANDOM TIME-SPACE VORTEX, HUH?" He looked down, unhappy. "I AM, HOWEVER, SOMEWHAT CONCERNED WITH THE FACT THAT THEY STILL HAVE MY RING OF POWER. WHAT IF THEY DO ONE OF THOSE WEIRD TIME-ALTERING THINGS, WHERE THEY, LIKE, STEP ON A BUTTERFLY OR SOMETHING AT THE DAWN OF TIME AND THAT CAUSES SOME CHAIN REACTION SO I NEVER EXIST? OR THAT THE NABISCO COMPANY IS NEVER CREATED?"

His eyes widened, a feat that was near impossible considering that his eyes are two holes in an iron helmet.

"WHAT IF THEY GO BACK TO THE TIME WHEN I WAS BUT A SERVANT OF ANOTHER?!!"

There was a moment of silence as he pondered this.

"NAH..."

"My lord..." Mouth began, kicking the dirt.

"YES, MINION?" Saruon prompted as he waved to the adoring crowd. At least, he pretended they were adoring. Really, they were probably all cheering in fear of his horrible wrath should they do otherwise. Or they were screaming obscenities. Or choking to death on the Mountain's exhaust. It was hard to tell when there were so many voices screaming so loudly.

"Well, my lord, we won, and I was wondering if you'd keep your promise." He suddenly looked very small as the Dark One turned and fixed his attention on him. For a moment, Mouth feared his life would end.

"I ALWAYS KEEP MY PROMISES!" boomed Sauron. "WHAT WAS IT I PROMISED YOU AGAIN?"

"A promotion, my lord." Mouth looked hopeful. Saruon pondered this for a moment.

"AH YES, I REMEMBER. VERY WELL. MOUTH OF SAURON, YOU ARE HEREBY BEING PROMOTED TO RANK OF... MOUTH-AND-LOWER-SINUS-AREA OF SAURON!!"

Mouth's nose suddenly got much larger and redder.

"Oh... lovely." Mouth said flatly.

"YOU ARE WELCOME."