How to Annoy Sauron(a.k.a How to get yourself killed) - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Morai · 11-04-2006, 10:58 AM

"Have you considered a contact lense? I think you would look much better in blue."

Or

"My your eye seems a little bloodshot, do you want some eyedrops?"

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-04-2006, 12:53 PM

Saying, "Sauron is so stupid! Look at his face - he loves me poking him with this broom!" is probably not wise.

Farael · 11-04-2006, 01:23 PM

For (movie) Sauron: Let a few dozen white doves fly... straight into the big search-light eye.

For (book) Sauron: Take the One ring to him, but along make a few hundred copies.... and play "Deal or No Deal" with him, tossing the ones not chosen to Orodurin.

Laleena · 11-04-2006, 01:32 PM

Sing your questions

Shout wow after every sentence of his lecture

Watch people through binoculars

Rikae · 11-04-2006, 01:35 PM

Insert witticisms like "It's better than a sharp stick in the eye!" or "eye'll be seeing you!" or "My, what a big eye you have!" into every sentence, and then double over with laughter.

Hookbill the Goomba · 11-04-2006, 01:53 PM

During one of Saurons speeches or lectures, shout "I love it!" really, really, really, REALLY loudly every seven minutes.

Get the plastic thing from the middle of a Kinder Egg, and put it in your mouth and spit it out at him really hard!

Ask him if he wants a palantir fight.

Hand him a shopping list full of really funny items, such as 'Eye cream', 'monocles', 'contact lenses', and 'EYES' and say, "If you could get those to me by three o'clock, that'd be great!"

Then poke him with a stick.

Turn up to a 'join the Mordor Army' interview session, wearing one of those novelty inflatable sumo wrestler suits. Only with a tie.

Fire all of his clothes and armour out of a catapult into Mount Doom... For a joke!

Bring a flamingo to Barad-Dur and try to ride it around the battlements.

mormegil · 11-04-2006, 05:06 PM

Call him 'Pookey' frequently.

Have him wear a bonnet.

Tell him "Voldermort could kick your butt"

Esgallhugwen · 11-04-2006, 06:31 PM

Quite seriously state that pink is the new black in defense of why you painted his chambers a blushing pink pastel colour.

11-04-2006, 10:58 AM	#1
Morai Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2002 Location: Where young people go to retire Posts: 709	Random Titles get annoying "Have you considered a contact lense? I think you would look much better in blue." Or "My your eye seems a little bloodshot, do you want some eyedrops?" __________________ "So why the safe distance, this curious look? Why tear out single pages when you can throw away the book? Why pluck one string when you can strum the guitar? MeWithoutYou http://fortyfifthparadox.com

11-04-2006, 12:53 PM	#2
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Saying, "Sauron is so stupid! Look at his face - he loves me poking him with this broom!" is probably not wise. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

11-04-2006, 01:23 PM	#3
Farael Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: In hospitals, call rooms and (rarely) my apartment. Posts: 1,538	For (movie) Sauron: Let a few dozen white doves fly... straight into the big search-light eye. For (book) Sauron: Take the One ring to him, but along make a few hundred copies.... and play "Deal or No Deal" with him, tossing the ones not chosen to Orodurin. __________________ I prepared Explosive Runes this morning.

11-04-2006, 01:32 PM	#4
Laleena Animated Skeleton Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: in Mirkwood riding my horse Posts: 27	Sing your questions Shout wow after every sentence of his lecture Watch people through binoculars __________________ Sarcasm isn't the lowest form of wit, it isn't wit at all.~ Halt

11-04-2006, 01:53 PM	#6
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	During one of Saurons speeches or lectures, shout "I love it!" really, really, really, REALLY loudly every seven minutes. Get the plastic thing from the middle of a Kinder Egg, and put it in your mouth and spit it out at him really hard! Ask him if he wants a palantir fight. Hand him a shopping list full of really funny items, such as 'Eye cream', 'monocles', 'contact lenses', and 'EYES' and say, "If you could get those to me by three o'clock, that'd be great!" Then poke him with a stick. Turn up to a 'join the Mordor Army' interview session, wearing one of those novelty inflatable sumo wrestler suits. Only with a tie. Fire all of his clothes and armour out of a catapult into Mount Doom... For a joke! Bring a flamingo to Barad-Dur and try to ride it around the battlements. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 11-04-2006 at 01:56 PM.

11-04-2006, 01:35 PM	#5
Rikae Mellifluous Maia Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A glade open to the stars, deep in Nan Elmoth Posts: 3,489	Insert witticisms like "It's better than a sharp stick in the eye!" or "eye'll be seeing you!" or "My, what a big eye you have!" into every sentence, and then double over with laughter.

11-04-2006, 05:06 PM	#7
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,651	Call him 'Pookey' frequently. Have him wear a bonnet. Tell him "Voldermort could kick your butt" __________________ “I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

11-04-2006, 06:31 PM	#8
Esgallhugwen Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Where the Moon cries against the snow Posts: 526	Quite seriously state that pink is the new black in defense of why you painted his chambers a blushing pink pastel colour. __________________ "...for the sin of the idolater is not that he worships stone, but that he worships one stone over others. -8:9:4 The Witness of Fane"

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Switch to Linear Mode Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode