Barrow-themed Christmas Greetings - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

***Gilthalion*** · 12-24-2007, 06:00 PM

It was Christmas Eve, and the old hobbit thought on his friends of Auld Lang Syne and thought also that they might find a pleasant Yule Tide diversion in a recent bit of what he called verse... ...naturally, they cringed, but read it anyway...

Gulf Shores Night Before Christmas

© 2007 Robert W. Gardner.

'Twas the night before Christmas
And through the beach tower,
Not a creature was stirring,
No, not at that hour.

The lights had been strung
Through the palm trees with care,
In hopes that some tourists
Would spend Christmas there.

Some snowbirds were roosting,
Most likely asleep,
For not one was complaining,
Not even a peep!

The renters were booking
Just as they should
With vacationers coming
The next year looked good!

The real estate agents'
Dreams were aglow
With visions of buyers
Who fled from the snow.

Then over the water
There came such a splashing
The guard fell from his chair
And awoke from the crashing.

His flashlight came on
As he rose from the floor
Looked out of the window
And ran through the door.

“It’s those naked young lovers
Again in the spa!
This time I’ll catch them!
And I’ll call the law!”

But he couldn’t believe
What he saw right out there:
A skiff pulled by dolphins
Who swam through the air?

They flew up above
The waves and the foam
Up over the condos
And every beach home!

The guard just stood staring
With his mouth open wide
And he could not believe
What flew over the tide!

The dolphins were soaring
At the command
Of a jolly old elf
Who was fat but well tanned!

Up, up they went,
Right up to the roof.
The guard’s report read
Like he drank Eighty Proof!

But, when they got there
The rooftop exploded
With gifts for the Island
That Santa unloaded!

Of course it was Santa,
Who else could it be?
Flying with gifts
Out over the sea?

Saint Nicolas came
As he does every year
With News of the Savior
And of great Christmas cheer.

His work soon was done
And he soon flew away
To parts of the world
Where he needed a sleigh.

Though no one believed
What the guard had to say,
He didn’t get fired
Since it was Christmas Day!

Child of the 7th Age · 12-25-2007, 11:52 AM

I thought a Christmas card from the Tolkien family wouldn't be inappropriate. JRRT was just ten months old.....

http://www.birmingham.gov.uk/Media?MEDIA_ID=197461

Bêthberry · 12-25-2007, 10:17 PM

Great contributions here! And a few more thematic offerings:

I did sincerely try googling Kwanza and squirrel and Hannukha and squirrel (and various permutations thereof) and even Eid and squirrel, but not even a skwerl shaped latke could I find. I did find this for all you werewolf fans though:

Apparently there are lyrics and the song is sung to 'Joy to the World'.

Bêthberry · 12-25-2007, 10:37 PM

And using the 'six degrees of separation' argument, here's another seasonal appropriation that some Downers at least might enjoy:

(PS. Sorry for double posting but there's an image limit here.)

TheGreatElvenWarrior · 12-26-2007, 01:41 PM

Bethberry, are you inquiring that we look like Shrek?

Estelyn Telcontar · 12-26-2007, 09:07 PM

I saw that Shrek Christmas special, Bb! Thanks for the image as a reminder.

Bêthberry · 12-27-2007, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheGreatElvenWarrior

Bethberry, are you inquiring that we look like Shrek?

I believe Esty has answered you, TGEW.

Estelyn Telcontar · 12-28-2007, 03:38 AM

Should anyone find a source for an image of Fiona in that fur hat, please do let me know - it would be a wonderful winter avatar!

12-24-2007, 06:00 PM	#1
*Gilthalion* Hobbitus Emeritus Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: South Farthing Posts: 635	Gulf Shores Night Before Christmas It was Christmas Eve, and the old hobbit thought on his friends of Auld Lang Syne and thought also that they might find a pleasant Yule Tide diversion in a recent bit of what he called verse... ...naturally, they cringed, but read it anyway... Gulf Shores Night Before Christmas © 2007 Robert W. Gardner. 'Twas the night before Christmas And through the beach tower, Not a creature was stirring, No, not at that hour. The lights had been strung Through the palm trees with care, In hopes that some tourists Would spend Christmas there. Some snowbirds were roosting, Most likely asleep, For not one was complaining, Not even a peep! The renters were booking Just as they should With vacationers coming The next year looked good! The real estate agents' Dreams were aglow With visions of buyers Who fled from the snow. Then over the water There came such a splashing The guard fell from his chair And awoke from the crashing. His flashlight came on As he rose from the floor Looked out of the window And ran through the door. “It’s those naked young lovers Again in the spa! This time I’ll catch them! And I’ll call the law!” But he couldn’t believe What he saw right out there: A skiff pulled by dolphins Who swam through the air? They flew up above The waves and the foam Up over the condos And every beach home! The guard just stood staring With his mouth open wide And he could not believe What flew over the tide! The dolphins were soaring At the command Of a jolly old elf Who was fat but well tanned! Up, up they went, Right up to the roof. The guard’s report read Like he drank Eighty Proof! But, when they got there The rooftop exploded With gifts for the Island That Santa unloaded! Of course it was Santa, Who else could it be? Flying with gifts Out over the sea? Saint Nicolas came As he does every year With News of the Savior And of great Christmas cheer. His work soon was done And he soon flew away To parts of the world Where he needed a sleigh. Though no one believed What the guard had to say, He didn’t get fired Since it was Christmas Day! __________________ Please read my fan fiction novel THE HOBBITS. Wanna hear me read Tolkien? Gilthalion's Grand Adventures!

12-25-2007, 11:52 AM	#2
Child of the 7th Age Spirit of the Lonely Star Join Date: Mar 2002 Posts: 5,133	I thought a Christmas card from the Tolkien family wouldn't be inappropriate. JRRT was just ten months old..... http://www.birmingham.gov.uk/Media?MEDIA_ID=197461 __________________ Multitasking women are never too busy to vote.

12-25-2007, 10:17 PM	#3
Bêthberry Cryptic Aura Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 6,003	Great contributions here! And a few more thematic offerings: I did sincerely try googling Kwanza and squirrel and Hannukha and squirrel (and various permutations thereof) and even Eid and squirrel, but not even a skwerl shaped latke could I find. I did find this for all you werewolf fans though: Apparently there are lyrics and the song is sung to 'Joy to the World'. __________________ I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away.

12-25-2007, 10:37 PM	#4
Bêthberry Cryptic Aura Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 6,003	And using the 'six degrees of separation' argument, here's another seasonal appropriation that some Downers at least might enjoy: (PS. Sorry for double posting but there's an image limit here.) __________________ I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away.

12-26-2007, 01:41 PM	#5
TheGreatElvenWarrior Mighty Quill Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Walking off to look for America Posts: 2,230	Bethberry, are you inquiring that we look like Shrek? __________________ The Party Doesn't Start Until You're Dead.

12-26-2007, 09:07 PM	#6
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,500	I saw that Shrek Christmas special, Bb! Thanks for the image as a reminder. __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

12-28-2007, 03:38 AM	#8
Estelyn Telcontar Princess of Skwerlz Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles) Posts: 7,500	Should anyone find a source for an image of Fiona in that fur hat, please do let me know - it would be a wonderful winter avatar! __________________ 'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...'

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