Chatau D' Mordor

[Galadriel55]

And by the way, you should change it to Chatau de Mordor, because d' is used only when the following word begins with either a vowel or h.

[Bêthberry]

Hilarious possibilities here, Hooky! What would Mirth do without your wild and wacky madness?

I'm going to leave aside the possibility that the Ringwraiths had their own chain of restaurants in Morc'dor and consider just what kinds of restaurants orcs might favour--or savour.

I find it difficult to conceive of a vegetarian component of orc cuisine. Certainly "greens" would not call to my mind the leafy folliage but I'm sure there's an enterprising Downer who could persuade me otherwise.

I'm inclined to the notion that orcs would excel at fast food chains with a high component of adulterated substances. Such establishments would likely garner a range of 'heads' on a Guide M'orc'lin. So, without further ado, here's my suggestions for Morc'dor restaurants.

T'orco Bell

M'orc'Donald's

Fazorci's

Starb'orcs

Red Orcster

2 4'orc 1 Pizza

Tim Orc'ons

Viener V'orc

Ch'orc king, (a company from the far east, in competition with Manch'orc Wok)

Y'orcinoya--raw fish a speciality

Al Ta'zorc (famous in Far Harad)

Spizzorco --known for pasta with unnamed ingredients in their red sauce

Dunkin' D'orcs--famous for deep fried round . . . things

I hope this doesn't get the site sued--or me splattered with rotten compost for unimaginative overuse of the species name.

[Mnemosyne]

Originally Posted by Bethberry

I hope this doesn't get the site sued--or me splattered with rotten compost for unimaginative overuse of the species name.

Rotten compost? Isn't that a delicacy?

[Eönwë]

Originally Posted by Galadriel55

And by the way, you should change it to Chatau de Mordor, because d' is used only when the following word begins with either a vowel or h.

I think that's the point- Orcish spelling isn't perfect. Otherwise it would be "Château" as well.

Originally Posted by Bêthberry

Certainly "greens" would not call to my mind the leafy folliage

Well, If leafy foliage can include what's left on last year's meat...

[Galadriel55]

Don't forget the orc delicacy - the Shelobster! It's a real treat, and worth the lives of a few orc regiments...

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

I gave some thought to the idea of Orcish menus, and decided that they probably have some sort of military canteen system. A brief search through HoME extended edition revealed this, which I reproduce complete with grease stains.

[Galadriel55]

Let's not foget this entry:

Balrog wings: deep fried

It is not guaranteed that your meal will come anytime soon

[Morthoron]

And of course Orkish appetizers at Chateau d'Mordor would include finger food. Whose fingers, I am not sure...

[Galadriel55]

Originally Posted by Morthoron

And of course Orkish appetizers at Chateau d'Mordor would include finger food. Whose fingers, I am not sure...

Though no rings, onion or otherwise...