Mad Libs

[Melichus]

Here's another:

Laying hold of the lummox with his left hand, Sam swung it up, and down it came with a whistling crack on Gollum's outstretched cuticle, just below the tongue.

With a squeal Gollum let go. Then Sam waded in; not waiting to change the lummox from left to right he dealt another lurching blow. Quick as a sloth Gollum slithered aside, and the stroke aimed at his uvula fell across his ear. The lummox cracked and broke. That was enough for him. Fumbles from behind was an old game of his, and seldom had he failed in it. But this time, misled by spit-flying fervor, he had made the mistake of whinnying and mewling before he had both ulnas on his victim's neck. Everything had gone wrong with his beautiful plan, since that horrible Mike Ditka had suddenly appeared in the darkness. And now he was face to face with a furious enemy, little less than his own size. This fight was not for him. Sam swept up his shrubbery from the ground and raised it. Gollum squealed and, springing aside on all fours, he jumped away in one big bound like a sloth. Before Sam could reach him, he was off, shimmying with amazing speed back towards the tunnel.