Funny lyrics that LOTR characters would never sing

[Thenamir]

This one is shamelessly thieved from another site -- the original was shamelessly adapted from the "Knights of the Round table" song from Monty Python And The Holy Grail -- but it's good nonetheless.

Frodo and Sam peer down into Mordor for the first time.

Frodo: "Mordor...Mordor!"
Sam (under his breath): "It's only a model."
Frodo: Shhhh!
Frodo contemplates a moment.
Frodo: Well Sam, this is it. Let us go...to Mordor!"

(1, 2, 3, 4, da-dum da-dum dum dum!)

We're orcs from the Land of Mordor!
We dance along the corridor!
We do routines and cut out spleens
And attack the good guys border!
Good food at Cirith Ungol
Bread with mold quite fungal!

We're orcs of the land of Mordor,
We kill when we're given the order
But many times, we're given rhymes,
That are to sing quite poor(dor)
We guard here at Cirith Ungol,
And we never, ever, bungle.

*orcs tap-dance along the corridors, play tunes on each other's helmets, etc.*

All are tough and sure-dor
Chop up your wife and dorter,
We kill the elves, and men themselves,
Despite the fact we're shorter,
We have fun in the land of Mordor

*an extremely fat orc gets up and sings*

I'm very rarely bored(ur)

(song ends)

Frodo: "On second thought, Sam, let us not go to Mordor...it is a silly place."

[ September 13, 2002: Message edited by: Thenamir ]