Special News: The land of Modor

[good idea at the time]

My dear Doug*Platypus of Evil Montreme Enterprises,

I think that souveniours are a brilliant idea and just what the Magical Land of Mordor needs. Just imagine, if a Dwarf, Elf, Man, Hafling, Orc, Ent, Balrog, etc, goes home wearing a shirt with Skippy the Nazgul and the park's name and logo on it, his/her/its whole clan, family, shire, forest, horde, etc. will want to come. They'll be paying us to do our maketing!

I'm sending the Mouth of Sauron with this letter to work out financial arangements, and yes, you did type that you intend to make a fortune, but that's quite alright. You see, once I have the One Ring, your land- where do you live again? - will be paying tribute to me anyway, so it's all the same really.

I look forward to having such a creative and ambitious ( though hopefully not too ambitous, of course) corportation working with the Magical Land of Mordor. For my terms and conditions, see #1 of my stipulations in my published letter to Mr. Drim, Jr.


Sincerely,
The Lord Sauron. ( I believe I have made myself quite understood in this letter.)