Movie Bloopers! - Page 11 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Feared Half-Elf · 06-29-2003, 12:27 PM

Umm, er, um, here goes!

*Battle of Helm's Deep. Legolas is pulling Aragorn and Gimli up on the rope. Bloodied mass of rags falls over the edge at his feet.*

Legolas: I thought the orcs in this shoot weren't supposed to shoot them?
*Elrond appeares in sunglasses from shadows*

Elrond: I am afraid that is my doing. It is all part of my master plan to get rid of everyone and RULE THE WORLD!!!!!
*Legolas shoots him*

Legolas: But it's me who is going to take over the world!!!!
*Pulls out sunglasses, puts them on and walks away whistling*

Ok, I'm tired...

Lily Bombadil · 06-29-2003, 01:06 PM

No, Meela. I meant an award that you've already awarded to me.

My sister thought of something good so I fixed it a little...
(In The Hobbit, the goblin's got very bored. So they wondered down to Gollum's cave. At the edge of the lake-)

Goblin #1: I wonder how deep this sucker goes.
Goblin #2: Let's find out.

(-Goblin #1 picks up a large rock, tosses it out to the center of the lake, &-)

Gollum: Hargh! My preciouss.

(-doesn't see old Gollum paddling along in his boat, bonking him on the head.)

THE END

Lily Bombadil · 06-30-2003, 09:27 PM

At the end of the Ring battle in which Sauron was cut down, the Elven and Human soldiers prance around singing 'We Are the Champions' while using their weaponry as guitars. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

At Fangorn Forest:
Treebeard: I almost feel that I dislike you both, but do not let us be hasty! Turn round!
*Merry & Pippin turn round*
Treebeard: Argh! *drops the hobbits in his fright*

[ June 30, 2003: Message edited by: Lily Bombadil ]

Meela · 07-01-2003, 07:22 AM

*laughs so much that she collapses and falls apart*

Oh god, they were the best ever!! *hands over a dozen blooper awards and a congratulatory lembas pie*

Elennar Starfire · 07-01-2003, 11:09 AM

All the orcs at helms deep are standing around and that old dude shoots one. Instead of falling forward, it falls backward and knocks the next orc down. domino effect for five rows, becuse after that they're all computer animated. the fifth orc falls through the sixth. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

I've already said this, but I want to say it again: computer animation is great. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Lily Bombadil · 07-01-2003, 03:15 PM

Okay, Meela. I've got the Middle-earthen super glue (mud mortar). We will put you back together! (By the way, thanks for the Blooper Award!)
Here's another random thought:

At Bilbo's party, Frodo sits down beside Sam-

Frodo: Go on, Sam! ask Rosie for a dance!
Sam: Uhh... I think I'll just have another ale.
Frodo: Oh, no you don't!
*Frodo grabs Sam & shoves him onto the dance "floor". Sam slams into Rosie with such force that he knocks her down. Then... DOMINO HOBBITS!*
Frodo: Whoa... I am SUPER FRODO!!! Da da da da da da! *record shreds*
Frodo: What???

Elennar Starfire · 07-01-2003, 04:32 PM

Gandalf jumps off Orthanc and misses Gwaihir.
Saruman looks down and says: "You missed!"

The person doing the special voice effects does something wrong in Galadriel's scary scene(In the place of a dark lord, etc) and her voice goes squeaky, so she sounds like she's been breathing helium.

Nureldawen · 07-02-2003, 02:24 AM

crud! i tried to reply, and i did it in the wrong place! well, here's my message.

[img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] me and my sisters make alternate scenes for movies all the time! Like....

(well, i borrowed these from "conan o'brian)
(both from lotr2 the movie)

Sam: Ugh! There's an orange stink here! Can ya smell it?
Frodo: Yes. I can smell it.
: [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img]rc comes out of port-a-potti::
Frodo: We're not alone

Eomer: I would cut off your head, dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground.
Legolas: They prefer to be called "little people"!!

This one if from the second book. though i can't remember it word for word, i remember my joke fit in perfectly when I was reading the book to my sis.

Aragorn: In any case, these woods are perilous, by night or day.
::Aragorn grabs a mike::
::Gimli gets some shades on and a drum set::
::Legolas gets his piano::
Aragorn ::singing to the tune of "Night and day":: Night and day! There is danger! Of dwarfs, hobbits and ents, which one is stranger?

This is from the first book, near the end, after Celeborn gives them boats for the journey.

"Aragorn thanked Celeborn many times....."
Aragorn: THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU! ::kisses Celeborn's feet::
Celeborn: Get up, man! You're a Ranger, for goodness sakes!

Not to mention, me and my sis like to read a few words from one page, then skip to a random part of the next page, and then skip to the next page, etc etc, seeing if we can make a crazy sentance that is gramatically correct. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] it's fun!!

Nureldawen · 07-02-2003, 02:38 AM

OMG! u guys r so funny! lemme see if i can do some more.

::Frodo and Sam walking from the pub::
Hobbit to Rosie: Good night, sweet maiden of the golden ale!
Rosie: Okay, Fred. I have told you a hundred times, my name is ROSIE!! Roh-sie! Got it?

::Outside of Moria after Gandalf fell::
::Frodo in the distance::
Aragorn: Frodo!
Frodo: The hell with this! I'm coming, Gandalf!!
::Frodo runs, then leaps off the cliff::

::after the battle with the wargs::
::Legolas looks over the cliff Aragorn fell from::
Legolas: He's dead. ::walks away::
::camera pans down to aragorn hanging on a tree branch::
Aragorn: I'm down here, ya elven idiot!

::In Helm's Deep::
Eowyn: What happened to Aragorn?
Gimli: He fell..... Then after getting a little boo-boo, while he tried to get a band-aid for it, he was pulled off the cliff.

::In Helm's Deep, yet again::
::Gimli blows the horn::
Automated-voice: The horn you are trying to blow is not in service. Please take another breath and try again.
::Gimli tries again::
::Fart sound::
Aragorn: Gimli! ::holding his nose::
Gimli: It wasn't me! ::sniff:: Oh wait..... It was. I wondered if that pie had beans in it.

yeah. i'm cheesy.

Meela · 07-02-2003, 05:10 AM

Hey, Nureldawen [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] I almost posted on your other thread inviting you to join us here, but then I noticed you already had [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Anyway welcome, and if you've read any previous posts you may have picked up on the fact that I am the Official Keeper of the Much Coveted Blooper Awards.

Quote:

::Frodo and Sam walking from the pub::
Hobbit to Rosie: Good night, sweet maiden of the golden ale!
Rosie: Okay, Fred. I have told you a hundred times, my name is ROSIE!! Roh-sie! Got it?

::Outside of Moria after Gandalf fell::
::Frodo in the distance::
Aragorn: Frodo!
Frodo: The hell with this! I'm coming, Gandalf!!
::Frodo runs, then leaps off the cliff::

::after the battle with the wargs::
::Legolas looks over the cliff Aragorn fell from::
Legolas: He's dead. ::walks away::
::camera pans down to aragorn hanging on a tree branch::
Aragorn: I'm down here, ya elven idiot!

Those are super!! *hands Nureldawen a Blooper Award*

Lily Bombadil · 07-02-2003, 09:53 AM

Nureldawen, those were superlative! I haven't laughed that hard since I was a little hobbit, thank you very much. And another Blooper Award is well spent. (Meela, I love your siggy!)
I thought of one suddenly! In Rivendell:
Boromir: The Shards of Narsil! The blade that cut the Ring from Sauron's hand. *cuts finger* Waaaa!! My widdle finger!! I wa' my mommy!! Aaaaaaa!! *rolls on the floor in a tantrum*
Aragorn: Awww! It's alright, babe-eeeeee!!!
*rocks Boromir in his lap* Mummy Aragorn is here now. Don't cry, hon-eeeee!!
*Arwen walks up*
Arwen: Hem, hem! Aragorn, we've talked about this! I am the mommy and you are the daddy.
Aragorn: *hands over Boromir*

Lawks! That was stupid! [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img]

Nureldawen · 07-02-2003, 03:40 PM

that was SO messed up!!!! ::roflmao::

Gamja · 07-03-2003, 09:42 AM

*gollum sings in the pond with his fish*

*the fish flies out of Gollum's grasp*

gollum: oops!

Faramir: argh! that's the 3RD, TIME! that's it boys, peg'im.

director: *sigh* cut.

*in helm's deep*

Orc: *swings sword at haldir but misses and chops his foot off*

director: cut! take 2.

Orc: *swings again*

director: *sigh* for the last time, cut THIS way, not THAT way. good orc. take 3!

Orc: *kills haldir*

director: oh my... NO! THIS-WAY! give me that! like this! *whack* ow! nosebleed!

legolas luver*1 · 07-03-2003, 07:48 PM

In Moria Gimli jumps, lands funky& Legolas grabs his beard.
Gimli:If I do not make the jump tell my mom my dads wierd.(jumps)Not the beard!(He falls)
P.J:Orlando, youre not really suppos to drop him!!!(Orlie holds up a fake beard) O.All right bring in Danny Ddevito.
Croud [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]muttering)Whos Gimli's dad?

legolas luver*1 · 07-03-2003, 08:07 PM

In Rivendell

Boromir [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]ude the Shards of Narsil (he cuts his hand)OW my hand! (cuts himself again)Ow my other hand! (cuts himself again) Ow my spleen!!!

[ July 03, 2003: Message edited by: legolas luver*1 ]

[ July 03, 2003: Message edited by: legolas luver*1 ]

Elennar Starfire · 07-04-2003, 11:23 AM

Treebeard: *trips over a tree root*

Treebeard: Quickbeam! You did that on purpose! I'm telling my mommy! *runs off crying*

Meela · 07-05-2003, 03:27 PM

Shadowfax canters across the plains mtowards Gandalf.
Shadowfax rides straight past him.

Gandalf: huh...

Gandalf turns round and sees a contented Shadowfax eating carrots out of Theoden's hand, while Theoden grins evilly and waves to Gandalf.

Theoden: You didn't think I'd let you keep him, did you?

OR:

Gandalf turns round and sees a contented Shadowfax eating carrots out of Arwen's hand, while Arwen grins evilly and waves to Gandalf.

(Heck, she stole Glorfindel's horse... why not make it a hobby?)

Gamja · 07-05-2003, 05:12 PM

^^^ lol!

Horse-Maiden of the Shire · 07-05-2003, 11:33 PM

I thought of this one. In RotK:

Aragorn (to Anduril): You shall not be sheathed again until the last battle is fought.
*He looks at it fondly, and absentmindedly sheathes it*
Gandalf: Um...Aragorn...
Aragorn: What? Oh, yeah!
*He hastily takes out Anduril and looks around shifty-eyed, hoping nobody saw*

Lily Bombadil · 07-08-2003, 11:17 PM

Sam goes running out into the Anduin.

Frodo: Sam, go back! I'm going to Mordor alone!
Sam: Of course you are! And I'm going with you!
*Sam gets out chest deep and suddenly screams*
Frodo:What?
Sam: F-f-f-frodo... IT'S THE LOCH NESS MONSTER!!!!!!!! AAAAARGH!!!!!
*Sam walks on water getting out of the river & Frodo paddles so fast to the shore that motorboat sounds come from his boat*

Everdawn · 07-09-2003, 05:18 AM

The Uruk-hai marching on Helms Deep, there is a short stand off between the elves and men and the Uruk-hai.. Between them suddenly Leyton Hewitt runs between both of them, tennis racket in hand screaming
"C'mon!" before getting very scared and bolting in the poopsite direction, splattering his tennis whites with mud.

Elves and Uruk-hai: blink blink**
Aragorn: I am speechless.
Legolas: but you have to admit, he does look great in those tennis whites...
Aragorn: rolling eyes** Only you could say something like that...

07-09-2003, 02:55 PM

FOTR: frodo leaps from the hill giigling in rapture..ian forgets his cue and elijah disapears out of sight..suddenly a squeal floats up from the ground....
"AAAAAAARRGGGGHHH!!! i hurt my freakin privates again! geez ian that was the 16th time!"
Ian: "*giggles*..i love doing that scene"

not bad for a first shot eh? [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

07-09-2003, 03:02 PM

FOTR: frodo tumbles down the side of the mountain...and keeps on going???!!!
PJ: "CUTTTT! viggo! geez? where are you?"
looks around a bit and finds aragorn and boromir making out behind a snow man..
PJ stares blankly.
VM and SB stare at him with big grins
elijah :AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAA*fades into distance

Lëowen · 07-09-2003, 03:14 PM

At the very end of TTT (in the book at least):

Gandalf and Pippin are riding Shadowfax

Pippin: I did not know you rode bare-back, Gandalf. You haven't a saddle or bridle!

Gandalf:...You do not ride Shadowfax: he is willing to carry you- or not. If he is willing, that is enough. It is then his business to see that you remain on his back, unless you jump off into the air. *Gandalf falls off suddenly*

Not bad I suppose, for a first try...

Lily Bombadil · 07-09-2003, 04:46 PM

Very good, Leowen! Here's one from Imladris:
Arwen: It is mine to give to whom I will. Like my heart.
*Arwen & Aragorn kiss. Then they start to make out & fall off the footbridge*
P.J: (exasperatedly) Cut....

Silmiel of Imladris · 07-09-2003, 09:36 PM

Quote:

I..see dead people.

It would be great if they had Legolas say that in the pathes of the dead scene. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Ok I will give it a go, this is lame and kind of sick but here goes:

ROTK Sam finally finds Frodo in the Tower of Cirth Ungol.

Sam: Mr. Frodo! I found you at last! Are you alright?

Frodo: Yes Sam but the orcs took everything I had and I mean everything!

Sam: But you still have your clothes on Mr. Frodo. Were the orcs supposed to take them?

Frodo: I think so...maybe I should take them off and give them to the orcs...because you know I would hate to screw up the story line. *Begins to strip*

PJ: Oh for crying out loud!! Cut!!!

Well I thought it was funny away. [img]smilies/evil.gif[/img] [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Nureldawen · 07-09-2003, 11:50 PM

that one's more wrong than gimli's striptease! well, i guess not, because ellijah wood without clothes....... ::drools:: [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

Lily Bombadil · 07-10-2003, 12:14 PM

Hey, atleast it wasn't Sam stripping. I mean, I love the Samster and all, but EEEWW!! Now, Merry has some NICE arm muscles. *sigh* *my darling Frodo clears his throat in the background & I stop daydreaming about other hobbits* Hee, hee...

This one is more from the FotR book...

In Dimrill Dale.
Aragorn: *wrestling Frodo* Lemme SEE IT!! I hafta doctor IT!!!
Frodo: No!
Aragorn: But it might get infected!
Frodo: No!
Gimli: He just doesn't want to take his shirt off because knows he's not sexy like me.
Legolas: *snort*
Boromir: Ah, he probably doesn't want us to see his bra.
*Frodo's shirt rips revealing a red silk Demi bra*
Gimli: *chokes on his pipe smoke*
Legolas: *falls off his rock*
Boromir: I was just kidding!

Lily Bombadil · 07-10-2003, 12:42 PM

Quote:

Saruman:I am no longer Saruman the White-I am Saruman the multicoloured!
Gandalf:nice excuse...is that red there chetshup and that brown...chocolate, yes and the green then is grass!I told you when we picked out colours that white is not easy to handle-it gets dirty so easily. GREY instead is much more reasonable choice!

Radagast: What about Brown?
Gandalf: Shut up, Radagast. You were Pink before you fell into the manure pile.

Nureldawen · 07-10-2003, 05:23 PM

........did.....not.....see......that bra........coming.........

Silmiel of Imladris · 07-10-2003, 09:48 PM

Quote:

........did.....not.....see......that bra........coming.........

*giggles* I didn't either... [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Ok I will give it another shot, bare with me:
[img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img]

Frodo falls down the mountain and then feels for the ring.

Frodo: My Bling Bling is gone!

Boromir holds up ring: It is amazing that we go through so much trouble for such small and tacky Bling Bling.

Aragorn: Boromir, give the Bling Bling to Frodo.

Boromir: Fine I don't care. I have more Bling Bling than any of you.

PJ: CUT!!! You guys are pathetic! You may already have the Bling Bling but remember that it is I who gives out the Ching Ching.

Ok it was delightfully tacky yet unrefined. So what. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img] [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

07-11-2003, 09:44 AM

i can't remeber exact words..but anyway..

TTT (extended edition)
legolas reaches down and pull sout lembas bread...
"ahh lembas..one bite is enough to fill the stomach of a hungry man *takes bite*..alas...ear wax..oh sorry wrong movie.."
PJ: CUUUUUUUUUUTTTT
Harry potter : "COPY CAT!!"
[img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

Nureldawen · 07-11-2003, 10:43 AM

FOTR movie:
Legolas: It's Lembas. One bite is enough to sustain a grown man. ::takes a bite:: ::Homer-like:: Mmmm! Lembas!

TTT book:
"Merry and Pippin walked side by side along the Entwash..."
::Merry and Pippin walk side by side... hand in hand.... skipping.... singing "tra-la-la-la-LAAAA!":: [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img]

"Where are the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was sounding?"
Rohirrim ::singing to the tune of "where have all the flowers gone?":: : Where have all the riders gone? Long time passing!!!!

ROTK book:
Mouth of Sauron: It'll take more than a piece of elven glass.... ::looks at phial:: Oooo! Shiny!

sry; best i can do with 3 hours sleep!

Lily Bombadil · 07-11-2003, 02:25 PM

Nureldawen, Silmiel, are you two talking about Frodo's Demi Bra? O! That reminds me! I need to give him back that white Deep-plunge bra I borrow from him last week! He needs it for all those low-cut blouses he wears... O! Another blooper was just hatched!

Gandalf: I am Gandalf the White! *Legolas, Gimli, Aragorn look up. Gandalf is wearing red, sexy, lacy knickers*
Aragorn: I thought you were Gandalf the White.
Gandalf: Oh, I am. These are just the knickers. I, uh, got hot...
Legolas: You know, Gandalf, these are pretty nice.
Gimli: Where did you get them?
Gandalf: Victoria's Secret, of course!
Gimli: I knew it!
Aragorn: Hey! Those look like some of Arwen's!
Gandalf: Of course not! She wears a C cup. I'm an A. However, we did go shopping together. The girl has good taste!
Legolas: I'll say. Perhaps she'll let me give her a free fitting...
Aragorn: *pulls out Anduril* Oh, no you don't! Only I'm allowed to fit Arwen!
Gimli: Yeah? Well... I fitted Frodo!
Gandalf, Legolas, & Aragorn: Urrgh... *make faces*

Nureldawen · 07-11-2003, 04:48 PM

Ugh!!!! Just so wrong!

Meela · 07-11-2003, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Gimli: Yeah? Well... I fitted Frodo!

Oh, that made me laugh so much!! *hands over a Blooper Award*

***The Barrow-Wight*** · 07-11-2003, 04:51 PM

And with that lovely 'blooper', I will close this already too long thread.

06-29-2003, 12:27 PM	#401
Feared Half-Elf Wight Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Up a tree. Posts: 213	Umm, er, um, here goes! Battle of Helm's Deep. Legolas is pulling Aragorn and Gimli up on the rope. Bloodied mass of rags falls over the edge at his feet. Legolas: I thought the orcs in this shoot weren't supposed to shoot them? Elrond appeares in sunglasses from shadows Elrond: I am afraid that is my doing. It is all part of my master plan to get rid of everyone and RULE THE WORLD!!!!! Legolas shoots him Legolas: But it's me who is going to take over the world!!!! Pulls out sunglasses, puts them on and walks away whistling Ok, I'm tired... __________________ "You will find the Holy Grail in Castle Aaaaaaahhhhhh leans sideways" Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

06-29-2003, 01:06 PM	#402
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	No, Meela. I meant an award that you've already awarded to me. My sister thought of something good so I fixed it a little... (In The Hobbit, the goblin's got very bored. So they wondered down to Gollum's cave. At the edge of the lake-) Goblin #1: I wonder how deep this sucker goes. Goblin #2: Let's find out. (-Goblin #1 picks up a large rock, tosses it out to the center of the lake, &-) Gollum: Hargh! My preciouss. (-doesn't see old Gollum paddling along in his boat, bonking him on the head.) THE END __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

06-30-2003, 09:27 PM	#403
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	At the end of the Ring battle in which Sauron was cut down, the Elven and Human soldiers prance around singing 'We Are the Champions' while using their weaponry as guitars. [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] At Fangorn Forest: Treebeard: I almost feel that I dislike you both, but do not let us be hasty! Turn round! Merry & Pippin turn round Treebeard: Argh! drops the hobbits in his fright [ June 30, 2003: Message edited by: Lily Bombadil ] __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-01-2003, 07:22 AM	#404
Meela Denethor's True Love Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... swoon Posts: 2,049	laughs so much that she collapses and falls apart Oh god, they were the best ever!! hands over a dozen blooper awards and a congratulatory lembas pie __________________ 'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.

07-01-2003, 11:09 AM	#405
Elennar Starfire Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: Nowhere...now here Posts: 952	All the orcs at helms deep are standing around and that old dude shoots one. Instead of falling forward, it falls backward and knocks the next orc down. domino effect for five rows, becuse after that they're all computer animated. the fifth orc falls through the sixth. [img]smilies/tongue.gif[/img] I've already said this, but I want to say it again: computer animation is great. [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img] __________________ Don't let me die!

07-01-2003, 03:15 PM	#406
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Okay, Meela. I've got the Middle-earthen super glue (mud mortar). We will put you back together! (By the way, thanks for the Blooper Award!) Here's another random thought: At Bilbo's party, Frodo sits down beside Sam- Frodo: Go on, Sam! ask Rosie for a dance! Sam: Uhh... I think I'll just have another ale. Frodo: Oh, no you don't! Frodo grabs Sam & shoves him onto the dance "floor". Sam slams into Rosie with such force that he knocks her down. Then... DOMINO HOBBITS! Frodo: Whoa... I am SUPER FRODO!!! Da da da da da da! record shreds Frodo: What??? __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-01-2003, 04:32 PM	#407
Elennar Starfire Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: Nowhere...now here Posts: 952	Gandalf jumps off Orthanc and misses Gwaihir. Saruman looks down and says: "You missed!" The person doing the special voice effects does something wrong in Galadriel's scary scene(In the place of a dark lord, etc) and her voice goes squeaky, so she sounds like she's been breathing helium. __________________ Don't let me die!

07-02-2003, 02:24 AM	#408
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	crud! i tried to reply, and i did it in the wrong place! well, here's my message. [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] me and my sisters make alternate scenes for movies all the time! Like.... (well, i borrowed these from "conan o'brian) (both from lotr2 the movie) Sam: Ugh! There's an orange stink here! Can ya smell it? Frodo: Yes. I can smell it. : [img]smilies/redface.gif[/img]rc comes out of port-a-potti:: Frodo: We're not alone Eomer: I would cut off your head, dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the ground. Legolas: They prefer to be called "little people"!! This one if from the second book. though i can't remember it word for word, i remember my joke fit in perfectly when I was reading the book to my sis. Aragorn: In any case, these woods are perilous, by night or day. ::Aragorn grabs a mike:: ::Gimli gets some shades on and a drum set:: ::Legolas gets his piano:: Aragorn ::singing to the tune of "Night and day":: Night and day! There is danger! Of dwarfs, hobbits and ents, which one is stranger? This is from the first book, near the end, after Celeborn gives them boats for the journey. "Aragorn thanked Celeborn many times....." Aragorn: THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU! ::kisses Celeborn's feet:: Celeborn: Get up, man! You're a Ranger, for goodness sakes! Not to mention, me and my sis like to read a few words from one page, then skip to a random part of the next page, and then skip to the next page, etc etc, seeing if we can make a crazy sentance that is gramatically correct. [img]smilies/smile.gif[/img] it's fun!! __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-02-2003, 02:38 AM	#409
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	OMG! u guys r so funny! lemme see if i can do some more. ::Frodo and Sam walking from the pub:: Hobbit to Rosie: Good night, sweet maiden of the golden ale! Rosie: Okay, Fred. I have told you a hundred times, my name is ROSIE!! Roh-sie! Got it? ::Outside of Moria after Gandalf fell:: ::Frodo in the distance:: Aragorn: Frodo! Frodo: The hell with this! I'm coming, Gandalf!! ::Frodo runs, then leaps off the cliff:: ::after the battle with the wargs:: ::Legolas looks over the cliff Aragorn fell from:: Legolas: He's dead. ::walks away:: ::camera pans down to aragorn hanging on a tree branch:: Aragorn: I'm down here, ya elven idiot! ::In Helm's Deep:: Eowyn: What happened to Aragorn? Gimli: He fell..... Then after getting a little boo-boo, while he tried to get a band-aid for it, he was pulled off the cliff. ::In Helm's Deep, yet again:: ::Gimli blows the horn:: Automated-voice: The horn you are trying to blow is not in service. Please take another breath and try again. ::Gimli tries again:: ::Fart sound:: Aragorn: Gimli! ::holding his nose:: Gimli: It wasn't me! ::sniff:: Oh wait..... It was. I wondered if that pie had beans in it. yeah. i'm cheesy. __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-02-2003, 09:53 AM	#411
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Nureldawen, those were superlative! I haven't laughed that hard since I was a little hobbit, thank you very much. And another Blooper Award is well spent. (Meela, I love your siggy!) I thought of one suddenly! In Rivendell: Boromir: The Shards of Narsil! The blade that cut the Ring from Sauron's hand. cuts finger Waaaa!! My widdle finger!! I wa' my mommy!! Aaaaaaa!! rolls on the floor in a tantrum Aragorn: Awww! It's alright, babe-eeeeee!!! rocks Boromir in his lap Mummy Aragorn is here now. Don't cry, hon-eeeee!! Arwen walks up Arwen: Hem, hem! Aragorn, we've talked about this! I am the mommy and you are the daddy. Aragorn: hands over Boromir Lawks! That was stupid! [img]smilies/eek.gif[/img] __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-02-2003, 03:40 PM	#412
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	that was SO messed up!!!! ::roflmao:: __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-03-2003, 09:42 AM	#413
Gamja Haunting Spirit Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 55	gollum sings in the pond with his fish the fish flies out of Gollum's grasp gollum: oops! Faramir: argh! that's the 3RD, TIME! that's it boys, peg'im. director: sigh cut. in helm's deep Orc: swings sword at haldir but misses and chops his foot off director: cut! take 2. Orc: swings again director: sigh for the last time, cut THIS way, not THAT way. good orc. take 3! Orc: kills haldir director: oh my... NO! THIS-WAY! give me that! like this! whack ow! nosebleed! __________________ "Ni"-the knights who say "Ni!"

07-03-2003, 07:48 PM	#414
legolas luver*1 Animated Skeleton Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Underneath Legolas's bed, poking the mattress, while he's on it. Posts: 36	In Moria Gimli jumps, lands funky& Legolas grabs his beard. Gimli:If I do not make the jump tell my mom my dads wierd.(jumps)Not the beard!(He falls) P.J:Orlando, youre not really suppos to drop him!!!(Orlie holds up a fake beard) O.All right bring in Danny Ddevito. Croud [img]smilies/frown.gif[/img]muttering)Whos Gimli's dad? __________________ O show me the way to go home! I'm tired & I wanna go to bed. I had a little drink about an hour ago & it's gotten right to my head. Wherever I may roam: by land, or sea, or foam, you can find me hear just singin' this song! Show me the way to go home!

07-03-2003, 08:07 PM	#415
legolas luver*1 Animated Skeleton Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Underneath Legolas's bed, poking the mattress, while he's on it. Posts: 36	In Rivendell Boromir [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]ude the Shards of Narsil (he cuts his hand)OW my hand! (cuts himself again)Ow my other hand! (cuts himself again) Ow my spleen!!! [ July 03, 2003: Message edited by: legolas luver1 ] [ July 03, 2003: Message edited by: legolas luver1 ] __________________ O show me the way to go home! I'm tired & I wanna go to bed. I had a little drink about an hour ago & it's gotten right to my head. Wherever I may roam: by land, or sea, or foam, you can find me hear just singin' this song! Show me the way to go home!

07-04-2003, 11:23 AM	#416
Elennar Starfire Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: Nowhere...now here Posts: 952	Treebeard: trips over a tree root Treebeard: Quickbeam! You did that on purpose! I'm telling my mommy! runs off crying __________________ Don't let me die!

07-05-2003, 03:27 PM	#417
Meela Denethor's True Love Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... swoon Posts: 2,049	Shadowfax canters across the plains mtowards Gandalf. Shadowfax rides straight past him. Gandalf: huh... Gandalf turns round and sees a contented Shadowfax eating carrots out of Theoden's hand, while Theoden grins evilly and waves to Gandalf. Theoden: You didn't think I'd let you keep him, did you? OR: Gandalf turns round and sees a contented Shadowfax eating carrots out of Arwen's hand, while Arwen grins evilly and waves to Gandalf. (Heck, she stole Glorfindel's horse... why not make it a hobby?) __________________ 'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.

07-05-2003, 05:12 PM	#418
Gamja Haunting Spirit Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 55	^^^ lol! __________________ "Ni"-the knights who say "Ni!"

07-05-2003, 11:33 PM	#419
Horse-Maiden of the Shire Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Chillaxin' with Glorfindel-441 miles on the RtR Posts: 1,197	I thought of this one. In RotK: Aragorn (to Anduril): You shall not be sheathed again until the last battle is fought. He looks at it fondly, and absentmindedly sheathes it Gandalf: Um...Aragorn... Aragorn: What? Oh, yeah! He hastily takes out Anduril and looks around shifty-eyed, hoping nobody saw __________________ "There's a big...machine in the sky...some kind of electric snake...coming straight at us." "Shoot it," said my attorney. "Not yet...I want to study its habits."

07-08-2003, 11:17 PM	#420
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Sam goes running out into the Anduin. Frodo: Sam, go back! I'm going to Mordor alone! Sam: Of course you are! And I'm going with you! Sam gets out chest deep and suddenly screams Frodo:What? Sam: F-f-f-frodo... IT'S THE LOCH NESS MONSTER!!!!!!!! AAAAARGH!!!!! Sam walks on water getting out of the river & Frodo paddles so fast to the shore that motorboat sounds come from his boat __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-09-2003, 05:18 AM	#421
Everdawn Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: On the sand dunes outside of Ilium, watching it burn. Posts: 1,291	The Uruk-hai marching on Helms Deep, there is a short stand off between the elves and men and the Uruk-hai.. Between them suddenly Leyton Hewitt runs between both of them, tennis racket in hand screaming "C'mon!" before getting very scared and bolting in the poopsite direction, splattering his tennis whites with mud. Elves and Uruk-hai: blink blink Aragorn: I am speechless. Legolas: but you have to admit, he does look great in those tennis whites... Aragorn: rolling eyes Only you could say something like that... __________________ "Athena, stepping up behind him, visible to no one but Achillies, gripped his red-gold hair. Startled he made a half turn, and he knew her upon the instant for Athena." ~The Iliad~ ~My lord, Éomer~

07-09-2003, 02:55 PM	#422
krimaluk Guest Posts: n/a	FOTR: frodo leaps from the hill giigling in rapture..ian forgets his cue and elijah disapears out of sight..suddenly a squeal floats up from the ground.... "AAAAAAARRGGGGHHH!!! i hurt my freakin privates again! geez ian that was the 16th time!" Ian: "giggles..i love doing that scene" not bad for a first shot eh? [img]smilies/rolleyes.gif[/img]

07-09-2003, 03:02 PM	#423
krimaluk Guest Posts: n/a	FOTR: frodo tumbles down the side of the mountain...and keeps on going???!!! PJ: "CUTTTT! viggo! geez? where are you?" looks around a bit and finds aragorn and boromir making out behind a snow man.. PJ stares blankly. VM and SB stare at him with big grins elijah :AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAA*fades into distance

07-09-2003, 03:14 PM	#424
Lëowen Haunting Spirit Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: my computer chair, being smothered by my impossibly large cat Posts: 93	At the very end of TTT (in the book at least): Gandalf and Pippin are riding Shadowfax Pippin: I did not know you rode bare-back, Gandalf. You haven't a saddle or bridle! Gandalf:...You do not ride Shadowfax: he is willing to carry you- or not. If he is willing, that is enough. It is then his business to see that you remain on his back, unless you jump off into the air. Gandalf falls off suddenly Not bad I suppose, for a first try... __________________ Be individual! Join the millions of other people also being individual! Prevent Merry Abuse! Join S.A.M!

07-09-2003, 04:46 PM	#425
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Very good, Leowen! Here's one from Imladris: Arwen: It is mine to give to whom I will. Like my heart. Arwen & Aragorn kiss. Then they start to make out & fall off the footbridge P.J: (exasperatedly) Cut.... __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-09-2003, 11:50 PM	#427
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	that one's more wrong than gimli's striptease! well, i guess not, because ellijah wood without clothes....... ::drools:: [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-10-2003, 12:14 PM	#428
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Hey, atleast it wasn't Sam stripping. I mean, I love the Samster and all, but EEEWW!! Now, Merry has some NICE arm muscles. sigh my darling Frodo clears his throat in the background & I stop daydreaming about other hobbits Hee, hee... This one is more from the FotR book... In Dimrill Dale. Aragorn: wrestling Frodo Lemme SEE IT!! I hafta doctor IT!!! Frodo: No! Aragorn: But it might get infected! Frodo: No! Gimli: He just doesn't want to take his shirt off because knows he's not sexy like me. Legolas: snort Boromir: Ah, he probably doesn't want us to see his bra. Frodo's shirt rips revealing a red silk Demi bra Gimli: chokes on his pipe smoke Legolas: falls off his rock Boromir: I was just kidding! __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-10-2003, 05:23 PM	#430
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	........did.....not.....see......that bra........coming......... __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-11-2003, 09:44 AM	#432
krimaluk Guest Posts: n/a	i can't remeber exact words..but anyway.. TTT (extended edition) legolas reaches down and pull sout lembas bread... "ahh lembas..one bite is enough to fill the stomach of a hungry man takes bite..alas...ear wax..oh sorry wrong movie.." PJ: CUUUUUUUUUUTTTT Harry potter : "COPY CAT!!" [img]smilies/biggrin.gif[/img]

07-11-2003, 10:43 AM	#433
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	FOTR movie: Legolas: It's Lembas. One bite is enough to sustain a grown man. ::takes a bite:: ::Homer-like:: Mmmm! Lembas! TTT book: "Merry and Pippin walked side by side along the Entwash..." ::Merry and Pippin walk side by side... hand in hand.... skipping.... singing "tra-la-la-la-LAAAA!":: [img]smilies/wink.gif[/img] "Where are the horse and the rider? Where is the horn that was sounding?" Rohirrim ::singing to the tune of "where have all the flowers gone?":: : Where have all the riders gone? Long time passing!!!! ROTK book: Mouth of Sauron: It'll take more than a piece of elven glass.... ::looks at phial:: Oooo! Shiny! sry; best i can do with 3 hours sleep! __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-11-2003, 02:25 PM	#434
Lily Bombadil Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hold on...let me consult this broken compass... Posts: 279	Nureldawen, Silmiel, are you two talking about Frodo's Demi Bra? O! That reminds me! I need to give him back that white Deep-plunge bra I borrow from him last week! He needs it for all those low-cut blouses he wears... O! Another blooper was just hatched! Gandalf: I am Gandalf the White! Legolas, Gimli, Aragorn look up. Gandalf is wearing red, sexy, lacy knickers Aragorn: I thought you were Gandalf the White. Gandalf: Oh, I am. These are just the knickers. I, uh, got hot... Legolas: You know, Gandalf, these are pretty nice. Gimli: Where did you get them? Gandalf: Victoria's Secret, of course! Gimli: I knew it! Aragorn: Hey! Those look like some of Arwen's! Gandalf: Of course not! She wears a C cup. I'm an A. However, we did go shopping together. The girl has good taste! Legolas: I'll say. Perhaps she'll let me give her a free fitting... Aragorn: pulls out Anduril Oh, no you don't! Only I'm allowed to fit Arwen! Gimli: Yeah? Well... I fitted Frodo! Gandalf, Legolas, & Aragorn: Urrgh... make faces __________________ "YOU!" "Indeed."

07-11-2003, 04:48 PM	#435
Nureldawen Pile O'Bones Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Sitting on a fencepost, chewin my bubblegum..... ;) Posts: 13	Ugh!!!! Just so wrong! __________________ Two "colorful" pieces of advice; Don't eat yellow snow, and not all that is brown is chocolate.

07-11-2003, 04:51 PM	#437
*The Barrow-Wight* Night In Wight Satin Join Date: May 2000 Posts: 4,043	And with that lovely 'blooper', I will close this already too long thread. __________________ The Barrow-Wight