Defective Weapons Inc.

[The Perky Ent]

Garlic? Are you suggesting something? No, that's a fixed mirror. It's not suppost to show my reflection. just kidding. Sounds funny. I should have posted in that party! Alas. Anyways

Mouth of Sauron: ...I have tokens that I was bidden to show to thee-to thee in especial, if thou shouldst dare to come
*throws down Sam's sword*
Gandalf: Silence!
*throws down grey cloak with elven broach*
Mouth of Sauron: Here's the terms: You get the hobbit
Gandalf: So far so good
Mouth of Sauron: Furthermore, Sauron get's everything east of the Anduin. Henseforth, you will no longer be allowed to kick our butts! Also, Isengard and the Gap of Rohan will be tribute to Sauron. They will be given to a more competent person!
Gandalf: Possibly someone like you?
Mouth of Sauron: Well, I don't mean to brag but-
Gandalf: We will not accept!
*drops mithril vest*
Gandalf: What I meant was, we will not accept refusing your offer. It's a deal.
*As Gandalf and Mouth of Sauron go to shake hands, mithril breaks*
Gandalf: What a minute! This isn't Frodo's mithril vest!
*looks at chains*
Gandalf: Made in Rhûn!?! They only make the cheep stuff! We refuse your offer!

~*~*~*~*~*~

*later that day in Barad-Dûr*
Sauron: So, he didn't accept?
Mouth of Sauron: No master. I think the orcs are right. Maybe we should stop getting stuff from Ebay®
Sauron: Nonsense! Get me my laptop!

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