I smell cheeze.

[The Only Real Estel]

"Great.They have a cave troll." (It seems we have more than one captain obvious...)

Actually I think it only goes "They have a cave troll", but that's not really the point here. I don't mind the line because nobody else knew there was anything out there until they saw the arrows hit the door; and even then I'm sure they just thought there were orcs. So since the majority of the fellowship didn't know the cave troll was about, it couldn't really be an 'obvious' line. I didn't mind it, in case you couldn't tell .

[Boromir88]

I love that line, and it comes from the often witty/satirist Boromir . I can imagine Boromir saying something like that.

"But the enemy holds the eastern bank," objected Boromir. "And even if you pass the Gates of Argonath and come unmolested to the Tindrock, what will you do then? Leap down the Falls and land in the marshes?"

Also, in reply to the Theoden "I know your face." I found that line rather touching, he was just "healed" and then he sees Eowyn, "I know your face." Anyway, maybe I'm biased because I happen to adore Bernard Hill .

[THE Ka]

Lovely line none the less...


*Upon boromir's remark, Legolas reveals that he "can" fly...

L: "Sure you can! Watch meeeeeeeeeeeeee!"


************************************************** ********

Yes, another stupid line from Ka's unlimited imagination...

[Rimbaud]

Talking of cheese: the rearing white horse, with accompanying whinny effect anyone?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

"Hi-ho, Silver!", Rim.

[Elianna]

I find the lines which are *ahem* stolen from Star Wars very cheesy. And what's worse, all the rest of the scene is great.

Éowyn: I'm going to save you.
Théoden: You already have........(And I also think he'll continue) Éowyn, you were right about me. You were right. Tell your brother: you were right.

Haven't figured out what Éowyn'd be right about, but she'd still be right....

[Vanwatholiel]

You guys are so mean! Legolas is not Captain Obvious, and you all really act like it is his fault. If you are trying to blame someone, then blame Peter Jackson! Not the actual character. As if he really has control over his lines in the movie. In the real thing, Legolas is not Mr. Obvious! Instead of trying to talk about someone, try this: your so called "cheezy" lines were cheezy because you put them there. The fact that you chose those lines for this forum makes you cheezy instead! If you are going to talk about Legolas, read the real thing, the book! Then you can determine whether or not he was Mr. Obvious. After all, it was just a movie! Leave Legolas alone! Whew! Now I can breathe. Ok, I'm done yelling.

[The Only Real Estel]

If you are going to talk about Legolas, read the real thing, the book! Then you can determine whether or not he was Mr. Obvious. After all, it was just a movie! Leave Legolas alone! Whew! Now I can breathe

I don't think any of us accuse Legolas of being Cap'n Obvious in the books; just the movies, where his frequent flashes of obviousness have been known to leave me blind for days.

[Boromir88]

If you are going to talk about Legolas, read the real thing, the book!

Been there done that.

Instead of trying to talk about someone, try this: your so called "cheezy" lines were cheezy because you put them there. The fact that you chose those lines for this forum makes you cheezy instead!

This makes absolutely no sense, and before you go on critisizing why don't you read some of my earlier posts, try that....

Edit: I'm sure if I look hard enough I can find corny lines Tolkien has too, in fact I know one.
"Shortcuts make for delays, but inns make for longer ones."
This I find really corny, but that good corny, sort of like your Grandpa's jokes, with that quirky sort of humor. Where "Die Now!," or "A Diversion!," or "I see you!" are just...bad.

Wow, this is the closest I've ever come to giving someone a bad rep. But, I'm a nice guy...maybe too nice.

[Sapphire_Flame]

Originally Posted by Vanwatholiel

You guys are so mean! Legolas is not Captain Obvious, and you all really act like it is his fault. If you are trying to blame someone, then blame Peter Jackson! Not the actual character.

I do blame PJ, for giving a great character such horrid lines. I also blame Orlando, because, even with horribly obvious lines, he could definitely delivered them better. Some of the lines could have been much better had they not been delivered in such a toneless and consistant manner.

In the real thing, Legolas is not Mr. Obvious!

Indeed not. In fact, Book!Legolas is one of my favourite characters.

Instead of trying to talk about someone, try this: your so called "cheezy" lines were cheezy because you put them there. The fact that you chose those lines for this forum makes you cheezy instead!

I agree with Boromir88; that made no sense. What exactly were you trying to say there?

If you are going to talk about Legolas, read the real thing, the book! Then you can determine whether or not he was Mr. Obvious. After all, it was just a movie! Leave Legolas alone!

I've read the books ten times. And, in the books, Legolas has a much more compelling and interesting character. In the movies, however, he gets a very raw deal; he's changed from clever and dynamic to a cardboard-cutout Action Teflon Elf™. Personally, I didn't like the change much. PJ and Orlando both could have done a better job.

Oh, and it's "Captain Obvious", by the way.

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~

[the guy who be short]

your so called "cheezy" lines were cheezy because you put them there

Possibly the "royal you," ie, PJ.

Having complained about all the cheese in LotR, I can't really imagine a cheeseless version...

[Ainaserkewen]

I wasn't aware that this thread was for the discussion of blame. I thought we were just spouting our favourite cheesy lines we love to hate.

frequent flashes of obviousness have been known to leave me blind for days.

The Only Real Estel have you been reading Dilbert lately?
12/06
12/08

It seems to me that perhaps the script was not written specifically for the linguists in the audience. I'm not crazy about the screenplays of the movies, but like I said, we love to hate those cheesy lines.

"We're not alone" and all the other dialog surrounding Frodo and Sam in the beginning of The Two Towers really ran me off that movie. It wasn't the strongest opening, but I've forgiven them.

[Sapphire_Flame]

Oo, thanks for those comics, Aina!

we love to hate those cheesy lines.

Indeed we do. It's the weird little lines that let us have fun with the films. If they were all completely serious and well done, it wouldn't be as amusing to watch. Prime chances to MST!

How about Gollum's song at the exit of Shelob's lair?

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Ainasekewen

I wasn't aware that this thread was for the discussion of blame. I thought we were just spouting our favourite cheesy lines we love to hate.

Quite. This thread is in danger of going up in flames.

If you must discuss so-called "cheesy" lines in the films, then stick to those, rather than getting shirty with one another.

Otherwise I shall take great pleasure in closing this thread.

(Personally, I think that the main lesson of this thread is that one person's "cheeze" is another person's delightful dessert.)

[Elianna]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

(Personally, I think that the main lesson of this thread is that one person's "cheeze" is another person's delightful dessert.)

Yummy, Cheesecake!

[Ainaserkewen]

Yummy, Cheesecake!

Ughh! How did I know that was coming? (I don't like using smilies, so consider this a reminder that I'm only joking around.)

Otherwise I shall take great pleasure in closing this thread.

It's good to know that you take great pleasure in something...

Also The Saucepan Man, good point about the cheese/dessert comment that Elianna liked so much (again, only kidding). Some parts...like for example all the stunts that our beloved Legolas achieves over the course of three movies may make some puke(or worse, flame). But I still love how the music swells and moves to cut time and how everyone in the theater's breath seems to catch and a smile comes to their faces when Legolas slays the oliphaunt/rides down stairs/defies gravity. It's just some of those great movie moments that all action films have, and I'm a sucker for them. But as Ed the Sock would say, "It's still cheesy!"

[Rose Cotton]

Ainaserkewen,The Saucepan Man- I think your both right. For instance I simply love Aragorn's "Let's hunt some orc." But I know quite well that both Tolkien and other people's stomachs are both turning when they hear that line.

There are quite a few lines I find cheesy. Quite a few of them are Gollums. But I think that if I were to state them all I would just be reiterating what other people have put there.


I LOVE CHEESE!!!!

[Sapphire_Flame]

Anyone catch any of the new cheeziness in the EE? Here's the one I liked:

Corsair Captain: You and what army?

Aragorn: This army.

Armies of the Dead: *swoosh*

*headdesk* Lurvely, PJ, really.

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~

[Essex]

I STILL say, (and I seem to be in a minority of one) that Aragorn says Let us hunt some orc. This gives more of an older 'archaic' language to the sentence, and not so modern. And of course, again it 's kind of taken from the books where Aragorn speaks to Eomer

I came out of the North. I am hunting Orcs.

[Boromir88]

Actually Essex, I thought he said that too. "Let us hunt some orc." I'll have to put it on captions next time I view that part. That was the only thing that made me figure out what Eowyn was saying when she was nursing the boy and girl. I slap myself I know it's in the book its, "The wildmen are burning as they go, rick, cot, and tree." To me it sounded like she said "rick caught in a tree." Maybe, I'm just getting old.

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Boromir88

"The wildmen are burning as they go, rick, cot, and tree." To me it sounded like she said "rick caught in a tree." Maybe, I'm just getting old.

You and me both Boro. I always thought that she was referring to someone called Rick Cottontree.

As for Aragorn's line, the script may say "Let us", but I am sure that Viggo says "Let's". Perhaps he just felt more comfortable saying it that way.

[Ainaserkewen]

Corsair Captain: You and what army?

I haven't seen the Extended Edition yet, but good gravy that does sound cheesy!

I was at home all day yesterday and decided to watch Return of the King (the regular) and I noticed something that made me laugh. I'm not sure if it contends with regular cheese, but after the first too movies, it does now.

When Aragorn has just been "sworn in" as king and he's matching around tilting his head to various people he comes across Legolas who's look smashing...they do their manly grip and then he sees Arwen. Now, the Arwen scene is cheesy enough, but Legolas is prettier than Arwen! I doubt that this is just me. But nomatter what anyone else thinks, I think it's cheesy.

[Boromir88]

I laugh when I see that shot where they show Arwen. You see Elrond like prodding her on in the back ground, almost like he's going to cry. His face just reminds me of that saying, where you are on the verge of breaking tears, but holding it back..."that's my special girl."

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

You and me both Boro. I always thought that she was referring to someone called Rick Cottontree.

Add me to that list, Saucie. I spent most of my first few TTT viewing experiences wondering how Eowyn knew some random hobbit with the last name Cottontree, and why the orcs were burning him. Glad to see I'm not the only one.

Haldir's line: "The haaaht of Elven-dum on Uuuth... The home of Cele-booown... and Galad-lee-el... lady of Light."

[THE Ka]

Originally Posted by Sapphire_Flame

Anyone catch any of the new cheeziness in the EE? Here's the one I liked:

Corsair Captain: You and what army?

Aragorn: This army.

Armies of the Dead: *swoosh*

*headdesk* Lurvely, PJ, really.

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~

Ah! Bad memories!

When i heard that i was so ashamed that i put my hood up and pulled the strings ... My poor mother and father (They wanted me to come over and watch it with them...)... especially my mum, because she's never read a single line of the books.I think my dad has read a few, mostly the treebeard chapter which now is why he praises Ents with almost a fetish-like joy...

~Geddish Ka

[Turin]

I think this thread has stated the obvious:

There WAS a reason why Fran Walsh and Phillipa Boyens failed to win an oscar for best script/writing!!!

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Turin

There WAS a reason why Fran Walsh and Phillipa Boyens failed to win an oscar for best script/writing!!!

Given the usual Hollywood approach, surely this was because they retained some of the original lines.

[Essex]

Turin, you may have missed one of the multitude of Oscars ROTK received this year was in fact for Best Adapted Screenplay..........

[Sapphire_Flame]

Originally Posted by Ainaserkewen

When Aragorn has just been "sworn in" as king and he's matching around tilting his head to various people he comes across Legolas who's look smashing...they do their manly grip and then he sees Arwen. Now, the Arwen scene is cheesy enough, but Legolas is prettier than Arwen! I doubt that this is just me. But nomatter what anyone else thinks, I think it's cheesy.

Yeah. I think that could count as cheezy.

Originally Posted by Boromir88

I laugh when I see that shot where they show Arwen. You see Elrond like prodding her on in the back ground, almost like he's going to cry. His face just reminds me of that saying, where you are on the verge of breaking tears, but holding it back..."that's my special girl."

*snicker* Yeah, that was pretty bad. I usually laugh just after that, when Aragorn and Arwen are trying to eat each other.

Here's a little thing I've thought was cheezy. At the exit of Shelob's Lair, when Frodo is caught in the web, Gollum/Smeagol pops up and starts to sing:

Smeagol: Naughty little fly,
Why does it cry?
Caught in a web,
Soon he'll be...

Gollum: Eaten.

*headdesk* That is just a little painful. I mean, really, Gollum had hightailed it out of there as quick as he could. Frodo doesn't even see him again until Mount Doom. Yet, suddenly there he is, singing rhymes bad enough to make Tom Bombadil cringe. Thatta boy. *thwaps PJ*

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~

[Ainaserkewen]

Smeagol: Naughty little fly,
Why does it cry?
Caught in a web,
Soon he'll be...

Gollum: Eaten.

"Oh, you're being so clever Gollum. Better end the movie here, because after that line, how can anyone top that?"

[The Only Real Estel]

[QUOTE]Smeagol: Naughty little fly,
Why does it cry?
Caught in a web,
Soon he'll be...

Gollum: Eaten.[QUOTE]

I don't know, I gues this line might have a little cheese to it, but not an overdose (for a change). Everyone is expecting him to just say 'dead', which is alright, but eaten has a much darker foreboding to it. Eaten implies a longer, more painful, and more terrifying death. He's not just going to be 'dead'...he's going to be eaten.

[Boromir88]

I don't know, I gues this line could be a little cheesy, but I actually liked it.

Some cheesy lines are so cheesy you can't help but laugh, so "cheesy" lines aren't always a negative thing. Think of your grandpa's old jokes.

There's even a few lines in Tolkien that I find rather cheesy (but I laugh when I read them). I would say, there is a funny kind of cheesy lines, and a bad kind that leaves you wondering what the heck?

"Well that settles it, shortcuts make long delays, but inns make longer ones."

[Feanor of the Peredhil]

"What's this... a ranger, caught off his guard?"

[ivo]

The by far cheesiest lines in the whole trilogy are to me the monologue of Sam at the end of TT.

I guess they wanted the audience to leave the cinema with a good feeling. For me it ruins the whole feeling of utter despair (that I felt at this point, reading the books).

[Elianna]

"I am happy for you. He is an honorable man." - Théoden, TTT

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

By the time we get to 10 pages, we should have the entire script here ...

My precition is gradually and scarily coming true ...

Although, I suppose some lines will never feature here, as I trust that you are all checking that those quoted are not attributable originally to Tolkien himself.

You know, some of these are among my favourite lines (and not because I find them humourous in some way). Perhaps I just have a different definition of "cheeze" from everyone else ...

[Turin]

Originally Posted by Essex

Turin, you may have missed one of the multitude of Oscars ROTK received this year was in fact for Best Adapted Screenplay..........

I didn't. There is a difference between adapting the LoTR into cinematic form and actually winning an oscar for having a decent script .

[The Saucepan Man]

Although I believe that book-based adaptations are excluded from the category of best original script ...

[Turin]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

Although I believe that book-based adaptations are excluded from the category of best original script ...

Though Walsh and Boyens still wouldn't have won; not unless Hollywood politics is even worse than I imagined!!

I, in no way, want to sound sexist or chauvinist (honestly) but...

1. I felt that having 2 women predominantly write the script was detriment to the whole Trilogy. I mean (and some have already mentioned these in this thread), there were a lot of (IMO, too many) cheesy lines that had too much femininity about them.

2. Characterisations such as Legolas had a (too) obvious fangirl (no disrespect to fangirls out there ) element to it. I can see that for commercial success you need to have some "glamour" but to that kind of extent?

3. I know that both writers were very inexperienced. Should they have taken such lead roles in creating a decent script for such an important movie? Certainly, some of their "naivity" came out on numerous occasions.

PS

Please don't lambast me for asking these questions. I only want to know if others share similar sentiments.

[Sapphire_Flame]

Why, Turin, all the pessimism of your name seems to have rubbed off on you.

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

You know, some of these are among my favourite lines (and not because I find them humourous in some way). Perhaps I just have a different definition of "cheeze" from everyone else ...

Ditto that. In fact, Boromir's cave troll line is one of my favourite lines in the films. Cheeze varies from person to person, evidently.

Abedithon le,

~ Saphy ~