Tol-in-Gaurhoth XV-The Villagers Strike Back!

[The Saucepan Man]

**GRRRRRRROOOOWWWWWLLLLL!!!**

Be afraid! Be very afraid! For the Big Bad Wolf is here ...

Contrary to Mannish folklore, Villagers have much to fear for me. For I am admirably equipped with huff and suitably arrayed with puff, and I have more than enough to blow their houses down.

Heroes, eh? Why, let us have some sport with them. Let us hunt them down and tear them limb from limb. Let us search them out and devour them 'til nothing be left of them. We have nothing to fear from them, for they are cowardly fools who dare only to strike during the day, while we sleep. They can be no match for a group of fine Wolves such as us (well, most of us). So let us avenge the death of our fallen comrade, Anguirel.

I say that, in fine Wolvish tradition, we pick on the weakest among us first. So that would be:

Eomer, a paltry Warg.
Kitanna, a mere Beta Wolf
Oddwen, yet but a whelp
and
Kath, a useless runt.

What say you, fellow beasts?

Originally Posted by the pathetic Warg

Now, who among you wolves is willing to hunt down these Elves and show them no mercy

Now, how'd you know that they're Elves, eh?

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Glirdan

Or is it a cover for a hairy little secret she has.

Surely you mean a hairless little secret? Or are you more used to hunting Wolves than trying to be one ...?

[Glirdan]

The first one. (I'm so used to saying hairy!! I'll have to get used to changing it.) I meant hairless, yes.

[Gurthang]

Well, whatever we decided to do, let's do it and get somebody dead! I'm a bit hungry, so the longer we wait the madder I'll be. True, Anguirel's body is right there and no one's taken to it, yet he was a rather old fart and so his meat isn't tender like I love.

Also, I say we look at our Big Bad Puffing Saucepan Wolf. Or maybe I should be saying Saucepan Man! Really, as long as I've ever heard of him, he's been a blooming innocent man every stinkin' time. I'm not so sure his heart has turned as black as we would want! I say he's still a villager, even if the odds have changed a bit!

But I do like the idea of killing them youngsters. They've got to be very tender indeed! Although, I do have to admit that Oddwen's a bloodthirsty fiend after my own death-loving heart. I'd keep her for now, but if my choice was to be made on the spot, I'd choose that little runt, Kath.

Ah, but my memory tingles! I seem to remember Nonnacedak somehow never being around for a kill, yet always showing up for a piece of the meat! That's foul and even by a wolfish standard! I say out with thieving scavenger!

[Meneltarmacil]

Grrrrrrrrrrr, I say we ought to look at Nonnacedak, our Scavenger. He seems to be enjoying his meal. Perhaps he invited these heroes in so he could have more dead meat to eat...

But I really don't care what you think. I'll make my own plans, being a Lone Wolf and all.

[The Saucepan Man]

Originally Posted by Gurthang

Also, I say we look at our Big Bad Puffing Saucepan Wolf. Or maybe I should be saying Saucepan Man!

Fine words, my friend, but mayhaps dissembling ones, coming from one named after a sword wielded by a Mannish Hero! Or should we look at your chosen name. What Wolf chooses to name himself in the cursed Elven tongue?

Perhaps there is more to you, Gil-Gurth, than meets the eye ...

[Gurthang]

Originally Posted by The Saucepan Man

Fine words, my friend, but mayhaps dissembling ones, coming from one named after a sword wielded by a Mannish Hero! Or should we look at your chosen name. What Wolf chooses to name himself in the cursed Elven tongue?

I chose...! Surely you remember that our names are given by either what we do, an aspect of our being, or by our lord, Sauron. Mine is the latter. As to the bizarre elvish twist it puts to your tongue, I do not know, but I for one would not be questioning Lord Sauron's choice. I hear that he walks among us even now! Yes, he's here to counter these oddly deceitful heroes, so I'd not be talking so much about the Dark Lord and his choices if I were you.

[Oddwen]

Originally Posted by G-g-g-g-g!

As to the bizarre elvish twist it puts to your tongue, I do not know, but I for one would not be questioning Lord Sauron's choice.

Sounds like an elvish plot to me...I say our Exorcist should get to work, and see if he can't expel these blasted heroes! And if he can't, I say we EAT him!

Or "Lobo" there...did Sauron give you that name too? Sounds like some cursed domesticated name...you probably eat your food out of a bowl!

*growls*

[mormegil]

Dark Lord? What has that prat done for us lately? Garn! I'll tell you what all he's fed us is lousy orc-meat! That don't sit too well in my gut but maybe for those who dont' care what they eat it's okay. Glirdan our butcher doesn't seem to mind what meat he serves us up. Now I've got some advice for all you young runts that don't know your fangs from your claws. We better watch those that are attempting to blend in well, like Glirdan he seems to be agreeing with everybody's suspciion. First he follows my poke at our resident mutant hyena aka Warg. Then the little maggot eater goes and agrees with Oddwen. Look at the filthy Gurthang fellow, jumps on our scavenger after Menetarmacil does. Our scavernger don't bother me none, why he's one of the few that doesn't get in my way while I'm trying to have a good eat.

[Mithalwen]

Well sweeties, I have been listening to what you have had to say since poor darling Anguirel was slain, and here are my observations.

I have noticed that sometimes novice wolves we have sent into villages make the mistake of speaking too much too soon & being too effusive in praise of the dead. Now Anguirel was a fine figure of a wolf and I shall miss him but I very much doubt he spent much time chasing fairies .... That was really not his style. So what was the point of Wayne's post. But Wayne is Wayne and unpredictable.

I find it a little odd that the first three to speak all accuse Eomer to some extent. Too crude to think that three little heroes were sticking their necks out in a row but I wouln't be surprised if one of them was not so furry as they like to seem. Interesting though how when they speak again - having all spoken against Eomer they start to turn on each other.

Mormegil speaks against Glirdan. Glirdan against Wayne. In some ways that might be seen as natural wolf behaviour but in the light of the early mini band-wagon, I have my doubts.

Oddwen's post is insubstantial and merely echoes the already voiced suspicions of Wayne and the Warg.

Eomer deflects accusations but only Gurthang of those who have barked so far has not named him as a suspect. While I hold that this pack should be welcoming of those of other cultures who seek sanctuary in our land the sole condition is that they must be wolfish through and through.

Which brings me to the Big Bad Saucepanwolf. I note that while he picked up on Glirdan's slip he made an interesting one of his own.

"Villagers have much to fear for me". Shouldn't that be from? Or is it that your fellow villages fear for your hame - or perhaps your skin? Anguirel's death creates a vacancy... maybe you think you will now be the biggest beast in this forest.

Well I think that will do for now. Time for a tincture, kitten's blood on the rocks methinks. See you later darlings...

[Mithalwen]

NB Cross posted with Menelmatarcil, Oddwen, morm, SPM,Gurthang... not in that order.....