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04-21-2007, 11:35 AM
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#1 | |
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Princess of Skwerlz
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: where the Sea is eastwards (WtR: 6060 miles)
Posts: 7,500
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Quote:
How many monsters does it take to eat all the critics?
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'Mercy!' cried Gandalf. 'If the giving of information is to be the cure of your inquisitiveness, I shall spend all the rest of my days in answering you. What more do you want to know?' 'The whole history of Middle-earth...' |
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04-21-2007, 11:39 AM
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#2 |
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Silver in My Silent Heart
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: the great beauty
Posts: 1,611
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How many monsters does it take to eat all the critics?
Hey! They wouldn't go as far as cannibalism!  How many fish did Gollum eat under the Misty Mountains? |
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04-21-2007, 11:43 AM
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#3 |
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Itinerant Songster
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: The Edge of Faerie
Posts: 7,066
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How many fish did Gollum eat under the Misty Mountains?
That's easy, one for every Tolkienbashing review ever written. Let's have another go at this one: How many monsters does it take to eat all the critics? 
Last edited by littlemanpoet; 04-21-2007 at 11:47 AM. |
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04-21-2007, 11:53 AM
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#4 |
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Silver in My Silent Heart
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: the great beauty
Posts: 1,611
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So here you go!
 How many monsters does it take to eat all the critics? Depends on the levels. A 20 level monster can eat 56,8 level 5 critics, but the ratio critically changes if the critics have a +3 reputation bonus. How many critics does it take to avoid being eaten by the monsters? |
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04-21-2007, 09:05 PM
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#5 |
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Itinerant Songster
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: The Edge of Faerie
Posts: 7,066
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How many critics does it take to avoid being eaten by the monsters?
Two. The first critic feeds the brain of the second critic to a monster; the monster is sickened by the repugnance of the thoughts in the critic's brain, and loses its lunch. Word gets out to all the other monsters and the critics are safe..... (blast it) ..... to continue their Tolkienbashing. How many posthumous volumes of original Tolkien material does it take to satisfy the voracious appetites of Tolkien fanatics? |
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04-22-2007, 02:02 AM
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#6 |
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Guard of the Citadel
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxon
Posts: 2,205
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x → ∞
How many ages does it take to get an Elf bored?
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“The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.”
Delos B. McKown |
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04-22-2007, 06:56 AM
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#7 | |
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A Voice That Gainsayeth
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: In that far land beyond the Sea
Posts: 7,431
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Quote:
How many Hobbits does it take to drink up the whole Green Dragon?
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"Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories |
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