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Old 11-15-2005, 02:34 PM   #8361
Maeggaladiel
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Denny: What are you boys doing out here at this hour?

Far: Sheez! Nothing!

Bor: You're totally cramping our style, old man!

Denny: You've been hanging out with those Osgilliath boys again, haven't you?!
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Old 11-15-2005, 03:59 PM   #8362
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Pipe

Denethor: "Whazzup homeboys? Chillin' in your crib or just hangin' on the down low? I'll have you know I ain't no fresh turkey I been cruisin' on the curb longer than you been crackin' on the lackin' and I know it's all about the blanky blanky."

Faramir and Boromir:
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Old 11-15-2005, 04:25 PM   #8363
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Denethor: Here you are! I just realized, it's no idea to fight any more. We should...

Faramir: Ehhh, daddy? Could you...

Denethor: Don't interupt you worthless excuse for a son! Why aren't you more like your brother? Now listen, if we abandon our posts now and create...

Boromir: *HRM* Father, I acually think you should...

Denethor: YOU TOO? Now, what could be more important than...

Boromir: But... (*CLONK* Denethor falls to the ground).....I just wanted to say that Gandalf stands behind with his staff, and he's not afraid too use it

OR

Boromir was disgusted to find his father roaming the citadel only wearing his nightgown. For the 7th time!

OR

D: Behold, the Dark Lord, King of all men and ruler of the world! I aaam the Greatest!

B
: No your not! And the outfit is ridiculous!

F: Been looking in that Seeing Stone again, have you? Come here, I'll take care of you.
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Old 11-15-2005, 05:25 PM   #8364
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Faramir: "Oh Dad! Great timing! We were just going over a last minute switch-er-roo in the dance routine. Tell me what you think of doing, "bump, bump, slide, scuff, slide, scuff, twirl and bump; instead of the same ole bump, bump, slide, slide, twirl bit. Oh yeah, what about doing "jazzy hands" during the slide, scuff, slide, scuff part? Huh, Dad, huh??? Whadda think???
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Old 11-15-2005, 05:57 PM   #8365
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Boromir: "Yeah, so then I'm like, I'll be your Gondorian Knight In Shining Armour, and she's all like --uh, oops. Hey Dad."
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Old 11-15-2005, 06:00 PM   #8366
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Eye

Quote:
Originally Posted by luthien-elvenprincess
Faramir: "Oh Dad! Great timing! We were just going over a last minute switch-er-roo in the dance routine. Tell me what you think of doing, "bump, bump, slide, scuff, slide, scuff, twirl and bump; instead of the same ole bump, bump, slide, slide, twirl bit. Oh yeah, what about doing "jazzy hands" during the slide, scuff, slide, scuff part? Huh, Dad, huh??? Whadda think???
Denethor: What are you boys doing now?

Boromir: [hastily hides controller behind back] Uh... nothing, Dad.

Denethor: Is that DDR?!?

Faramir: Um... no....

Denethor: [turns purple] You boys are playing Disco Disco Revolutions behind my back again?!? That's it--you're both grounded!
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Old 11-15-2005, 09:36 PM   #8367
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Boromir: "Me, trying to impersonate the Vice-President, don't be silly!"
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Old 11-16-2005, 01:07 AM   #8368
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Thumbs up

Faramir: Look, father, you're not Gandalf, so the uncloaking just isn't funny!

Denethor: Is that why I'm being replaced?

Boromir: YES!



Orcs discover the wonders of soap!

OR

Frodo: I would like two Barad-dur burgers, two large fries, a coke and a happy meal for Sam.

Sam: Erm, Mr. Frodo that's not a Hornburger store it’s just an Orc... What do you mean, Happy Meal?
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Old 11-16-2005, 01:50 AM   #8369
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Leaf 'Do you feel that, Sam?'

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Old 11-16-2005, 02:02 AM   #8370
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Frodo: "I think they're making fun of us."
Sam: "I've never seen anyone laugh 'til they threw up."

OR

Sam: "What do you mean our outfits are out of season?"

OR

Frodo(dull monotone): "Oh, look. It's Gandalf."
Sam(dull monotone): "Oh, and he's uncloaking."
Frodo(dull monotone): "I am sooo surprised."
Sam(dull monotone): "Yeah... I am in shock."

OR

Frodo's hair suddenly awakens and begins to groggily look around.
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Old 11-16-2005, 03:24 AM   #8371
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Silmaril

The captured 'spies' were punished by having to work as mannequins at Sauron's clothing shop.
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Old 11-16-2005, 04:09 AM   #8372
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Leaf LR alternate ending #1049

It was a bad day for Middle-earth when Frodo and Sam realised that the lands beyond Cirith Ungol was not actually Mordor . . .

Sam: Stupid MapQuest . . .
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Old 11-16-2005, 05:26 AM   #8373
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White Tree

Frodo: The Holy Grail lies in the Castle Augggghh. What's that mean?

Sam: I think that means we're on the wrong set.

OR

Frodo just found out Sam switched his Strawberry Shampoo, from the Woodland Realm, with Pink Pepto Bismol.
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Old 11-16-2005, 05:46 AM   #8374
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White Tree

Little do they know that they have just disguised themselves in the traditional garb of elderly Orc women.
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2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard.
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Old 11-16-2005, 09:00 AM   #8375
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Sam and Frodo wait for the announcement of the lottery.

Orc Overlord: And the winner of the tram ride up Mt. Doom is Skaishásh the Bloody-handed

Frodo: Dang! I was really hoping to win that tram ride.

Sam: I'll be your tram, Mister Frodo.
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Old 11-16-2005, 09:31 AM   #8376
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Pipe

Frodo did not find his role as the Thanksgiving Turkey in his high school play amusing.
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Old 11-16-2005, 09:41 AM   #8377
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Shield

Sam: "You look mighty attentive today, Mr. Frodo."

Frodo: "Yes. I've set a bear trap over yonder and I'm watching to see if Gandalf gets caught in it."

Sam: "You're one sick son-of-a-gun, Mr. Frodo."

Frodo: "I sure am."
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Old 11-16-2005, 10:14 AM   #8378
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Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.Kath is battling Black Riders on Weathertop.
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Frodo and Sam catch sight of themselves in a mirror.
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Old 11-16-2005, 10:27 AM   #8379
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After losing the One Ring in a gamble with Gorbag, Frodo had to admit Sam was right. He was a compulsive gambler who made stupid bets.
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Old 11-16-2005, 11:16 AM   #8380
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Sam: Alright Mister Kurum, tell us where we can find some orkish bri'ches or I'll get Frodo here to whine, complain, and angst at you.
Frodo: He isn't kidding, either.

OR

Frodo: "Do you hear the people sing? Singing the song of angry men! Its a music of a people who will not be slaves again!..."
Sam: ...Bless me, I think you need to take a rest, Mister Frodo. I don't hear anything.

OR

Unbeknownst to the rest of the Fellowship Sam and Frodo were keeping tally of just how many orcs Gimli and Legolas slaughters in Pelennor Fields.
Sam: Seven hundred fifty eight...
Frodo: ...Legolas is still at nineteen...
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Old 11-16-2005, 12:33 PM   #8381
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The moment when Sam and Frodo realized that apparently there wasn't such a thing as Dress-down Friday in Gondor.
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Old 11-16-2005, 02:26 PM   #8382
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Pipe

Innocent villagers Frodo and Sam stand sullenly by and watch the remaining wolves do their taunting, over-the-top victory dance...a precursory to dinner.

-or-

Frodo was not impressed by the orc's "receding hairline" joke.
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Old 11-16-2005, 02:44 PM   #8383
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Frodo: I will go all the way! Nothing can stop me!

Sam: Yes, and I will go with you. Till the bitter end. We will reach the final and win the M-E football tournament! GO SHIRE!

OR

Sam: Please, just talk to me!

Frodo: .......

Sam: Come on! I can't help I got elven ears!

Frodo: If you don't tell me where you got those, you and I are finished.
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Old 11-16-2005, 05:42 PM   #8384
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Frodo and Sam were filled with concern as they realized that the fabled Orcian Census Ritual that involved counting tattooed buttocks was no fable. In fact, the revealing ritual was in full swing right before their unbelieving eyes and the census board was headed their way!

(They hadn't realized how close they were to the Crack of Doom!)
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Last edited by luthien-elvenprincess; 11-16-2005 at 08:49 PM.
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Old 11-16-2005, 06:09 PM   #8385
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beanamir of Gondor
Denethor: What are you boys doing now?

Boromir: [hastily hides controller behind back] Uh... nothing, Dad.

Denethor: Is that DDR?!?

Faramir: Um... no....

Denethor: [turns purple] You boys are playing Disco Disco Revolutions behind my back again?!? That's it--you're both grounded!
Ha! Never shall I read "DDR" the same way again!
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Old 11-16-2005, 06:14 PM   #8386
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Frodo: well that didn't work...

Sam: yep...what if we built a giant wooden badger!
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Old 11-16-2005, 06:53 PM   #8387
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Frodo and Sam listen as Marc Antony gives his funeral oration for Julius Caesar.
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Old 11-16-2005, 07:00 PM   #8388
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Sam: Two days ago, I saw a rig that can haul that tanker of yours. You want to get out of here, you talk to me...

Frodo: That's right, partner! You and me together, all the way!

With apologies to anyone born after 1970 and thus probably completely incapable of getting the joke...
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Old 11-16-2005, 07:08 PM   #8389
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Pipe

The esteemed Fordim Hedgethistle (offcamera): "So, Sam, Frodo, what do you guys think? Is Eru God?"

Frodo and Sam: "Uh..."
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Old 11-16-2005, 09:51 PM   #8390
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To appease the current appetite for hobbit boy bands amoungst young orcs everywhere, low bugit magazines would commonly rent out Sauron's collection of hobbit prisoner cardboard cut-outs...

~ Ka
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í endaleysu tokuni?
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Old 11-16-2005, 10:12 PM   #8391
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Sam: You're right Mr. Frodo, I am getting chaffed.
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Old 11-16-2005, 11:40 PM   #8392
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The Eye Lookie, it's Samwise Neill!

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Old 11-16-2005, 11:49 PM   #8393
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Frodo: "And now that I see him I do pity him."
Sam: "Now, that's no way to talk about our Director!"

OR

Sam: "I didn't know Cirith Ungol got cable!"

OR

Arwen must be walking by.
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Old 11-17-2005, 12:53 AM   #8394
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

The Hobbits just didn't get Orc comedian's jokes.

OR

Unfortunately, it seems that Frodo had put on the armour of the Mouth of Sauron's dentist and so had to do his duties.
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 11-17-2005, 03:02 AM   #8395
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Silmaril

Sam and Frodo didn't exactly appreciate the "You look fat" comment.
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Old 11-17-2005, 07:24 AM   #8396
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Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.Boromir88 is wading through the Dead Marshes.
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White Tree

Frodo: He insulted my mother!

Sam: Hey, you take that back, only I can insult Mr. Frodo's mother.
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Old 11-17-2005, 10:51 AM   #8397
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Boots

Frodo and Sam soon discovered that the reality of being a soldier in Mordor's army was somewhat less attractive than the recruitment poster had promised.
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Old 11-17-2005, 11:54 AM   #8398
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Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Hookbill the Goomba is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
Thumbs up

Watching Orcs eat was never pleasant. Watching Orcs eat each other was surprisingly entertaining though.

OR

Frodo: I don’t care how much you pay me, I am not uncloaking! Who do you think I am? Gandalf?
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THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...
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Old 11-17-2005, 02:36 PM   #8399
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Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.Mithalwen is lost in the dark paths of Moria.
As of 21st December.......

A solemn moment as Sam and Frodo prepare to exchange their vows in their themed Civil Partnership ceremony.....
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Old 11-17-2005, 02:46 PM   #8400
Eomer of the Rohirrim
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Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.Eomer of the Rohirrim is a guest at the Prancing Pony.
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