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Visit The *EVEN NEWER* Barrow-Downs Photo Page |
06-09-2006, 10:50 AM
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#10881 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Caption time...
This was the last time Elrond let Arwen do his hair. OR Arwen: Where’d my book go? Elrond: And I paid all that money for your education?
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 06-09-2006 at 11:46 AM. |
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06-09-2006, 10:57 AM
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#10882 |
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Child of the West
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn
Posts: 2,132
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Elrond: Arwen, aren't you a little old for Green Eggs and Ham?
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"Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain |
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06-09-2006, 11:08 AM
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#10883 |
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Laconic Loreman
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 7,507
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Elrond: Is that blood on your hands?
Arwen: For the last time I did not do anything to Glorfindel!
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Fenris Penguin
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06-09-2006, 11:43 AM
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#10884 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,449
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Elrond tried to supress a smirk, he had tried to warn Arwen what would happen if she let Changing Rooms do a make over but would she listen..
With admirable sangfroid, Elrond maintains his composure as the man lurking in the curtains sticks his hand up his skirt....
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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06-09-2006, 11:51 AM
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#10885 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,637
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A bad enough pun for a neg rep.
Arwen: Father is Varda unpopular and boring?
Elrond: Why do you ask? Arwen: Well all the stars are 'Square' 
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke |
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06-09-2006, 01:07 PM
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#10886 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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Arwen: Oh pleeeaase...
Elrond: No Arwen, you may not do coloring in until your room is tidy. And look at all that crayon on your hands! Or While Arwen distracts Elrond with her coloring book, Elrohir quietly destroys that hideous grey dressing gown he refused to throw out.
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. Last edited by Meela; 06-09-2006 at 01:15 PM. |
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06-09-2006, 01:39 PM
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#10887 |
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Laconic Loreman
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 7,507
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Elrond: Aren't you a little too old to still want to be read bed-time stories?
OR... Elrond: Wait a second...Intro to Gondorian Politics...this isn't your book. Has that blasted Ranger boy been back after I forbade you from seeing him? Arwen: I swear ada, there has been no one hiding in this room, especially not behind the curtains.
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Fenris Penguin
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06-09-2006, 01:53 PM
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#10888 |
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Drummer in the Deep
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Next Sunday A.D.
Posts: 2,126
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Playing off of Morm -
Elrond: Dear, we really need to stop reading bed-time stories. You are old enough and I'm not sure that Aragorn will continue. Arwen: Oh, he does....oops. Elrond: AND HOW WOULD YOU KNOW THAT, YOUNG LADY? Or... Elrond: And that constellation is the big dipper. Or... Elrond: And that constellation is the big dipper. Hey, wait...computer! The holodeck is malfuncitoning again! Or... Elrond: In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some...EEEEEE! Someone's got a cold hand! Or... Elrond: So is this what you call...a book? Or... Look, behind the curtains! It's the return of Steve, the squid from 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea!!
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But all the while I sit and think of times there were before
I listen for returning feet and voices at the door Last edited by Oddwen; 06-09-2006 at 02:07 PM. Reason: Some unwanted coding |
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06-09-2006, 02:05 PM
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#10889 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Arwen: Father, why is that man holding flowers near your bottom?
Elrond: That meat you cooked last night was off, and I have a bad case of wind, that's why people call you Arwen Undomesticated.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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06-09-2006, 02:26 PM
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#10890 |
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Cryptic Aura
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 5,989
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Arwen: But of all things, Dad, a mullet?
Elrond: My dear Arwen, it is but a part mullet. The business in the front is receding.
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I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away. |
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06-09-2006, 03:46 PM
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#10891 |
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Energetic Essence
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Where Lark Nor Eagle Ever Flew
Posts: 3,285
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Arwen: But Daaad!!
Elrond: If I've I told you once, I've told you a thousand times! You are NOT trying out for the role of Cyndi in Scary Movie 1 and I will NOT help you practice by being the murderer!! or Arwen: Dad? Was Legolas fixing up your hair again? or even Arwen: Dad? Was Legolas fixing up your hare again? or even more Elrond: You didn't hit a single note on cue OR on key! You're fired! or again Man 'holding' the flowers: Will you marry me? Arwen: YES!!! Elrond: NO! Wait...was that even a part of the script!?!? 
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I'm going to buy you a kitty, I'm going to let you fall in love with the kitty, and one cold, winter night, I'm going to steal into your house and punch you in the face! Fenris Wolf
Last edited by Glirdan; 06-11-2006 at 10:18 AM. |
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06-10-2006, 03:14 AM
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#10892 |
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Shade of Carn Dûm
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Stuck under a rock in Valinor with Ar-Pharazon.
Posts: 480
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Elrond uselessly attempts to get Arwen to sleep with a bed-time story, Aragorn comes home in 20 minutes (and he's wearing that special perfume), completely unaware that Aragorn, lurking behind the curtains, is going to ALL lengths to incapacitate him.
OR Arwen: Father, why are you so grumpy looking all the time these days? Ever since that party with Galadriel in Third Age 1042, I mean, what happened? Elrond: (groan) Lets just say the water from her mirror and a Vodka Cruiser don't mix, ooooohhhh (holds stomach) OR Elrond: That's it young lady, I told you to stay away from that Ranger, now take your punishment! A half-hour reading from the Poems of Ted Sandyman!! Arwen: NOOOOO! OR Arwen: *sigh* I wish Aragorn was home, father's readings always make me so glassy-eyed... and that wall in the background, what was wrong with SHOWING the stars, instead of painting them on the wallpaper! |
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06-10-2006, 06:26 AM
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#10893 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Elrond flips through a wallpaper sampler book...
Elrond: "What do you think, daughter: The flowers or the leaves?" Arwen: "Frankly father, I don't care. Anything's better than this horrid blue with random white spots!"
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06-10-2006, 08:03 AM
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#10894 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Arwen is holding a sleeping bag as she tells her father: If you don't get this room re-decorated, then I am sleeping under the constelation of Menofmacoroni and Squarespagetti.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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06-10-2006, 11:28 AM
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#10895 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Elrond: This is utter dribble! Mindless blabber and silly statements that mean nothing. What is this rubbish?
Arwen: My diary. OR Elrond: Okay... Aha... Ummm... yes... of course... Arwen: Father, I stopped talking five minuets ago... Elrond: Hmmm... yes... Indeed...
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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06-10-2006, 01:06 PM
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#10896 |
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A Mere Boggart
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: under the bed
Posts: 4,737
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Elrond is about to find out that the book he has just taken from Arwen and Aragorn is titled 1001 Ways to Give A Wedgie.
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Gordon's alive!
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06-11-2006, 05:18 AM
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#10897 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Elrond: This book is dull, boring and tedious, it has no imagination, lacks depth and has no credible storyline, what did you say the name of the author was?
Arwen: Germaine Greer.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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06-11-2006, 06:43 AM
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#10898 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Elrond: Ring of Aoom, Ring of Boom, Ring of Coom, Ring of Doom, Ring of...
Arwen: That was it! Go back! Elrond:... Ring of Eoom, Ring of foom. Nope, not in here. I afraid Aragorn was lying to you. You'll have to go to Valinor now. Or Awen is shocked as her father discovers the hollowed out book... Elrond: So, this is where you've been hiding the Bacon!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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06-11-2006, 09:39 AM
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#10899 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,637
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Arwen sits down as Elrond prepares to give his 'birds and bees' talk.
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke |
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06-11-2006, 10:30 AM
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#10900 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,449
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It was pointless trying to get Elrond to listen when he was reading the sport section of the Eriador Telegraph....
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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06-11-2006, 11:06 AM
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#10901 |
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Cryptic Aura
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 5,989
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Hugo wonders whether he should take his cue from Nigel Hawthorne's Archdeacon Grantly in the Barchester Chronicles or from Alan Rickman's Obadiah Slope while Liv with resignation contemplates her Eleanor Harding-Bold role.
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I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away. |
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06-11-2006, 08:55 PM
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#10902 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Elrond: "My goodness how fasinating! I never knew all this about history. Thank goodness for this book, what'd you say it was? The DaVinci Code? I'll have to tell my friends about this..."
Arwen: "Uh, Dad. It's fiction." |
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06-11-2006, 09:49 PM
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#10903 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: As with the flygja
Posts: 1,403
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Once again, An Idiot's Guide to Parenting outside the Elvenhome failed for Elrond...
E: Well, at least you don't have six sisters and i'm silmaril crazy... A: Yeah, and you think healing hobbits is Biography Channel worthy... E: Young lady, if you don't (pauses to look in book) stop right now, I'll make you take an oath for an obviously doomed task! ~ Aesthete
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Vinur, vinur skilur tú meg? Veitst tú ongan loyniveg? Hevur tú reikað líka sum eg, í endaleysu tokuni? |
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06-11-2006, 10:13 PM
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#10904 |
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Maundering Mage
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,637
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 Sam: Mr. Frodo, he calls himself The Ghost of Christmas Past. or Andy: See! Frodo's got it! This is the way you use a 'natural' toilet. Frodo: Ummmm...Guys!?!? or Bringing a gardner along on adventures could be a bit tiresome... Sam: Ohhh look at this plant, and that one, oh I especially love this one!
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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke |
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06-11-2006, 11:47 PM
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#10905 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Muddy-earth
Posts: 1,297
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Sam; It's alright Mr Frodo I got him. Ok you sneaking thief, what have you done with the real Gollum, and what's more where have you hidden Mr Frodo's legs?
or C'mon you, we got enough with that damn Wizard always uncloaking, we aint gonna stand for it from a stand in.
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[B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER. |
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06-12-2006, 02:03 AM
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#10906 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Quicksand is always dangerous...
Andy: Look; if he struggles it will just make it worse! Sean: No! You need to slowly squirm out! Elijah: Erm... I'm still sinking! OR Sam: Look, sir, that spandex is so 30 years ago!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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06-12-2006, 05:37 AM
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#10907 |
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Energetic Essence
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Where Lark Nor Eagle Ever Flew
Posts: 3,285
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Hide and Seek in...THE DEAD MARCHES!!
Andy: See Sean! Told you I'd find him!
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I'm going to buy you a kitty, I'm going to let you fall in love with the kitty, and one cold, winter night, I'm going to steal into your house and punch you in the face! Fenris Wolf
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06-12-2006, 02:44 PM
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#10908 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,449
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Frodo and Sam may have had elven cloaks but Gollum had DAMART ....
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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06-12-2006, 03:47 PM
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#10909 |
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Sword of Spirit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Oh, I'm around.
Posts: 1,401
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Sam: "Hey, Frodo, this guys says he's from a drifter indention."
Guy: "No, I said 'a different dimension!'" Sam: "Whatever. Anyway, he says he lives in union crates!" Guy: "No! I'm from the United States!"  Sam: "Right, if you say so. Well, he said he'll go for our order."Frodo: "Oh, you're gonna pick up our pizza?" Guy: "ACK! No, I said I 'know about Mordor!' Ah, screw it; I'm outta here." *Guy jumps through trans-dimensional rift.Frodo: "I hope he hurries; I'm starving."
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I'm on a Mission from God. |
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06-12-2006, 04:18 PM
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#10910 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Virginia.
Posts: 952
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Andy Serkis teaches Frodo and Sam about wild edible plants.
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Fenris Wolf: WW LXXX. |
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06-13-2006, 05:44 AM
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#10911 |
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Denethor's True Love
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Mirkwood. With Thranduil... *swoon*
Posts: 2,049
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The White Rabbit lures yet more unsuspecting passers-by into Wonderland...
Gollum-Rabbit: What d'you mean, you can't fit down the hole? Sheesh, I never had this much trouble with Alice...
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'The Hobbit' 1st impressions: 1. Thorin is hot... Oh god, I fancy a dwarf. 2. Thranduil is hotter. 3. Is that... Figwit! 4. Does Elijah Wood never age? 2nd: It's all about Fili & Kili, really. 3rd: BARD! OMG, Bard. |
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06-13-2006, 05:47 AM
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#10912 |
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Wight
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Green Hill Country
Posts: 196
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Wrong Guide Through the Dead Marshes
Frodo: "Look, Sam. He hasn't a clue about how to get through these marshes. As I told you when we took up with him, pull off the wig. Even you will be able to see it's Mr. Clean!"
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Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise can not see all ends. |
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06-13-2006, 06:00 AM
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#10913 |
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Scion of The Faithful
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines]
Posts: 5,312
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Lost?
Mr. Serkis: Hello! Can you direct me to the next inter-dimensional rift?
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フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...
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06-13-2006, 10:28 AM
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#10914 |
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Alive without breath
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla
Posts: 5,912
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Andy wakes up (still in his pyjamas) and realises that the Hobbits have literally eaten him out of house and home!
OR Sam: What have I told you about trying to steal Mr Frodo's money? I've told you a million times he's broke. Frodo: Hay! I resent that!
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I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... |
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06-13-2006, 11:57 AM
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#10915 |
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Everlasting Whiteness
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Perusing the laminated book of dreams
Posts: 4,533
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Ah, ATM
Frodo: Sam! Get away from that anakronism!
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“If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.” |
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06-13-2006, 12:13 PM
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#10916 |
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Pilgrim Soul
Join Date: May 2004
Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle...
Posts: 9,449
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Sorry can't resist..
Gollum to Sam : "I may be falling-over-drunk but Frodo's legless......"
Sam: "Don't be stupid Gollum we left Mr Legolas at Parth Galen.."
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“But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.”
Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace |
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06-13-2006, 12:20 PM
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#10917 | |
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Dead Serious
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers.
Posts: 3,311
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Quote:
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I prefer history, true or feigned.
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06-13-2006, 03:16 PM
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#10918 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: The end of the world as we know it. I feel fine, incidentally.
Posts: 500
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Sam: In all my years, I never would have guessed that YOU were the White Power Ranger, Mister Serkis.
Andy: We defeats the powerss of darknesss, precious!!
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"Wide ne bith wel," cwaeth se the geheirde on helle hriman. |
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06-13-2006, 05:39 PM
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#10919 |
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Ghost Prince of Cardolan
Join Date: May 2003
Location: The Party Tree
Posts: 1,042
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Rated PG-18
Andy: HEY! You'd have "significant shrinkage" too if you were uncloaked!
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Holby is an actual flesh-and-blood person, right? Not, say a sock-puppet of Nilp’s, by any chance? ~Nerwen, WWCIII |
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06-13-2006, 07:33 PM
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#10920 |
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Raffish Rapscallion
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-(
Posts: 2,835
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Andy: "Sorry guys, but I lost my earring & I'm not filming anymore until I find it."
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Linear Mode
