Titles rejected by Frodo, Bilbo and others. - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-25-2007, 01:03 PM

Well, the game is simple and a little silly.
We know that Bilbo went though several titles for his story, so I thought it would be fun to suggest alternate titles for The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit and any other Tolkien work.
Sound good? Then let's go...

The Lord of the Rings could have been called...

- Quest Good.
- The Hobbit 2: The revenge of the killer Hobbit
- Honey, I lost the Ring.
- Sauron's Strange Silliness.
- Rings an' stuff.

The Silmarillion could have been called...

- The Book of shiny things that get stole.
- Book
- Honey, I stole the Silmarils

The Children of Hurin could have been called...

- Honey, I lost the kids.
- Bad stuff in 3D
- Honey, I killed the kids
- Melkor's Malevolent Movements

Legate of Amon Lanc · 04-25-2007, 01:57 PM

The Lord of the Rings could have been in separate books as it is:

Book One - How I Met the Riders
Book Two - Two Deaths...
Book Three - ...and One Funeral
Book Four - The Two Hobbits' Tale
Book Five - It Was on Fire When I Lay Down On It
Book Six - same as above.

The Silmarillion could have been called:

- All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten

The Akallabëth could have been called:

- The Old Man and the Sea

The Children of Hurin could have been called one of these:

- The Old Man and the See
- Beleriand 90210

Mithalwen · 04-25-2007, 02:07 PM

LOTR -"We didn't mean to go to Mordor"

Hobbit "Bilbo Baggins and the Wizard's Quest"

Morai · 04-25-2007, 05:01 PM

Lord of the Rings:
~Frodo and Sam's Excellent (and Dangerous) Adventure
~A Bunch of People Go Places, and Some of Them Return!
~101 Ways to Injure a Ringbearer
~Why Sauron Sold his Practice

The Hobbit:
~My Story
~Why Dragons Aren't that Scary
~How Many Dwarves Does it Take to Get Rid of a Dragon? (Answer on Page 335)

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-26-2007, 12:28 AM

The Silmarillion:

- The Valla from Hell
- Harry Potter And The Magical Demon
- I Can't believe it's not Lord of the Rings
- Police, Camera, Elves
- Carry On Melkor
- I love the First Age

The Might · 04-26-2007, 07:04 AM

The "Fog on the Barrow-Downs" chapter was almost re-named "Frodo Baggins and the Deathly Hallows"

Or a nice idea for the Silmarillion:
Elves are from Venus, Men are from Mars

Maybe in a Narnia-style for LotR:
The eagle, the Witch-king and the Ring

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-26-2007, 11:50 AM

The Lord of the Rings:

- What we did on holiday
- Rings and Things
- Kings and Rings
- The Rings that sings
- Big Book of Stuff what happened...

Children of Hurin

- Christopher Tolkien Likes your money
- One o' them stories
- Bad luck old chap...

Legate of Amon Lanc · 04-26-2007, 03:15 PM

As when everything is going to be renamed except for the Hobbit, we'd read the titles as follows (in order of the Hobbit, LotR, New Shadow, Silmarillion, CoH)

The Hobbit
The Hobbits (with the subtitle "This Time, It's War!")
The Hobbit 3
The Hobbit -1
The Hobbit without the Hobbits

narfforc · 04-27-2007, 01:27 AM

The first few chapters of LotRs could be called:

Stains, Pains and Autumnhobbles.

.

arcticstorm · 04-27-2007, 12:19 PM

Lord of the Rings:

"To Hell and Back"

Hookbill the Goomba · 04-28-2007, 01:09 PM

Before settling on 'The New Shadow' Tolkien tried...

- Not Lord of the Rings
- Let's make up and be Friendly
- The Old bad
- The New Car
- The New House
- The New Hobbit?
- The News.
- The News at ten
- The New Barrow

Galadriel55 · 12-12-2010, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba

The Lord of the Rings:
- Rings and Things
- Kings and Rings
- The Rings that sings

How about "Winnging Kings with Ringing Rings and Sining Things who eat chicken Wings"

Pitchwife · 12-13-2010, 04:47 AM

The Hobbit:
How the Ring was won...

LotR:
...and where it got us

LotR Book VI specifically:
This is the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine)

MaultheStoor · 03-11-2008, 07:01 AM

-Too much Pipe-weed (Hey, they chose the long way, didn't they? I rest my case.)

Eönwë · 07-12-2008, 02:17 PM

Or possibly:
When movies are possible, make one about this and get rich.

alternatively:
How to find a ring lost by your fellow Maia- A guide by Gandalf.

Hookbill the Goomba · 07-12-2008, 02:28 PM

The ideas for Roverandom ranged from odd to insane...

- Caterandom (crossed out with the note 'not good')
- Motharandom (scribbled out with 'stupid' written beside it)
- Three blokes walk into a pub (considered for a while, then stabbed with a spoon)
- Mr Sandman, give me your shoes! (A late night effort by Tolkien)
- The Man in the Moon's least favorite Tuesday (scrapped when Tolkein realised it was a Thursday)
- Wizards and Trousers: a study (back when it was a more academic piece)

But a few of the ideas for 'The Letters of Father Christmas' were too bizarre...

- April Fools in December (Almost gave Christopher Tolkien a heart attack... at age 5)
- Father Christmas: Abominable slave owner of the Frozen wastes (this version included some... unnerving illustrations...)
- Where Noldor go when they die... (scrapped as a title after Tolkien realised that Feanor would burn down Father Christmas' beard in about a second).

04-25-2007, 01:03 PM	#1
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Titles rejected by Frodo, Bilbo and others. Well, the game is simple and a little silly. We know that Bilbo went though several titles for his story, so I thought it would be fun to suggest alternate titles for The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit and any other Tolkien work. Sound good? Then let's go... The Lord of the Rings could have been called... - Quest Good. - The Hobbit 2: The revenge of the killer Hobbit - Honey, I lost the Ring. - Sauron's Strange Silliness. - Rings an' stuff. The Silmarillion could have been called... - The Book of shiny things that get stole. - Book - Honey, I stole the Silmarils The Children of Hurin could have been called... - Honey, I lost the kids. - Bad stuff in 3D - Honey, I killed the kids - Melkor's Malevolent Movements __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket... Last edited by Hookbill the Goomba; 04-25-2007 at 01:12 PM.

04-25-2007, 01:57 PM	#2
Legate of Amon Lanc A Voice That Gainsayeth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: In that far land beyond the Sea Posts: 7,431	Great thread, Hookbill! The Lord of the Rings could have been in separate books as it is: Book One - How I Met the Riders Book Two - Two Deaths... Book Three - ...and One Funeral Book Four - The Two Hobbits' Tale Book Five - It Was on Fire When I Lay Down On It Book Six - same as above. The Silmarillion could have been called: - All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten The Akallabëth could have been called: - The Old Man and the Sea The Children of Hurin could have been called one of these: - The Old Man and the See - Beleriand 90210 __________________ "Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories Last edited by Legate of Amon Lanc; 04-26-2007 at 06:05 AM.

04-25-2007, 02:07 PM	#3
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,449	LOTR -"We didn't mean to go to Mordor" Hobbit "Bilbo Baggins and the Wizard's Quest" __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace

04-25-2007, 05:01 PM	#4
Morai Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2002 Location: Where young people go to retire Posts: 709	Random Title #218 Lord of the Rings: ~Frodo and Sam's Excellent (and Dangerous) Adventure ~A Bunch of People Go Places, and Some of Them Return! ~101 Ways to Injure a Ringbearer ~Why Sauron Sold his Practice The Hobbit: ~My Story ~Why Dragons Aren't that Scary ~How Many Dwarves Does it Take to Get Rid of a Dragon? (Answer on Page 335) __________________ "So why the safe distance, this curious look? Why tear out single pages when you can throw away the book? Why pluck one string when you can strum the guitar? MeWithoutYou http://fortyfifthparadox.com

04-26-2007, 12:28 AM	#5
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The Silmarillion: - The Valla from Hell - Harry Potter And The Magical Demon - I Can't believe it's not Lord of the Rings - Police, Camera, Elves - Carry On Melkor - I love the First Age __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-26-2007, 07:04 AM	#6
The Might Guard of the Citadel Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Oxon Posts: 2,205	The "Fog on the Barrow-Downs" chapter was almost re-named "Frodo Baggins and the Deathly Hallows" Or a nice idea for the Silmarillion: Elves are from Venus, Men are from Mars Maybe in a Narnia-style for LotR: The eagle, the Witch-king and the Ring __________________ “The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.” Delos B. McKown Last edited by The Might; 04-26-2007 at 07:07 AM.

04-26-2007, 11:50 AM	#7
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The Lord of the Rings: - What we did on holiday - Rings and Things - Kings and Rings - The Rings that sings - Big Book of Stuff what happened... Children of Hurin - Christopher Tolkien Likes your money - One o' them stories - Bad luck old chap... __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

04-26-2007, 03:15 PM	#8
Legate of Amon Lanc A Voice That Gainsayeth Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: In that far land beyond the Sea Posts: 7,431	Other ideas... As when everything is going to be renamed except for the Hobbit, we'd read the titles as follows (in order of the Hobbit, LotR, New Shadow, Silmarillion, CoH) The Hobbit The Hobbits (with the subtitle "This Time, It's War!") The Hobbit 3 The Hobbit -1 The Hobbit without the Hobbits __________________ "Should the story say 'he ate bread,' the dramatic producer can only show 'a piece of bread' according to his taste or fancy, but the hearer of the story will think of bread in general and picture it in some form of his own." -On Fairy-Stories

04-27-2007, 01:27 AM	#9
narfforc Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Muddy-earth Posts: 1,297	We should have caught the Bus to Rivendell. The first few chapters of LotRs could be called: Stains, Pains and Autumnhobbles. . __________________ [B]THE LORD OF THE GRINS:THE ONE PARODY....A PARODY BETTER THAN THE RINGS OF POWER.

04-27-2007, 12:19 PM	#10
arcticstorm Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Johnson Bible College: Knoxville, TN Posts: 464	Lord of the Rings: "To Hell and Back"

04-28-2007, 01:09 PM	#11
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	Before settling on 'The New Shadow' Tolkien tried... - Not Lord of the Rings - Let's make up and be Friendly - The Old bad - The New Car - The New House - The New Hobbit? - The News. - The News at ten - The New Barrow __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

12-13-2010, 04:47 AM	#13
Pitchwife Wight of the Old Forest Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Unattended on the railway station, in the litter at the dancehall Posts: 3,329	For REM fans The Hobbit: How the Ring was won... LotR: ...and where it got us LotR Book VI specifically: This is the end of the world as we know it (and I feel fine) __________________ Und aus dem Erebos kamen viele seelen herauf der abgeschiedenen toten.- Homer, Odyssey, Canto XI

03-11-2008, 07:01 AM	#14
MaultheStoor Animated Skeleton Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: The cave under the Misty Mountains. Just take a wrong turn in the goblin's tunnels. Posts: 34	-Too much Pipe-weed (Hey, they chose the long way, didn't they? I rest my case.) __________________ Leave now, and never come back! Gollum, Gollum! See? You made him mad.

07-12-2008, 02:17 PM	#15
Eönwë Flame Imperishable Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Right here Posts: 3,928	Or possibly: When movies are possible, make one about this and get rich. alternatively: How to find a ring lost by your fellow Maia- A guide by Gandalf. __________________ Welcome to the Barrow Do-owns Forum / Such a lovely place

07-12-2008, 02:28 PM	#16
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 5,912	The ideas for *Roverandom* ranged from odd to insane... - Caterandom (crossed out with the note 'not good') - Motharandom (scribbled out with 'stupid' written beside it) - Three blokes walk into a pub (considered for a while, then stabbed with a spoon) - Mr Sandman, give me your shoes! (A late night effort by Tolkien) - The Man in the Moon's least favorite Tuesday (scrapped when Tolkein realised it was a Thursday) - Wizards and Trousers: a study (back when it was a more academic piece) But a few of the ideas for *'The Letters of Father Christmas'* were too bizarre... - April Fools in December (Almost gave Christopher Tolkien a heart attack... at age 5) - Father Christmas: Abominable slave owner of the Frozen wastes (this version included some... unnerving illustrations...) - Where Noldor go when they die... (scrapped as a title after Tolkien realised that Feanor would burn down Father Christmas' beard in about a second). __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...