Crazy Captions - Page 179 - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Hookbill the Goomba · 09-05-2005, 10:00 AM

Valinor wasn't quite what Frodo had expected.

**The Saucepan Man** · 09-05-2005, 10:24 AM

Frodo: Sam? Merry? Pippin? Er - I think that you might have used a bit too much self-raising flour in the cake mix ...

The Perky Ent · 09-05-2005, 10:34 AM

Frodo: So this is Minas Tirith?
Gollem: Yes. You'll be safes here. Just lie back.
Frodo: um...ok
Sam: Wow. So this is Minas Tirith. It's just the way Faramir described it!

Oddwen · 09-05-2005, 10:42 AM

?!?! This isn't Osgiliath!

Or...

Frodo paused in his runway stalk to show off Shélob's newest item in the Prei fashion line - a translucent and lucious spider-web shawl.

Hookbill the Goomba · 09-05-2005, 10:44 AM

The obligatory

Frodo: ... ... ... Gandalf?

OR

Frodo is horrified to find out that the spider web look has gone out of fashion.

CaptainofDespair · 09-05-2005, 10:45 AM

Frodo was not frightened by Shelob's Lair. He had seen dead people. He had seen the Great Eye. He hadn't even been frightened by Tom Bombadil and his yellow boots. How was a spider going to scare him?

Mithalwen · 09-05-2005, 11:29 AM

Frodo realised it had been a mistake to wash his hair in Ent Draught....

Kitanna · 09-05-2005, 11:43 AM

Frodo:....Orcs...breakdancing...in the nude?!

Gurthang · 09-05-2005, 01:05 PM

Frodo: "Oh my..."
Stone Giant(only his leg is showing): "Oh! I almost stepped on you. So Sorry."
Frodo:

OR

Frodo: "Wow. How did I survive falling from way up there."

OR

Momma Baggins: "Frodo, come in for supper, dear!"
Frodo(to self): "Crap! I just ripped a hole in my pants!"

OR

Frodo has no idea what's going on.

Hookbill the Goomba · 09-05-2005, 01:16 PM

Frodo: A giant spider! I know what to do! Pippin! Stall her! ... ... oh rats! Pippin isn't here... SAM!

Bêthberry · 09-05-2005, 01:16 PM

Frodo, exhausted by dysentary, wonders if he shouldn't just shoot Shelob instead of out-playing her.

Formendacil · 09-05-2005, 01:17 PM

How to survive a Hobbit's Childhood, Lesson 213:

Never, ever, ever get lost in an oliphaunt's litterbox.

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 09-05-2005, 01:36 PM

Frodo took one look at Shelob, and immediately regretted not renewing his subscription to Giant Spiders and How to Kill Them Monthly.

OR

Pippin and Merry weren't sensible enough; it took the more reliable Frodo to warn Treebeard of the dangers of sunburn.

OR

Frodo is left unsure what to do as The Saucepan Man gets that flour-based caption in first.

Lalwendë · 09-05-2005, 01:38 PM

Frodo on the field trip.

"Right, this is definitely going to come up in the Geography exam. So Stalactites hang down, like tights, and Stalagmites grow up 'cause they have a g for ground in the word. Or I could just cheat and copy off Sam?"

Orominuialwen · 09-05-2005, 01:45 PM

Frodo stares in shock, as he realizes Old Man Willow has been encased in cement by Tom Bombadil. (It looks like there's a face in the rock, if you look closely.)

Kath · 09-05-2005, 02:44 PM

Frodo: Now how did that pancake get all the way up there!?!

Kitanna · 09-05-2005, 03:38 PM

Lost in....Middle-Earth?

Danger, Frodo Baggins! Danger!
Frodo: Oh the pain, the pain.

Alcarillo · 09-05-2005, 03:52 PM

Frodo breathes a sigh of relief after losing Sam in Cirith Ungol.

Frodo: Serves him right for eating half of all the lembas.

Boromir88 · 09-05-2005, 03:56 PM

Frodo: The holy grail lies in the Castle Auuuurgggg..... Hmm, must have died while writing it.

Bywaters · 09-05-2005, 04:09 PM

Elijah: I cant stand it Peter... I thought you said we weren't going to have to do this scene? And now you you throw it into The Return of the King! You know how I hate spiders!!

Where's my agent!!!

Gil-Galad · 09-05-2005, 04:14 PM

Elrond: Bloody 'ell their attacking during tea-time

The Only Real Estel · 09-05-2005, 08:11 PM

Frodo: "Bloody pricks. I'll have you know fishnet is in-style!"

The Perky Ent · 09-05-2005, 08:52 PM

Frodo: Wait a minute....this isn't in Return of the King. This doesn't make sense...my entire reality is upside down! I don't know what to believe anymore. Sam! Fetch me something fried in fat and smothered with chocolate

The Only Real Estel · 09-05-2005, 09:10 PM

Frodo: "Oh no. Not another blindingly glowy light. Last time I saw that Arwen showed up uninvited."

Nilpaurion Felagund · 09-05-2005, 09:36 PM

This was taken before a giant eagle's droppings landed on him.

Hookbill the Goomba · 09-05-2005, 11:53 PM

Frodo accidentally walks in on Shelob in the middle of a romantic candle lit meal with another giant spider.

Frodo: Erm... I'll come back later...

Nilpaurion Felagund · 09-06-2005, 03:29 AM

Frodo caught Shelob dating . . . Pippin!

Lalwendë · 09-06-2005, 04:00 AM

When Frodo had yelled "I just wanna Rock!" this hadn't been the kind of rock he had been thinking of.

**The Saucepan Man** · 09-06-2005, 04:57 AM

Frodo could put it off no longer. The time had finally come to call the pest exterminators into Bag End.

Hookbill the Goomba · 09-06-2005, 09:18 AM

Frodo: So this is Aragorn's bath room. No wonder he hasn't washed...

mormegil · 09-06-2005, 10:14 AM

Frodo, always a favorite of the magazine, does his best pose 'the helpless look' for the readers of Man-Eating Spiders Monthly. Such a pose was bound to boost montly sales when it appeared on the cover.

The Only Real Estel · 09-06-2005, 10:24 AM

Voice: "Frodo Baggins. I strongly advise you to join any other Barrowdowners who have not yet played in the Werewolf games & participate in WW10. And you know what I mean by 'strongly advise'..."

The Perky Ent · 09-06-2005, 11:34 AM

Frodo: I'm trying! But everyone isn't lynched yet! how can I play in the next one without the lynching?
Gollum: Lynch this!
*Gollum kills Frodo and Sam. On their tombstones, it reads

Quote:

~*~ Here Lies Frodo and Sam ~*~
Cause of Death: Vending Machine

Bêthberry · 09-06-2005, 01:19 PM

Exhausted and terrified, Frodo heard that wee small voice at his shoulder say, "Use the Force, Frodo".

Gurthang · 09-06-2005, 04:17 PM

A strange bright glow suddenly comes to Frodo's eyes. The light is oddly familiar.
Frodo: "You've got to be kidding me.... There's a Starbucks in Shelob's Lair?!"

Boromir88 · 09-06-2005, 04:20 PM

Frodo: Hey look, a new picture...

Theoden: Whoever dares throw a cabbage at me again, I swear, Eru as my witness...(gets hit in the head with something)...Hey I warned you! That's it.

Guy in Crowd: You said cabbage sir, I threw a head of spinnach at you.

Gurthang · 09-06-2005, 04:30 PM

Guy in Crowd: "Sir don't look!"
Theoden: "Where? Gandalf?!.... OHHH!"

OR

Theoden: "I said that you were not to bring stuffed animals to war!"

OR

PJ: "Cut! Hey, who's the guy in the jeans! We have to do that whole scene over now!"

Kitanna · 09-06-2005, 04:31 PM

Theoden: Ok, we ran out of hobbits, so Tim the gopher is our new flag bearer. Any questions?

(courtesy of my friend, Paul)

**The Saucepan Man** · 09-06-2005, 04:32 PM

Theoden: KEEP AWAY FROM MY HORSE, YOU SNIVELLING PEASANTS! OK, Eomer. Now you try it.

CaptainofDespair · 09-06-2005, 04:32 PM

Theoden is feeling the effects of extended riding. But he doesn't need to worry, because he has Preparation H.

09-05-2005, 10:00 AM	#7121
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Valinor wasn't quite what Frodo had expected. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

09-05-2005, 10:24 AM	#7122
The Saucepan Man Corpus Cacophonous Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: A green and pleasant land Posts: 8,468	Frodo: Sam? Merry? Pippin? Er - I think that you might have used a bit too much self-raising flour in the cake mix ... __________________ Do you mind? I'm busy doing the fishstick. It's a very delicate state of mind!

09-05-2005, 10:34 AM	#7123
The Perky Ent Maniacal Mage Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Setting sail for Umbar, with Firefoot at my side! Posts: 3,332	Frodo: So this is Minas Tirith? Gollem: Yes. You'll be safes here. Just lie back. Frodo: um...ok Sam: Wow. So this is Minas Tirith. It's just the way Faramir described it! __________________ 'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'

09-05-2005, 10:42 AM	#7124
Oddwen Drummer in the Deep Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Next Sunday A.D. Posts: 2,246	You knew it was coming... ?!?! This isn't Osgiliath! Or... Frodo paused in his runway stalk to show off Shélob's newest item in the Prei fashion line - a translucent and lucious spider-web shawl. __________________ But all the while I sit and think of times there were before I listen for returning feet and voices at the door

09-05-2005, 10:44 AM	#7125
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	The obligatory Frodo: ... ... ... Gandalf? OR Frodo is horrified to find out that the spider web look has gone out of fashion. __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

09-05-2005, 10:45 AM	#7126
CaptainofDespair Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 452	Frodo was not frightened by Shelob's Lair. He had seen dead people. He had seen the Great Eye. He hadn't even been frightened by Tom Bombadil and his yellow boots. How was a spider going to scare him?

09-05-2005, 11:29 AM	#7127
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,916	You notice how big his head is? Frodo realised it had been a mistake to wash his hair in Ent Draught.... __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace

09-05-2005, 11:43 AM	#7128
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,390	Frodo:....Orcs...breakdancing...in the nude?! __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

09-05-2005, 01:05 PM	#7129
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,507	Frodo: "Oh my..." Stone Giant(only his leg is showing): "Oh! I almost stepped on you. So Sorry." Frodo: OR Frodo: "Wow. How did I survive falling from way up there." OR Momma Baggins: "Frodo, come in for supper, dear!" Frodo(to self): "Crap! I just ripped a hole in my pants!" OR Frodo has no idea what's going on. __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

09-05-2005, 01:16 PM	#7130
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Frodo: A giant spider! I know what to do! Pippin! Stall her! ... ... oh rats! Pippin isn't here... SAM! __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

09-05-2005, 01:16 PM	#7131
Bêthberry Cryptic Aura Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 6,170	Frodo, exhausted by dysentary, wonders if he shouldn't just shoot Shelob instead of out-playing her. __________________ I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away.

09-05-2005, 01:17 PM	#7132
Formendacil Dead Serious Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Perched on Thangorodrim's towers. Posts: 3,347	How to survive a Hobbit's Childhood, Lesson 213: Never, ever, ever get lost in an oliphaunt's litterbox. __________________ I prefer history, true or feigned.

09-05-2005, 01:36 PM	#7133
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,992	Frodo took one look at Shelob, and immediately regretted not renewing his subscription to Giant Spiders and How to Kill Them Monthly. OR Pippin and Merry weren't sensible enough; it took the more reliable Frodo to warn Treebeard of the dangers of sunburn. OR Frodo is left unsure what to do as The Saucepan Man gets that flour-based caption in first. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

09-05-2005, 01:38 PM	#7134
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,814	Frodo on the field trip. "Right, this is definitely going to come up in the Geography exam. So Stalactites hang down, like tights, and Stalagmites grow up 'cause they have a g for ground in the word. Or I could just cheat and copy off Sam?" __________________ Gordon's alive!

09-05-2005, 01:45 PM	#7135
Orominuialwen Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: Umbar, but before the corsairs took over. (Ave Maria University, FL, USA) Posts: 705	Frodo stares in shock, as he realizes Old Man Willow has been encased in cement by Tom Bombadil. (It looks like there's a face in the rock, if you look closely.) __________________ Gone for lentSeeyou at Easter! (And on Sundays too, maybe.)

09-05-2005, 02:44 PM	#7136
Kath Everlasting Whiteness Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Perusing the laminated book of dreams Posts: 4,725	Frodo: Now how did that pancake get all the way up there!?! __________________ “If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.”

09-05-2005, 03:38 PM	#7137
Kitanna Child of the West Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Watching President Fillmore ride a unicorn Posts: 2,390	Lost in....Middle-Earth? Danger, Frodo Baggins! Danger! Frodo: Oh the pain, the pain. __________________ "Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry." - Mark Twain

09-05-2005, 03:52 PM	#7138
Alcarillo Shadow of the Past Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Minas Mor-go Posts: 1,032	Frodo breathes a sigh of relief after losing Sam in Cirith Ungol. Frodo: Serves him right for eating half of all the lembas.

09-05-2005, 03:56 PM	#7139
Boromir88 Laconic Loreman Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: USA Posts: 7,559	Frodo: The holy grail lies in the Castle Auuuurgggg..... Hmm, must have died while writing it. __________________ Fenris Penguin

09-05-2005, 04:09 PM	#7140
Bywaters Haunting Spirit Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Tengiz, Kazahstan for 6 wks, then home for 2 wks. Blimey Posts: 51	Elijah: I cant stand it Peter... I thought you said we weren't going to have to do this scene? And now you you throw it into The Return of the King! You know how I hate spiders!! Where's my agent!!! __________________ ...I mean good manners don't cost nothing do they, eh? insuperably wasted

09-05-2005, 04:14 PM	#7141
Gil-Galad Psyche of Prince Immortal Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Above a Parapet Obvious exits are: North, South, and Dennis Posts: 5,054	Elrond: Bloody 'ell their attacking during tea-time __________________ Love doesn't blow up and get killed.

09-05-2005, 08:11 PM	#7142
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 3,025	thrown out of the party... Frodo: "Bloody pricks. I'll have you know fishnet is in-style!"

09-05-2005, 08:52 PM	#7143
The Perky Ent Maniacal Mage Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Setting sail for Umbar, with Firefoot at my side! Posts: 3,332	Frodo: Wait a minute....this isn't in Return of the King. This doesn't make sense...my entire reality is upside down! I don't know what to believe anymore. Sam! Fetch me something fried in fat and smothered with chocolate __________________ 'But Melkor also was there, and he came to the house of Fëanor, and there he slew Finwë King of the Noldor before his doors, and spilled the first blood in the Blessed Realm; for Finwë alone had not fled from the horror of the Dark.'

09-05-2005, 09:10 PM	#7144
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 3,025	Frodo: "Oh no. Not another blindingly glowy light. Last time I saw that Arwen showed up uninvited."

09-05-2005, 09:36 PM	#7145
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,430	Frodo's final moments. This was taken before a giant eagle's droppings landed on him. __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

09-05-2005, 11:53 PM	#7146
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Frodo accidentally walks in on Shelob in the middle of a romantic candle lit meal with another giant spider. Frodo: Erm... I'll come back later... __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

09-06-2005, 03:29 AM	#7147
Nilpaurion Felagund Scion of The Faithful Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: The brink, where hope and despair are akin. [The Philippines] Posts: 5,430	BIG gossip. Frodo caught Shelob dating . . . Pippin! __________________ フェンリス鴨 (Fenrisu Kamo) The plot, cut, defeated. I intend to copy this sig forever - so far so good...

09-06-2005, 04:00 AM	#7148
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,814	When Frodo had yelled "I just wanna Rock!" this hadn't been the kind of rock he had been thinking of. __________________ Gordon's alive!

09-06-2005, 04:57 AM	#7149
The Saucepan Man Corpus Cacophonous Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: A green and pleasant land Posts: 8,468	Frodo could put it off no longer. The time had finally come to call the pest exterminators into Bag End. __________________ Do you mind? I'm busy doing the fishstick. It's a very delicate state of mind!

09-06-2005, 09:18 AM	#7150
Hookbill the Goomba Alive without breath Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: On A Cold Wind To Valhalla Posts: 6,153	Frodo: So this is Aragorn's bath room. No wonder he hasn't washed... __________________ I think that if you want facts, then The Downer Newspaper is probably the place to go. I know! I read it once. THE PHANTOM AND ALIEN: The Legend of the Golden Bus Ticket...

09-06-2005, 10:14 AM	#7151
mormegil Maundering Mage Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 4,679	Frodo, always a favorite of the magazine, does his best pose 'the helpless look' for the readers of Man-Eating Spiders Monthly. Such a pose was bound to boost montly sales when it appeared on the cover. __________________ When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators. -- P. J. O'Rourke

09-06-2005, 10:24 AM	#7152
The Only Real Estel Raffish Rapscallion Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Far from the 'Downs, it seems :-( Posts: 3,025	a voice from heaven? Voice: "Frodo Baggins. I strongly advise you to join any other Barrowdowners who have not yet played in the Werewolf games & participate in WW10. And you know what I mean by 'strongly advise'..."

09-06-2005, 01:19 PM	#7154
Bêthberry Cryptic Aura Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 6,170	Exhausted and terrified, Frodo heard that wee small voice at his shoulder say, "Use the Force, Frodo". __________________ I’ll sing his roots off. I’ll sing a wind up and blow leaf and branch away.

09-06-2005, 04:17 PM	#7155
Gurthang Sword of Spirit Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Oh, I'm around. Posts: 1,507	A strange bright glow suddenly comes to Frodo's eyes. The light is oddly familiar. Frodo: "You've got to be kidding me.... There's a Starbucks in Shelob's Lair?!" __________________ I'm on a Mission from God.

09-06-2005, 04:20 PM	#7156
Boromir88 Laconic Loreman Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: USA Posts: 7,559	Frodo: Hey look, a new picture... Theoden: Whoever dares throw a cabbage at me again, I swear, Eru as my witness...(gets hit in the head with something)...Hey I warned you! That's it. Guy in Crowd: You said cabbage sir, I threw a head of spinnach at you. __________________ Fenris Penguin