Barrow Downs Products - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

Morai · 12-18-2004, 08:22 PM

I say we all need this at one time or another:
Friend Zapper 3000 : Ever get sick of your naive non-LOTR-fan pals asking you questions or making unintelligent comments while your reading the books or watching the movies? By the Friend Zapper 3000! Never have to worry again about missing your favorite scene or loosing your place in the tiny print and large paragraphs. When your companion cannot stop their tounge from forming endless blather, simply push a button and a electric shock will silence them momentarily. Comes equipped with duct tape for extreme circumstances and sedatives. (Warning sedatives may cause drowsiness, and side effects of Zapper include but are not limited to: pain, shocking sensations, numbness, and irrability. Manufacturers not responsible for angry friends.)

Meh, maybe they won't sell like hot-cakes. Moaning and screaming might actually be more annoying then the talking.

Vuelve · 12-18-2004, 09:14 PM

I want The Saucepan Man action figure complete with pots and pans that bang and clang.I also want an Estelyn Telcontar action figure that strangely looks like Princess Pheona.
sorry for any bad spelling please don't let the Skewrlz loose on me.

Saraphim · 12-19-2004, 12:03 AM

Personally, I'd like a Saraphim action figure, because it comes to haunt the Downs only on days that conspicously coincide with school holidays!

Also, I'd purchase the Barrow-Dictionary at-a-glance. For the times when you're on the go with nowhere to look up obscure LotR terms!

Lhunardawen · 12-19-2004, 04:51 AM

Want to invent your own ending of the Fordim-Mithalwen duel in this thread? You can now buy the aptly-called Fordim-Mithalwen action figures set, complete with the infamous gauntlet, plus pistols and swords to choose from...and create an alternate dialogue! With a free gardening set, should your Mithalwen still decide to resort to gardening! (You can use the gauntlet for that purpose instead.)

And since it is the holiday season, you get a free luke10_27...I mean mark12_30 doll to serve as overseer-slash-cheerer!

Mithalwen · 12-19-2004, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lhunardawen

Want to invent your own ending of the Fordim-Mithalwen duel in this thread? You can now buy the aptly-called Fordim-Mithalwen action figures set, complete with the infamous gauntlet, plus pistols and swords to choose from...and create an alternate dialogue! With a free gardening set, should your Mithalwen still decide to resort to gardening! (You can use the gauntlet for that purpose instead.)

This one quite appeals (despite the feminist misgivings) Just 2 alternative outfits - I rather see myself in a duelling costume ala Onegin ..... black is so flattering and a nice long frock coat would be good

... the gardening clothes would be rather less elegant... so Mith might give up on the dedication to a life of non-violence...

Lalwendë · 12-19-2004, 12:57 PM

Quote:

? I don't have that many clothes...... And while the feminist streak revulses against being depicted as a DOLL even in jest ... I can promise that owners of a Mithalwen Doll would never be able to find its shoes In combination with Lalwende ? - flattering (save that I would be the big clumsy figure in comparison)and might just stop me being remaindered- but what a lot of wild red hair!!!!! Actually think I would have to be more of an inaction figure or a cuddly toy. And if Lal is accessorized with a packet of fags I would need a bottle of Merlot... Eat your hearts out Patsy and Edina... the Mithalwen figure would have a repertoire of flippant remarks and performance would be generally erratic...

How do you know I wouldn't be the clumsy one? With all that red hair the dolls would have to be packaged with a hair brush, and some camomile tea to calm them down!

Or they could even come packaged with a Moderator figure to stop them talking off-topic too much...

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 12-19-2004, 01:41 PM

Because of my unimaginitive and confusing screenname, I think that most kids would be disappointed when purchasing the Eomer of the Rohirrim figure.

Something along the lines of; "But I wanted the hot blonde one..."

I do have the proper Eomer action figure. He stands on my desk looking lordly.

Nilpaurion Felagund · 01-14-2005, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Want to invent your own ending of the Fordim-Mithalwen duel in this thread? You can now buy the aptly-called Fordim-Mithalwen action figures set, complete with the infamous gauntlet, plus pistols and swords to choose from...and create an alternate dialogue! With a free gardening set, should your Mithalwen still decide to resort to gardening! (You can use the gauntlet for that purpose instead.)

And since it is the holiday season, you get a free luke10_27...I mean mark12_30 doll to serve as overseer-slash-cheerer! (Lhuna)

There's a new addition to this set: the Gnomish Gauntlet. Scandalised by Fordim's revival of hot issues? Use the Gauntlet to force him to reveal his ulterior motive.

This is stupid. There's no connexion between the gauntlet and the motive.

I know. But it's fun to fill in the blanks.

Your life.

Lalwendë · 01-15-2005, 06:15 AM

Barrow-Downs Faction Badges - these will clearly indicate your loyalties in the Balrog Wings/Elven Ears debates. For those who are Pro-Wing, their badge will be like RAF Wings, except instead of being Albatross wings they will be blackened leathery Balrog wings; this is to be worn on the left shoulder. For those who are Anti-Wing they can actually get away without purchasing anything, because as in the debate, the badge will be purely metaphorical. The merest suggestion of a badge-pin hole in the lapel will suffice

The Ears Faction Badges will feature either a pointy or a non-pointy ear. Pro-Ear fanatics of course can buy an actual ear which they can wear proudly on their lapel; this will clearly indicate that not only are they Pro-Ear but they have also been driven quite mad with the debate and are under no circumstances to be approached.

12-18-2004, 08:22 PM	#1
Morai Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2002 Location: Where young people go to retire Posts: 709	Random Sales Pitches with Titles I say we all need this at one time or another: Friend Zapper 3000 : Ever get sick of your naive non-LOTR-fan pals asking you questions or making unintelligent comments while your reading the books or watching the movies? By the Friend Zapper 3000! Never have to worry again about missing your favorite scene or loosing your place in the tiny print and large paragraphs. When your companion cannot stop their tounge from forming endless blather, simply push a button and a electric shock will silence them momentarily. Comes equipped with duct tape for extreme circumstances and sedatives. (Warning sedatives may cause drowsiness, and side effects of Zapper include but are not limited to: pain, shocking sensations, numbness, and irrability. Manufacturers not responsible for angry friends.) Meh, maybe they won't sell like hot-cakes. Moaning and screaming might actually be more annoying then the talking. __________________ "So why the safe distance, this curious look? Why tear out single pages when you can throw away the book? Why pluck one string when you can strum the guitar? MeWithoutYou http://fortyfifthparadox.com

12-18-2004, 09:14 PM	#2
Vuelve Wight Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: A portal to an alternate dimension at your local Wal-Mart store. Posts: 161	I want The Saucepan Man action figure complete with pots and pans that bang and clang.I also want an Estelyn Telcontar action figure that strangely looks like Princess Pheona. sorry for any bad spelling please don't let the Skewrlz loose on me. __________________ Now, what do you own the world? How do you own disorder? Disorder! - Toxicity-System of A Down

12-19-2004, 12:03 AM	#3
Saraphim Shade of Carn Dûm Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The other side of freezing. Posts: 404	Personally, I'd like a Saraphim action figure, because it comes to haunt the Downs only on days that conspicously coincide with school holidays! Also, I'd purchase the Barrow-Dictionary at-a-glance. For the times when you're on the go with nowhere to look up obscure LotR terms! __________________ I drink Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters! ~ Always remember: pillage BEFORE you burn.

12-19-2004, 04:51 AM	#4
Lhunardawen Hauntress of the Havens Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: IN it, but not OF it Posts: 2,538	Want to invent your own ending of the Fordim-Mithalwen duel in this thread? You can now buy the aptly-called Fordim-Mithalwen action figures set, complete with the infamous gauntlet, plus pistols and swords to choose from...and create an alternate dialogue! With a free gardening set, should your Mithalwen still decide to resort to gardening! (You can use the gauntlet for that purpose instead.) And since it is the holiday season, you get a free luke10_27...I mean mark12_30 doll to serve as overseer-slash-cheerer! Last edited by Lhunardawen; 12-19-2004 at 04:55 AM. Reason: more toys=more fun!!!

12-19-2004, 01:41 PM	#7
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	Because of my unimaginitive and confusing screenname, I think that most kids would be disappointed when purchasing the Eomer of the Rohirrim figure. Something along the lines of; "But I wanted the hot blonde one..." I do have the proper Eomer action figure. He stands on my desk looking lordly. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond Last edited by Eomer of the Rohirrim; 12-19-2004 at 01:43 PM. Reason: The Wargs made me do it.

01-15-2005, 06:15 AM	#9
Lalwendë A Mere Boggart Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: under the bed Posts: 4,737	Barrow-Downs Faction Badges - these will clearly indicate your loyalties in the Balrog Wings/Elven Ears debates. For those who are Pro-Wing, their badge will be like RAF Wings, except instead of being Albatross wings they will be blackened leathery Balrog wings; this is to be worn on the left shoulder. For those who are Anti-Wing they can actually get away without purchasing anything, because as in the debate, the badge will be purely metaphorical. The merest suggestion of a badge-pin hole in the lapel will suffice The Ears Faction Badges will feature either a pointy or a non-pointy ear. Pro-Ear fanatics of course can buy an actual ear which they can wear proudly on their lapel; this will clearly indicate that not only are they Pro-Ear but they have also been driven quite mad with the debate and are under no circumstances to be approached. __________________ Gordon's alive!