If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would.... - The Barrow-Downs Discussion Forum

HerenIstarion · 03-25-2005, 06:39 AM

Quote:

If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would....

Close the door. Upon some reflection - stop drinking. Right now. Upon some more reflection - go splash some cold water over my head. Upon even more reflection - check the door again. If orks were still there, well, try to dispose myself to salutary mood real quick and prepare to die, meanwhile posing a question of 'yes, may I help you' (who knows, maybe it's not me they are after, after all?) in the most unobtrusive tone I could possibly manage given the circumstances.

Or maybe die of fright on the spot

Eomer of the Rohirrim · 03-25-2005, 01:48 PM

Challenge the leader and two of his best Orcs to a game of Monopoly (because it takes ages to finish) and hope to casually win them over with my lovely character. If that got a bit heated then I would amuse them with magic tricks.

The Orcs would grow to like me and leave my home without hurting anyone.

03-25-2005, 02:22 PM

If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would...

Smirk as they bowed in humble reverence before my dark, dimented glory.
Then I'd politely say thank you as one of them got me a Pina Colada, while the rest give me neck massages, put soothing music on the CD player, and started up the jaccuzzi.
*sigh* It's a hard life... *evil smirk*

Lalwendë · 03-25-2005, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eomer of the Rohirrim

Challenge the leader and two of his best Orcs to a game of Monopoly (because it takes ages to finish)

I would challenge them to a game of that classic from the 70's, Escape From Colditz. It took so long to gather the little cards which gave your plastic men guns or fake passports that you began to wonder if they were ever going to get out, and then when they did, they'd land on a square where they'd get caught. The Orcs would die of boredom.

Or else I'd challenge them to a game of darts. With my useless throwing I'd knock out one hundred and eighty Orcs a time with one arrow.

Mithalwen · 03-26-2005, 02:00 PM

If this were a while ago....

Tell my sister her date had arrived (and brought his family)

Elennar Starfire · 03-27-2005, 02:21 PM

Call Falky to come cover my back, then proceed to kick their derrieres.

03-25-2005, 01:48 PM	#2
Eomer of the Rohirrim Auspicious Wraith Join Date: May 2002 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 4,859	Challenge the leader and two of his best Orcs to a game of Monopoly (because it takes ages to finish) and hope to casually win them over with my lovely character. If that got a bit heated then I would amuse them with magic tricks. The Orcs would grow to like me and leave my home without hurting anyone. __________________ Los Ingobernables de Harlond

03-25-2005, 02:22 PM	#3
Falkor Guest Posts: n/a	Only 200,000? If I found 200,000 orcs on my front door, I would... Smirk as they bowed in humble reverence before my dark, dimented glory. Then I'd politely say thank you as one of them got me a Pina Colada, while the rest give me neck massages, put soothing music on the CD player, and started up the jaccuzzi. sigh It's a hard life... evil smirk

03-26-2005, 02:00 PM	#5
Mithalwen Pilgrim Soul Join Date: May 2004 Location: watching the wonga-wonga birds circle... Posts: 9,461	If this were a while ago.... Tell my sister her date had arrived (and brought his family) __________________ “But Finrod walks with Finarfin his father beneath the trees in Eldamar.” Christopher Tolkien, Requiescat in pace Last edited by Mithalwen; 03-26-2005 at 02:15 PM.

03-27-2005, 02:21 PM	#6
Elennar Starfire Ghost Prince of Cardolan Join Date: May 2003 Location: Nowhere...now here Posts: 952	Call Falky to come cover my back, then proceed to kick their derrieres. __________________ Don't let me die!