Be careful what you wish for...

[Valesse]

Originally Posted by Hookbill the Goomba

I wish Saruman was high on pipe weed when he had the parley with Gandalf after Helm's deep.

Well he was! Saruman was so high that he thought that there was no need for a parley at all! So Saruman announces that "Ev-wee one ish friends here, Zoizole!" (we figure thats Gandalf's new "nick name") and even leaves the Orthanc, passing around loaded pipes. Pippin readily takes one and ignores the palantir Saruman (thinking it was a kind of heavy beach-ball) tossed to him. Gandalf was less amused, but didn't do anything about the matter, anyway.

Sauron, without any pipe weed (not like he could smoke it anyway...) or sneaky hobbits to cloud his judgement, is better able to find Frodo. --Also, Faramir burns to death since Pippin didn't show up in Gondor.

I wish Orkish poetry was recognized throughout Middle Earth.