Chapter 1: Of the Beginning of Time

[ArcusCalion]

I like both of these additions.

[Aiwendil]

BoT-13.6, -13.7: I'm fine with this; based on the names of the Lamps ('sky-blue' and 'high-gold') I think we can be confident that the colours of the Lamps remain distinguished, even if it wasn't explicitly mentioned after the Lost Tales.

BoT-21.5: I'm less sure about this. The phrase "in the confusion of darkness" is very similar to the phrase "in the confusion and the darkness" that comes just a few sentences later. And it does seem repetitive to say first that Melkor "roused the seas" and a sentence later that the "seas arose in tumult". And since we already know that Almaren is destroyed, I don't see that this adds much.

[ArcusCalion]

Perhaps:

BoT-21.5 <Q30 and {in the confusion of darkness} he roused the {seas}Great Lake against {their}the island of the Valar.>

[Findegil]

BoT:

BoT-21.5: I can see your concerns, Aiwendil. What about taking the info I want from an older source:

BoT-21 <AAm But Melkor, trusting in the strength of Utumno and the might of his servants, came forth suddenly to war, and struck the first blow, ere the Valar were prepared. {And}<AAm* He came down like a black storm from the North, and> he assailed the lights of Illuin and Ormal, and he cast down their pillars, and broke their lamps. Then in the overthrow of the mighty pillars lands were broken and seas arose in tumult BoT-21.5b<S and {floods}flooded the isle where the Valar {(or Gods)} dwelt>; and when the lamps were spilled destroying flame was poured out over the Earth. And the shape of Arda and the symmetry of its waters and its lands was marred in that time, so that the first designs of the Valar were never after restored.

Respectfully
Findegil

[ArcusCalion]

I am personally hesitant about this, because there is no pressing need to add it thus, for it removes the essential factor that formed your reason for the inclusion: an express attack of Melkor upon Almaren. In addition, the Isle of Almaren is not in the Sea, so the sea cannot rise up and flood it. It was in the Great Lake.

[gondowe]

I'm agreed with BoT 13 additions, more or less is what i had done.
In the case of BoT 21 I think is not necessary the add, I think is inherent with the great cataclysm described the destruction of Almaren.
Greetings

[Aiwendil]

BoT-21.5: If we go with this at all, I would prefer Findegil's last proposal, which I think is minimally disruptive to the text.