Qs and As for TLOTR but I only want WRONG answers

[Catherine]

Gandalf cuz he loves it
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why do the hobbits leave the shire?

[Frodosgirl]

to go and stay with the valar

Q: what was Arwens other elvish name??

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Arwens other elven name was Mallory!

.::Who was elrond's wife?::.

[Catherine]

He had many wives.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How does Gandalf die?

[elengil]

O.D.s on pipeweed..

__________________

How does Boromir die?

[Phoenix Solitude]

He impales himself on his pointed shoes.
**************************************
Who was dumb enough to film the Fellowship treking across Caradhas? I mean, like shadowing the Fellowship and filming their every move then selling it as a film is just phsycotic.

[Alatariel]

It was Bill the Pony - he had a hidden camera on him, then at Moria he planted a camera on each of the members of the Fellowhip wihtout them noticing.
-------------------------------------
What was the inscription on the One Ring?

[elengil]

"If found: please return to..."

_________________________

Why was Frodo taking the ring back to Mordor?

[Nevfeniel]

Because the gold gave him a rash and he wanted his money back.
..::How long did it take Frodo to get to Mordor, and how did he get there?::..

[Brinniel]

It took him 30 minutes by private jet!
*********************************************
What happened at the Prancing Pony?

[Phoenix Solitude]

Merry and Pippin got stone drunk and danced on the tables singing the dirty version of 'Silent night' so Barliman threw them out.
*******************************************
How does Harry Potter feature in LOTR?

[elengil]

He's one of the blokes that gets killed in the extended version, but it gets cut from the theatre release...

_________________________

who kills him??

[ September 18, 2002: Message edited by: elengil ]

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Gandalf of course! There's only room for one wizard...

Why did the Easterlings give the people of Rohan the name "Strawheads?"

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Because, like the commercial on many american televisions...they did not condition their hair to the silky softness of the Elves, in fact, they never conditioned at all!!!(<----hmmm....)

anyway....

.::Why wasn't Eowyn allowed to go with the company to the Morannon?::.

[ September 20, 2002: Message edited by: Aylwen Dreamsong ]

[Grey_pilgrim]

I reckon she had an unmissable appointment at the hairdressers.

Q: why were the paths of the dead so scary? smilies/biggrin.gif smilies/biggrin.gif

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Would YOU walk across a path with a bunch of dead guys following you?Sounds pretty scary to me...

Why didn't Celeborn leave for Mithlond(Gray Havens) with Galadriel?

[Nevfeniel]

The bouncers wouldn't let him into the Grey Havens. Apparently, he wasn't "cool" enough. smilies/rolleyes.gif
..::Who was Sauron and what did he have to do with the making/destruction of the ring? *Be creative!!!*::..

[ September 21, 2002: Message edited by: Nevfeniel ]

[hobbitlass]

It's a shameful misconception. His right name is Ron. He's a kind of chubby kid, hence the added "sow". He found a pretty little ring in his crackerjacks box. Quite a delight, that all the mean kids wanted to take it from him. The ring was stolen by a bully nicknamed Hob 'cause of his limp. Hob bit Ron, gave him an atomic wedgie, then threw the ring into the school furnace. Now Ron cries with his teddy and blanky behind the "bare-red-door" of the school office.
*********************************************
What style of clothes would the blackriders choose if they could?

[Grey_pilgrim]

i think maybe their favourite colour is pink. And purple. and yellow. So i guess maybe they might have a pink frock with purple polka-dots and green stripes.

Why did gandalf want to see tom bombadil on the way back to the shire? smilies/biggrin.gif

[NazgulNumberTen]

he was outta leaf. (old joke with a friends of mine, we where the "leaf-heads" always competing for bombadil's secret stash)
---------
what was manwe's last name?

[Nevfeniel]

They aren't stupid, it's just harder for them to keep up with others (I hope I haven't offended anyone. I tried to be as nice as possible).
..::Where did JRR Tolkien get the idea for LotR and The Hobbit?::..

[Grey_pilgrim]

an angel thingy popped down from heaven and nicely told him that he was meant to be a literary genius by now and he'd better get on with it. Tolkien said he didnt have any ideas, and so the angel kinda prompted him a little.

..:: how did sam + frodo get down the emyn muil? smilies/biggrin.gif

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

They swam.....or at least that is was the old tales tell.

..:: How old is Aragorn?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

he is an unborn baby, acually.
-----------
how many rings where given to the ents?

[Davin]

Ents are allergic to metal...so they don't do well with rings, eh....


Can Ents climb trees?

[NazgulNumberTen]

no, they lack oposable thumbs.
-----------------
just how UGLY is legolas?!

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Very VERY ugly, because last time Gimli got close enough to touch him, he could feel the oil-residue the badly-rinsed hair left. Oh yeah! I forgot about the new line of concealer he is staring! He had a humongo zit from bad face washing habits and...welll......need i say more?

..::Why does Gandalf wear a pointy hat?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

cuz it matches his tight pants!
------
where is bilbo going to help his leaf addiction?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

he's going to L.E.A.F.
L-Leaf
E-erm...
A-Addicts
of
the
F-four farthings....

there ya go!


..::does Gimli ever marry?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

yeah. he carves a gal out of stone.
------------------------
how does pippen die?

[Nevfeniel]

He missed the Gandalf's sarcasm when he said, "Throw yourself in next time, and rid us of your stupidity!".
..::Who was Frodo's best friend in and outside the fellowship?::..

[elengil]

Gimli of course!! That beard.. that helmet... who *couldnt* love that little man?


________________________


Why didnt Frodo want Sam to go with him to Mordor?

[ September 23, 2002: Message edited by: elengil ]

[Grey_pilgrim]

he messed up his hair really bad while running to the boat - he didnt want anyone to see him.
..:: when they got to Mt Doom, why didnt frodo want to throw the ring in?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

It was a collectible, and cost a pretty penny I'll tell you. smilies/biggrin.gif

What was The Mirror of Galadriel and what was it used for?

[Susan Delgado]

It's a looking glass she bought to cater to her husband's vanity. All right, it was really for her vanity.

------------------

What really bad political move did Thingol make?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

He voted Sauron for President smilies/biggrin.gif


::What was Gimli's last name?::

[NazgulNumberTen]

gimlison.
---------------
how long did the journey to destroy the ring last?

[Grey_pilgrim]

about a week - the fellowship hitched a ride on a jumbo jet full of holiday-makers going to mordor.
..::Why did arwen want to give up her immortality for aragorn? smilies/biggrin.gif

[NazgulNumberTen]

she was the poor daughter of a shoe cobbler, what esle did she have to give?
-----------------------
legolas was the son of who?

[Grey_pilgrim]

no-one knows - he was abandoned at birth and given as a birthday pressie to thranduil.
..::What gift did boromir recieve from galadriel?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Coal....he had been a bad boy and stole sam's bacon.......


..::What color was gimli's beard?::..

[Nevfeniel]

Rainbow. Don't you know he's Gimli of many colors?
..::How old is Gandalf?::..

[Grey_pilgrim]

oh, only about twenty. i mean, he was the kid of the previous gandalf who got so fed up of ME he sailed west and got his son to carry on! smilies/biggrin.gif

[Grey_pilgrim]

oh yeah-
..::what was the name of arwen's father?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Bob....yes, his name....was Bob


..::Which twin is older, Elladan or Elrohir??::..

[Grey_pilgrim]

elladan was the older - i mean, everyone knows that the name of the twin who is older is first when you put them in alphabetical order!
..::how did boromir die?::.. smilies/biggrin.gif

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

contrary to popular belief, boromir died because Frodo strangled him after boromir tried to take the ring.


...:::Who did Eowyn Marry?:;;....?

[Grey_pilgrim]

well obviously everyone know eoywn married gimli! they had a very nice life until gimli gave her up an went wiv legolas. smilies/frown.gif
..::how did saruman die?::..

[Liriodendron]

How did Saruman die? He was looking in his palantir (fool!) smilies/biggrin.gif , got hypnotized, and the lidless eye burned a big hole in his brain.

Why did Rose Cotton prefer Sam to Merry or Pippen?

[Alatariel]

Sam was better at algebra than Merry or Pippin.

Why did Sam go with Frodo to Mordor?

[Grey_pilgrim]

he was such a show-off he just wanted to go to be a hero - especially as he heard a tv company were going to film it! the tv crew didnt arrive though and he was left disapointed - but it was too late to back out. smilies/wink.gif
..::what was the name of gandalf in elvish?::.. smilies/biggrin.gif

[NazgulNumberTen]

fluffy g
-----------------
what was the weapon of choice for frodo?

[Grey_pilgrim]

nothing- he didnt want a weapon. he'd studied karate back in the shire and he felt he didnt need a weapon.
..::how many members in the fellowship?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

.03 or at leasts that left after the orcs got to them.
----------------------------
where did elrond live?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

He lived in Hollywood California...

...:::What is boromirs favorite sport?::..

[Nevfeniel]

(American) football. He liked the idea of being allowed to push people over without getting into trouble.
..::Why did Frodo wait so long to destroy the ring?::..

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Anyone who knew frodo would know that he is the biggest procrastinator you will ever meet!!!

..::Who was Elrond's favorite child??::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

he didn't even have any kids!
-----------------
why couldn't elrond have kids?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

A serious accident occured one summer involving an angry brother elros and an axe..... smilies/wink.gif smilies/rolleyes.gif


::::::::::::::::Who was Aragorn's wife??:::::

[NazgulNumberTen]

rose cotton
--------------
IS THIS MY 1000th post?!?!?!?!
IT IS!!!!!
http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif http://216.40.241.68/otn/party/beerchug.gif

[Nevfeniel]

Congratulations, Naz, but do you have any other questions to ask?

[NazgulNumberTen]

um...how many more posts until i suffer the same fate as gimli?
...(gulp)

[merlilot]

um...im new, excuse the lack of humour...

depends on how long it takes to lose a finger: price of admission.
----------------------------
What was Merry's whole name?

[hobbitlass]

Merry Frickin' Christmas
***************************
What is Merry's dirty little secret? smilies/evil.gif

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Alas, unlike his namesake, Merrry in fact, was not the least "merry" smilies/biggrin.gif

Who was Glorfindel? What role did he play in The War of The Ring and why did Arwen replace him in the movie?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Arwen took his place in the movie because the best person they could find to act his part was britney spears....(the power of blondes....it kills me....not that blondes are bad though!!) and Glorfindel was an orc with a very powerful concealer....

Who is oldest? Tom Bombadil or Treebeard??

[Grey_pilgrim]

they were both the same age (around twenty) and they were both people who liked to say believable stuff about them being as old as the hills and whatever.
..::how many members of the fellowship die?::.. smilies/biggrin.gif

[Alatariel]

3 of them die, but then 2 of those are reincarnated as orcs.

Where were the orcs going to take Merry and Pippin?

[merlilot]

Valinor

-------

Who was the king of the Valar?

(And what was 'Merry's dirty little secret' REALLY?? Im curious...

[Grey_pilgrim]

the king of the vala was galadriel. she just felt like disguising herself as an elf and coming to M.E.
..::what was the name of the leader of the uruk-hai?::..

by the way i have no idea what merry's dirty little secret was!!

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

His name was Shelby....yes, his mother and father thought he would turn out to be a girl, and couldnt think of a better name than Shelby anyway. They copied my sisters name!!! GRRRR

LoL
.....:::::How did Arwen die??::...

[Nevfeniel]

The plague.
..::How many times did Pippin get drunk and reveal Frodo's identity? (I want specifics!!)::..

[Eruwen]

12 times on the way TO Rivendell. Then 2 times after that. Frodo finally threw him off the side of Caradhras. "That Fool of a Took!"
-------------------------
What did Frodo do when Sam went after him in the boat?

[ September 28, 2002: Message edited by: Eruwen ]

[Catherine]

Let him drown.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why did Frodo want to go to Mordor alone?

[TolkienGurl]

So no one would know of his secret tryst with Gollum smilies/eek.gif

What does the name Legolas mean?

[ September 28, 2002: Message edited by: TolkienGurl ]

[hobbitlass]

"Very gassy"

(And as for Merry's real dirty little secret- he hates mushrooms and bites his toe nails smilies/eek.gif )

What was the real reason for the Ent-moot?

[Grey_pilgrim]

a new movie starring treebeard had just hit the screens in NY and the were discussing how to raise enough cash to get over there. they decided to attck isengard as they figured there would be loadsa cash there!
..::what was the real name of strider?::..

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Peregrin, son of Aragorn, called the Dwarfstone and many other names beside!

On a recent roadtrip, where did The Fellowship go to?

[Alatariel]

The gym - theyh all really needed a work out
***
What was the name of the innkeeper at the Prancing Pony?

[Halbereth Diagona]

There are some who call him...Tim?
Do Elrond & Celeborn really wear thongs? 'Cos thats' wot I've been told.

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Yes, you heard correctly, they do wear thongs and so do all that live in Rivendell.

What are Entwives?

[Nilwen]

YES

[Nilwen]

NO

[Nilwen]

MAYBE

[Catherine]

Entwives are people that have no noses.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why do elves have pointy ears?

[merlilot]

*no answer*

Disgusting! He bites his toenails???? EWWWWWWWW>>>>> And he hates mushrooms too? Then why did ne push Pippin into the dirt to beat him to them??? Grr. Stupid Brandybuck. (hehehe. That sounds really funny from the girl who used to go by Melilot Brandybuck)

[Grey_pilgrim]

elves dont have pointy ears. they just like playing around with paper and sellotape. someone else ask a question - i gotta run...

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

If no one else minds, I'll go.
Who was the daughter of Galadriel and Celeborn?

[hobbitlass]

Merlilot- Merry has to keep up pretenses, that's why he pushed Pippin down. Besides don't you know what happens to a hobbit that doesn't like mushrooms?!

[ October 01, 2002: Message edited by: hobbitlass ]

[Grey_pilgrim]

oh the daughter of g+c was of course eowyn..i thought everyone knew that?no? wow! ok...
..::what was the name of elronds wife?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

but elrond was a women. she had a husband named gimli son of gloin
--------------------
gandalf brought waht for bilbo's party
a: fireworks
b: orcs
c: sporks
d: pot...i mean...um...leaf smilies/rolleyes.gif

[Brinniel]

Why, he brought sporks of course! He wanted to teach the hobbits how to use them.
*****************************************
How did Bilbo celebrate his birthday?

[Nevfeniel]

Pool party!
..::Why didn't Frodo take his pet dragon, Fluffy, with him on the quest? Wouldn't he have provided extra protection?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

he had just gotten over a nasty break up with sam
---------------------------------
what was the original title of bilbo's book.

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Me, myself, 12 dwarves, 1 wizard and our excellent adventure without my handkerchief!

Why did Frodo sell Bag End to the Sackville-Bagginses?

[suicidal elf chick]

Hello again! Frodo sold Bag End because Shelob had made it her new house, and he didn't want her for a roommate.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What color is Frodo's hair?

[Grey_pilgrim]

oh, all sorts of colours. he dyes it nearly every week. green, blue, orange - you name it, frodo's had his hair that colour.
..::Who was the lord of the grey havens?::.. smilies/biggrin.gif

[Catherine]

The boogie man down the street.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How did Boromir die?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

He drowned in a pool of chocolate swirl pooding. wait...pudding...


...:::Who knew the most about Frodo Baggins?:::...

[merlilot]

*no answer*

haha love your location, there, person who posted the last question...I forgot your name. smilies/redface.gif

That lousy son of a Took! No reason to push Pippin into the dirt except pretenses? Man if he wasn't my cousin of some sort, I'd hurt him...

And what does happen to hobbits h=who don't like mushrooms? Just curious...

[Catherine]

They die!
~~~~~~~~~~
How did Pippin get into the Fellowship?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

No one really knows how he got in the Fellowship. The only thing they knew was that they wanted him out of the fellowship...

Thanks....
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

How old is Gandalf??

[Eruwen]

As who? The Grey-very very old. Number lost around 500 years ago. The white-still very old. Not much has changed. I'd say around 15,925.
-----------------------------------
What exactly are the Paths of the Dead?

[ October 03, 2002: Message edited by: Eruwen ]

[NazgulNumberTen]

the yellow brick road
-----------------------
why did aragorn become king?

[merlilot]

He won the election by default, since his opponent (Sauron) was dead. Very close though...I think Aragorn may have been in on the assassination attempt.

------

What does Eldar mean?

[Catherine]

It's short for Fool of a Took
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why does Gandalf say fly you fools on the movie just as he falls?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Because right after that he casts a spell that gives the fellowship angel's wings (although pippin never figured it out so he had to be carried)

...:::What was Aragorn's favorite food?:::...

[Salix]

Raw man-flesh.

What kind of cat did Eowyn own?

[Brinniel]

She bought a siamese cat and named him Aragorn when she couldn't get the real one.
********************************************
As a married couple, what do Arwen and Aragorn fight about the most?

[Nevfeniel]

Whether or not something did happen between Aragorn and Éowyn. . .
..::Why didn't Éomer like Galadriel?::..

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

He held a grudge because they were in a beauty contest for blondes when Eomer was young and he lost only to Galadriel's pale blonde locks.

...:::Who was Galadriel's favorite grandchild?:::...

[Catherine]

She hated everyone but herself
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Where did Galadriel live?

[Salix]

In Minas Morgul.

How are hobbits related to men?

[hobbitlass]

By my husband's brother's aunt's cousin's grandfather twice removed!
*********************************************
Why haven't there been any dragons in the Shire for at least a thousand years?

[*nevquesseiel*]

hobbits consider dragon to b a delicacy...

y did the elves leave middle earth?

[Nevfeniel]

They were kicked out. Something to do with illegal orc-slaying.
..::How are clouds significant in the story?::..

[Eruwen]

Pippin always gets his head stuck in them. That Took smilies/rolleyes.gif
----------------------------
Why does Aragorn blow out all of the candles when he pulls Frodo into a room in Bree? {Movie}

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

He has that disease where any light brighter than a candle or two gives him blisters and causes him to suffocate (forgot what that condition is called though..)


Why was Legolas taller than Eomer?


(I like this thread because I don't have to worry about getting something right!)


Aylwen

[ October 05, 2002: Message edited by: Aylwen Dreamsong ]

[Salix]

Because he wore 3 foot high platform shoes. (Me no fashion expert. smilies/rolleyes.gif )

How were the Ainur created?

[Brinniel]

They were made from Play-Dough.
********************************************
What is Gandalf's favorite day in the year and why?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

The Thirteenth of October, because it was his calico cat's birthday. Gandalf really loved that old cat.

Who was the first Rider of Rohan to die of Suffocation??

[NazgulNumberTen]

hama...he choked on ham
---------------
how do orcs use their fins?

[Susan Delgado]

They used them to tunnel through the sand like Mario.

-------------------------

What significance do penguins hold for the wights residing in the Barrow Downs?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

The wights of The Barrow Downs have a particular infatuation with Penguin Suits, which are worn whenever they visit Tom Bombadil's place smilies/biggrin.gif

What is the name of Goldberry's mother?

[ October 06, 2002: Message edited by: Glorfinniel the Lost ]

[Susan Delgado]

Betty Crocker (no, really!)

--------------------------------

What is Eru's part in the scheme of things?

[Dark-Caranthir]

Eru was Sauron's right hand man, god, thingy.

-----------------------------------------

Why did the ring slip from Gollum?

[Grey_pilgrim]

coz gollum told the ring that he though gold was tacky.
..::why didnt the ringwraiths like water?::..

[Nevfeniel]

They never learned how to swim.
..::What was Barad-Dur used for?::..

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

The practice place for a new band "Nazgul Number Nine"


What was Aragorn's sisters name?

[Eruwen]

Arwen. {Shhh!! You didn't know? It was. Really!} smilies/wink.gif smilies/tongue.gif
-----------------------------
..::*Why did Gollum change his name after he found the ring?*::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

well, it was a wedding ring, so he took the name of the person he married. he is know known as gollum nahasapasapemapetelon.
------------------------
what terrible affiction did bombadil suffer from

[Susan Delgado]

He was unable to speak clearly and had to put "diddly" on the end of everything.

-------------------------------------

Who is Opus the Penguin?

[hobbitlass]

Sauron's illegitamet son
*********************************************

With all this ring making, what was Sauron's jewelry store name?

[Merry_Pippin_Frodo_Sam]

all 4 frodo &co.

who did arwen really love?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Who did Arwen really love?? Don't tell, but Tom Bombadil has a stalker!!


Who is Sauron's mom??

[hobbitlass]

*no answer*

I have to say MerryPippinFrodoSam, that was very clever! smilies/wink.gif

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Sauron's mum was....(drum roll please)...The local ice cream lady!

What are the names of the Istari?

[Catherine]

Anonymous
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How did Sam get the ring?

[Nevfeniel]

He stole it from Frodo.
..::What does the acronym G.D.J.V.S. mean, and how does it apply to the quest?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

Goodwill Discounters of Jovamania and Vvadenfell sectors. it's there sauron bought the ring for his girlfriend.
------------------------------
why was king theodens third eye poked out and eaten by birds?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Third eyes were like, SO 1983! smilies/biggrin.gif So to get rid of it he popped it out and fed it to the nearest available bird!

Galadriel has had quite a few name changes...Artanis, Nerwen, Alatariel.
So what is her latest name?

[TolkienGurl]

Elven-Chick-Who-Was-Really-Nice-To-The-Fellowship-And-Gave-Them-All-Gifts smilies/rolleyes.gif

Why didn't Gandalf meet the four hobbits at the Prancing Pony?

[ October 10, 2002: Message edited by: TolkienGurl ]

[Eruhen]

He was stoned in his room, watching pink elephants fly around the rafters.

What is Minas Morgul?

[Aramacil]

It's a shop for people with five legs, just outside Bree.
****************************************
What was gollum's favourite object?

[ October 10, 2002: Message edited by: Aramacil ]

[TolkienGurl]

the Sun

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Who was Tom Bombadil?

[Nevfeniel]

Frodo's uncle's step-brother's cousin's next-door-neigbor's former roomate's brother's dog-walker's friend that happened to meet Frodo while grocery shopping. (If that made any sense to anyone besides me, you deserve an award.)
..::Why did Sam have so many children?::..

[merlilot]

They weren't really his...Rosie slept around a lot.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Who was Aragorn's father?

[Childlike Empress]

Perfectly sensible, Nevfeniel smilies/smile.gif


Well, no one knows who Aragorn's father is, but his mother is Rosie Cotton-Gamgee smilies/smile.gif

edit: Oops, forgot the question

Why did Feanor really want the Silmarils back from Morgoth?

[ October 10, 2002: Message edited by: Childlike Empress ]

[Eruhen]

Because his 70s disco outfit wasn't complete without them.

Why did Thorin want to kill Smaug?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because Smaug was a dreadful Bridge partner.

Why was Númenor destroyed?

[HerenIstarion]

Because Valar were unwilling to paint Sauron green
======================================

Why was Gandalf's nose crooked?

[ October 11, 2002: Message edited by: HerenIstarion ]

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

It was an old rugby injury

What was unusual about Túrin's helm?

[Eruhen]

It was bright chartruese and magenta, and covered with purple and yellow flowers.

Why did Frodo become known as Frodo of the Nine Fingers?

[hobbitlass]

To show true loyalty to the quest, the Fellowship members had to chop a finger off and Frodo wore them around his neck along with the ring.
*********************************************
What was Luthien REALLY doing when Beren first saw her?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Playing crazy golf.

For what is Gimli's father known?

[ October 11, 2002: Message edited by: Squatter of Amon Rudh ]

[Susan Delgado]

He'll do anything for a dare.

--------------------------

What were the Green Elves of Mirkwood doing when the Dawarves stumbled upon their midnight gathering?

[Nevfeniel]

They were telling ghost stories about 14 small creatures sneaking up on a group of unsuspecting elves and eating all their food, which is why the elves jumped up and left so quickly.
..::Where did Gandalf really intend to send Bilbo and the dwarves to?::..

[TolkienGurl]

The grocery store to pick up some more kleenex. (I don't know either smilies/rolleyes.gif )


Why did the orcs attack Helm's Deep?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because the Rohirrim were hoarding all of the cocktail onions.

What was the name of the first Steward of Gondor?

[gralin musicteeth]

Hector the Collector.

what does J.R.R. stand for?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Jugged Rabbit Rules

Where is Caras Galadhon?

[gralin musicteeth]

down the road a piece, first right on your left. or is it first left on your right? well go on down that way for about half a mile and turn next to the big red chicken coop. or is it the green buffalo wallow? anyway, it's over there.

What the hell is up between Tom and Goldberry?

[HerenIstarion]

Joint Stock Society "Lily of the Valley" trading lilies. Tom is Head of board of directors, and Goldberry is sales manager
They were trying to fool 4 hobbits into bying some, but when failed, sent them of to the barrows (Tom then repented and got them out)

========================================

Why Legolas should have been beware of gulls?

[Susan Delgado]

Has anyone seen that one Far Side, where the caption says, "How birds see the world", and everything in the picture has targets on top?
--------------------------
What's over the sea West of Middle Earth?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Middle Earth's local Quicki-Mart!

Why was Boromir given a "river burial" (if there's such a thing smilies/biggrin.gif ) instead of the everyday hole in the ground sort?

[gralin musicteeth]

Legolas, Gimli, and Aragorn didn't want to go west to the quicki-mart to buy shovels.

why did Denethor cremate himself?

[Phoenix Solitude]

He was actually trying to roast a pop tart, but got caught in the fire...
********************************
Which fellowship members kept a diary?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

Duh! Gandalf, to deal with his bipolar mental problems! Doctors orders!


How old was Pippin when he started smoking weed?

[gralin musicteeth]

6. it's medical.

Why did Galadriel give Sam a box of dirt?

[Halbereth Diagona]

>medical, whatever<
Because she was a SCROOGE!!!
*****
What is Gandalf's real name?

[Elven Mistress]

He doesn't have a real name

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is Sam's favourite food??

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Microwave Lasagne.

-----------------

Who is "The King of the Golden Hall"?

[gralin musicteeth]

Superfries and McEarwigs (i know it's gross)

why did Smeagol kill Deagol?

[Susan Delgado]

Deagol was the King of the Golden Hall, an d Smeagol was the heir. SMeagol got tired of waiting for Deagol to die naturally, so he bumped him off for his throne.
(Two in one there smilies/smile.gif)

----------------------------------

Why are the Rohirrim so into horses?

[Elven Mistress]

They figured they are so much easier to work with than Oliphants

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What was the fellowship's favourite place that they visited on the quest?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

They talk about Moria all the time. The sun, the beach, Legolas was in heaven!


:::Who did Legolas REALLY marry?:::

[Nevfeniel]

He ressurected Primula Brandybuck, Frodo's mother, and married her. Frodo was furious that Legolas left Drogo alone.
..::What did Tom Bombadil save Merry and Pippin from in the Old Forest?::..

[Elven Mistress]

A tray of *very* old spinach...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What did they learn at Hobbit Schools?

[gralin musicteeth]

How to make balloon animals out of spam.

why are ents so slow?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because the main ingredient of Ent draughts is Valium.
--------------------------------
Where did Aragorn find a replacement for the deceased White Tree?

[Birdland]

Where did Aragorn find a replacement for the deceased White Tree?
Well...actually...he didn't. You see, Gandalf the White wasn't going to need that white staff of his anymore, what with going back to Valinor and all. A few Elven-Made paper leaves and nobody knew the difference.

Hey, it made the Common Folk happy; and if it clinched the deal, as far as being King went, what's the harm?

************************

Why did Eowyn dislike Wormtongue?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because he spurned her amorous advances, of course. Hell hath no fury and so forth.

--------------------------------------

Remaining on the subject of Wormtongue: what was his somewhat ill-advised choice of missile?

[Birdland]

Well, the first things he hurled were the insults:

Wormtongue: You don't frighten us, Dúnedain pig-dog! Go and boil your bottoms, son of a silly person. I blow my nose on you, so-called Elessar-king, you and your silly Rohan K...kaniggets.

Next, of course, came the cow...

**************

However did Gimli find Pippin after the last battle?

[ October 14, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

He sent a message over the public-address system telling Pippin to meet him at the refreshment tent. They enjoyed a companionable beer and a pickled egg, then went to the fell-beast roast that Legolas was organising.

----------------------------------------

What was the oath that had been broken by the Dead Men of Dunharrow?

[ October 14, 2002: Message edited by: Squatter of Amon Rudh ]

[Eruhen]

To always come whenever the King of Gondor had a kegger, even if no one else came. They all suddenly went sober and so they broke their oath on the next weekend.


Who destoys the Ring and where does he/she/it destroy it at?

[Nevfeniel]

Pippin. He was holding it for Frodo while in Moria, and when he threw the "stone" down the well, he was actually ridding himself of the temptation of the ring by dropping it on the balrog's head, and it was lost forever, cuz everyone knows that balrogs never wash their hair. . .
..::Why didn't Elrond want Merry and Pippin to go on the quest with Frodo & co.?::..

[ October 14, 2002: Message edited by: Nevfeniel ]

[Halbereth Diagona]

Cos he wanted to go himself and GIMLI was bad enough.
*******
How did Frodo get the ring?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

It was the novelty in a Christmas cracker.
-----------------------------------------
How many Ents were killed in the storming of Isengard?

[Aramacil]

Every ent was killed exept Treebeard, he was the only one that could escape the woodworm released by Saruman

-----------------------------------

why did Gandalf had a beard?

[Elven Mistress]

He thought it was the only other thing he could do, since he couldn't seem to grow hair on his feet...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is a hobbit's favourite thing to do?

[gralin musicteeth]

moisturize their leathery soles, put dreds in their foot hair, and stir it up with bob when he was smoking lembas. when he was not, they made balloon animals out of spam.

what were the dwarves trying to find when they dug Moria?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

They were trying to build Middle-earth's first underground railway.

Which mountain is "The Cruel"?

[Dagmar of Avalon]

Amon Sul.



What did Galadriel give Gimli?

[Aylwen Dreamsong]

duh! She gave him her favorite teddy bear! Such a heartfelt gift! And Gimli decided to name the bear Goldilocks, for reasons unknown.


How does Galadriel style her hair in the morning?

[NazgulNumberTen]

a comb and hair gel (which is acually troll snot)
----------------------
why was lembas made of poop?

[Susan Delgado]

Oh, thanks NN10, you've just reminded me why I spend as little time as possible with 14-year-old boys smilies/rolleyes.gif

----------------------------

What is Gollum's favorite color and why?

[Taure Leafsilver]

yellow because it remides him of the sun which he loves
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
why did sam follow frodo so faithfuly? ((Oh dear I'm afraid to hear the answer to this one))

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because Frodo had enough evidence to put him away for twenty years. It was to be released to the Shirrifs in the event of Frodo's death.

What is Ted Sandyman's occupation?

[Eruhen]

Don't tell anyone, but he's actually an undercover Elf, keeping both eyes on those foolish hobbits and keeping them in the dark, so the Elves can use them for power. (Sorry, guys. Just watched the Matrix for the fourth time.)

How did Saruman make the Uruk-hai?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

He bought a "Build Your own Hybrid" kit from his local craft shop.

What are the gardens of the Entwives called in the Third Age?

[Bêthberry]

Home and Garden Enterprises.

What is served at FarmerMaggott's table?

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Silly question - maggots, of course!

How did Bilbo rescue the Dwarves from the dungeons of Mirkwood?

[Bêthberry]

No, really, it was dead meat. *grins*

[Birdland]

He got them off on a technicality, after hiring Johnny Cochra-dill-io, the best lawyer in the Four Farthings.

"If the halbrek doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

**********************

Why did Theoden not want to go to war with Saruman?

[Bêthberry]

Theoden did not want to be a 'Saur' loser.

Why did the White Council heed Curunir?

[ October 15, 2002: Message edited by: Bethberry ]

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because he had an honest face.

For how long did Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli pursue the Uruk Hai?

[ October 15, 2002: Message edited by: Squatter of Amon Rudh ]

[Precioussss]

101 days.it started as a nature walk North, but they got sidetracked because Gimli wanted to stop and pick some buttercups. Legolas threw a hissyfit because he broke a nail, and Aragorn had to act as a ref in the middle earth rugby championship that was played in Fangorn forest. it turned out that Merry and Pippin were playing in the game, so they were all reunited in the refreshment tent.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Why were Tom's boots yellow?

[NazgulNumberTen]

he couldn't make it to the bathroom.
----------------------
why did gimli make a voodoo doll of legolas out of his hair?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

He didn't. He claimed to have done so to force Legolas to stand and fight at Helm's Deep (Legolas is a terrible physical coward).

--------------------------------------------

What service did Eorl the Young perform for Gondor?

[Aramacil]

He actually did nothing at all, he was too damn lazy.
----------------------
If Arwen didn't marry Aragorn, who would be the lucky man?

[Eruhen]

I assume you mean the lucky man who got to marry Aragorn, so I would say Legolas!!!!!


Why did Saruman want the Ring?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

To revive his flagging second-hand jewellery business.

---------------------------------------

How did Gandalf escape from Orthanc?

[Eruhen]

He built a hang-glider and jumped off of the edge.

What were the names of the Three Rings of the Elves?

[Precioussss]

Larry, Curly, and Moe smilies/biggrin.gif


Can Elrond dance?

[gralin musicteeth]

duh he can dance!! he does a mean Macarena with Legolas, and he is currently working on his YMCA routine to do at the Rivendell talent show.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

why does Sam breathe so loud?

[LadyElbereth]

He's gonna be DarthVadar for Halloween and wants to make sure he's got the breathing part down pat.

Question: Why did Beorn REALLY follow Thorin&Co. after leaving his house?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because he'd forgotten to recommend to them his local Chinese restaurant, and he'd promised the owner as a personal favour.

----------------------------------------

Who sold Saruman most of his pipeweed supply?

[Precioussss]

Pippin, of course!! he's got connections in the black market.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Why did the Ents storm Isengard?

[Nevfeniel]

Because Saruman knew several secrets about the ents and was going to tell all of Middle-Earth.
..::Why/how did Frodo get injured at Weathertop?::..

[NazgulNumberTen]

a few too many pints, pipeweed, the finest ladies of bree, it's a recipe for disaster
------------------------------
what kind of faceplate did legolas have on his cell phone?

[hobbitlass]

Shiny and reflective, to check himself out.
*******************************************
There were really 11 ringwraiths, what happened to the other two?

[Nevfeniel]

They were too lazy to leave Mordor/Angmar (where do the ringraiths live in their spare time, anyway?), so they let the other nine go without them.
..::How did Gandalf find out that Frodo had the one ring?::..

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

He read it in the gossip column of the Hobbiton Gazette.

---------------------------------

What is a mathom?

[Eruhen]

It's a pet name that Hobbits call things that they love a lot; for instance, if Frodo had kept the Ring for much longer, he probably would have called it his 'mathom', like Gollum called it his 'precioussssssssssssssssssssss'.

Who was the original Dark Lord of ME?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Groucho Marx

--------------

What was Helm's nickname?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Helm Hammerhead smilies/biggrin.gif

What became of the three elven rings after the one ring was destroyed?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Vilya turned bright purple and began to make butterflies appear at random;
Narya metamorphosed into a Monopoly house and Nenya started to make irritating noises.

The custodians of the Three donated them to a charity jumble sale by common consent.

------------------------------------

Where is the Hall of Fire?

[Eruhen]

Go out your front door, turn right, go straight for about 500 miles, then turn around 10 times quickly, and then dig a hole 1 mile straight down. It's right there! (Or it was the last time I checked. It moves sometimes.)

What was Gollum before he found the Ring?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

A chartered accountant.
------------------------
Who were the Wainriders?

[Dagmar of Avalon]

They were a group of nomadic insurace salesmen.


Why doesn't Gandalf want people to know he has a elven ring?

[Glorfinniel the Lost]

Gandalf wanted to cash in on it at the local Cash Converters and keep the cash for himself...rings exchange well for thousands of bucks smilies/biggrin.gif

For the Legolas lovers:Why didn't Legolas have a wife?

[hobbitlass]

Because he had a husband smilies/evil.gif
*********************************************

What makes the dwarves beard grow so long?

[TolkienGurl]

Rogaine

http://smilies.networkessence.net/ups/kamikaze/smilie_switch.gif

Why did Arwen give up her immortality?

[ October 19, 2002: Message edited by: TolkienGurl ]

[Lady_of_lothlorien]

Because she wanted to get senior-citizen discounts

what were the sillmarills (forgive the spelling) REALLY made of?

[ October 19, 2002: Message edited by: Lady_of_lothlorien ]

[Elven Mistress]

Old cheese...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is the approximate number of hobbits living in Hobbiton? (forgive all my spelling errors, please!)

[TolkienGurl]

Elven Mistress - you didn't spell anything wrong! smilies/smile.gif

Anyway: 123,456,789 hobbits live in Hobbiton at this time.

Why is Gollum so wrinkly and gross? (can't think right now...)

[ October 19, 2002: Message edited by: TolkienGurl ]

[Foxy_Nazgul13]

a)Because hes very old

q)What are the Istari

[Childlike Empress]

hors doevres

--------------------

Why was Sam so keen on seeing the Elves?

[hobbitlass]

Because Sam has never met chain-smoking chocaholics.
************************************************** ***
What or who is the Watcher in the Water's roommate?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Ever since Graham the Perch got sick of doing all the washing up, it's lived in solitary squalor.

----------------------------------------

How did Gandalf inform the Fellowship that he had been on Weathertop?

[Nevfeniel]

While he was up there, he threw down some flares, hoping they would see them. He also left a big banner that said "Gandalf was Here!"
..::When did Frodo first succomb to the power of the ring?::..

[Elven Mistress]

Lol, that shows how bad of a speller i REALLY am....

Frodo was never under the power of the ring - it was really Sam. You see, when Frodo and Sam started going up with Gollum, they decided to switch places. They quickly traded hair and eyes and names, of course! So it was never Frodo who was under the power...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What powers did the ring hold?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

It made anything that its bearer touched turn into butterscotch. Sauron really liked butterscotch.
----------------------------------------

What is the name of Théoden's horse?

[Birdland]

Well, he was a white horse, so of course they called him Bert. Though after the events of the Pelennor Fields, his name was changed to Dead Weight.

*******************

What did Frodo dream of in Bombadil's house?

[Elven Mistress]

The Horse (he wasn't very imaginative)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What was Legolas's favourite food?

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

What did Frodo dream of in Bombadil's house?

Something with an axe-wielding carrot chasing him through a library, only all of the books were made out of fondant icing, and they were all How to Win Friends and Influence People. And the librarian was a penguin in a top hat.
I know this because it's all in the dream diary that he kept for his psychiatrist (HoME XV).

--------------------------------------------

What was Legolas's favourite food?

By a strange and possibly sinister coincidence, it was butterscotch fondant icing.

-------------------------------------------

What is a common Hobbit expression for some bizarre or unbelievable piece of information?

[Nevfeniel]

They use both "jinkies" and "zoinks" to a great extent.
..::Why did the trolls have such a hard time figuring out how to cook Bilbo and the Dwarves?::..

[The Squatter of Amon Rûdh]

Because they were all great gourmets. Each had very particular ideas about how to prepare Dwarf and Hobbit, but before they could decide whether to flambée, sauté or pot-roast their meal they realised that they hadn't yet visited the new local Tuscan restaurant. The problem was solved and Thorin et al were released.

--------------------------------------------
Who or what are the Ainur?

[TolkienGurl]

The monsters under my bed.

Why did the King of the Ringwraiths stab Frodo?

[Birdland]

Who or what are the Ainur?
Ainur was a contraction of the original term "Arda Nerds". These were primordial spirits who were so facinated with the doings on Arda that they would spend endlness hours "playing" with Eru's creations, conducting mock battles (which were very real to the combatants, but just harmless fun to the Arda Nerds). They would also spend an inordinate amount of time discussing their favorite characters, their motivations, what color their hair was, and whether their wings worked. They also enjoyed dressing up as their favorite Elf, Dwarf, or Man on festive occasions.

Aulë was the leader of the Arda Nerds. Tulkas was his bitter enemy, who used to make fun of Aulë and shove him around in the Halls of Mandos.

[ October 20, 2002: Message edited by: Birdland ]