The Barrow Downs Newspaper

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Okay, I'm going to suggest we stop this thread from becoming a cat-dog argument.

Read the intro post to the thread.


Now, if we could start looking at some NEWS instead, then the squirrels will leave us alone.

[Diamond18]

The NAACP looked like a worthy cause at first, but then I noticed that Bucky Katt is not the president, or even a member, which severely damages its credibility in my eyes. As for me and mine, we shall follow Bucky's vision for world domination through violence and maulings.

In fact, look for more Downer articles in future chronicling our efforts.

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Diamond18

The NAACP looked like a worthy cause at first, but then I noticed that Bucky Katt is not the president, or even a member, which severely damages its credibility in my eyes. As for me and mine, we shall follow Bucky's vision for world domination through violence and maulings.

In fact, look for more Downer articles in future chronicling our efforts.

Bucky Katt was a member of the NAACP up until 2006, at which time he attempted a coup of the organization. Unfortunately, he was thwarted in his ambitions when he made the mistake of letting his dog companion Satchel in on the plot. Satchel, misunderstanding the word 'coup', locked Bucky in a henhouse with a bunch of chickens. He was captured by animal control authorities and sent to the local pound. Paying the penalty for his foiled revolution (as well as being out of the house without a leash or proper license), Bucky was neutered by a nearsighted veterinarian. He hasn't been the same since; in fact, he currently spends most of his time in his plush Hollywood digs eating lasagna with Garfield.

[TheGreatElvenWarrior]

Originally Posted by Morthoron

Bucky Katt was a member of the NAACP up until 2006, at which time he attempted a coup of the organization. Unfortunately, he was thwarted in his ambitions when he made the mistake of letting his dog companion Satchel in on the plot. Satchel, misunderstanding the word 'coup', locked Bucky in a henhouse with a bunch of chickens. He was captured by animal control authorities and sent to the local pound. Paying the penalty for his foiled revolution (as well as being out of the house without a leash or proper license), Bucky was neutered by a nearsighted veterinarian. He hasn't been the same since; in fact, he currently spends most of his time in his plush Hollywood digs eating lasagna with Garfield.

Poor Bucky!

But anyway, if all of the cat lovers are going to write and article for The Downer, then who's going to do it? Can I tape The Phantom to the wall and let the cats attack?

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Why am I not mentioned this week?

I hate this newspaper!

[Morthoron]

Originally Posted by Rune Son of Bjarne

Why am I not mentioned this week?

I hate this newspaper!

Perhaps you should have mentioned you were playing the part of Rum Tum Tugger in a musical...

http://images.google.com/images?sour...num=1&ct=title

[Nerwen]

Letter to the Editor

Dear Sir/Madam,

I wish to bring to your attention the fact that your article* "Why Are Cats So Evil" falls short of The Downer's usual high standard of journalism by failing to address the wide spectrum of feline morality.

Studies have shown that malevolence is strongly linked to coat-colour. Levels are lowest among dark-coloured or tabby cats** and increase as pigmentation is reduced. Pure evil is found only amongst white cats*** such as the unpleasant specimen in the attached image, pictured while planning its latest world domination attempt.

I trust that future articles will present a more accurate picture of the extensive and completely unbiased research into this vitally important issue.

Yours Sincerely,

Nerwen,
Director,
White Cats Must Die Institute.

*Or headline, whatever.
**Like mine, by a strange coincidence.
***Like my brother's, by an even stranger coincidence.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Originally Posted by Rune Son of Bjarne

Why am I not mentioned this week?

I hate this newspaper!

Rune, you didn't get an article this week because of all the money you spent on those ridiculous adverts you insisted we put in--to the Newspaper. Honestly, they get in the way a bit.