Monty Python's "There and Back Again"

[Bêthberry]

Frodo, aka Silly Walker: I have a silly walk and I'd like to obtain a Gondor grant to develop it.

Boromir: Now wait a minute. One does not simply silly walk into Gondor.

Frodo: Well, you're obviously the cruel heartless bastard.

Elrond: Behold Frodo's Bane!

Boromir: Now wait a minute. I was not sent to spend any money, simply to seek the meaning of a riddle.

Sam: *off side* I"m the sweet, slightly ineffective lower middle class one.

Frodo: Four hundred years ago Isildur died for want of a silly walk. Now I'm suggesting we make an advance.

Aragorn: An advance? One does not simply make silly advances to lovely ladies.

Gimli: You learnt that when she turned you into a newt?

Aragorn: Oyi, but I got better.

Frodo: It's my duty as the Silly Walker to sample as much peril as I can.

Gandalf: Okay, but it'll only be a flesh wound.

exit stage left, followed by a little bit of peril