Fortunately/Unfortunately

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Rune got a little tipsy from having one to many drinks.

Nice to have you back my friend! :D

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, Rune got no near as drunk as Gandalf who ended up challenging the hobbits to a game of Limbo !

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, they used Gandalf's staff as the Limbo poll and everyone who tried it got turned into something... unnatural.

[Farael]

Fortunately they were mostly turned into either fluffy, cute, cuddly little puppies or sweet, funny and also cuddly little penguins

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, cuddly little penguins despise anything else fluffy, cute, cuddly, sweet and funny and started slaughtering the other unnatural beeings.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, they had no means of killing each other and could only manage head butting at best.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, that headbutting was rather painful...especially since one of the things they headbutted against was a Balrog.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, well, sort of, they hurt their heads headbutting the balrog and were set on fire.

[Parmawen]

Unfortunately, since the Balrog was made of fire, it took no heed and continued mercilessly headbutting the penguins and puppies, whose fur burned off.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Penguins don't have fur, they have feathers.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, they have very furry feathers.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, they jumped into the ocean.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, so did the Watcher in the Water! :eek:

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, The Watcher in the Water jumped for such a great distance that the impact killed it.

[Brinniel]

Unfortunately, there were some very hungry Corsairs sailing the ocean.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately a bunch of Seagulls beat the penguins and ths the Corsairs hunger was satisfied.

[Brinniel]

Unfortunately, since all the penguins' furry feathers had been burned off, they began to grow very cold in that ocean water.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, they jumped out.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately they jumped into the maw of
The Watcher's avenging girlfriend.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, the girlfriend wasn't evil. She was a loving, caring gardener.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately she had multiple personalities and became rather pyscho from time to time

[Brinniel]

Fortunately, the penguins were able to escape from her and take refuge in Lorien.

[aredhelthewhite]

Unfortunately the penguins took over Lorien and something strange has happened to the elves...where have they gone? :p

[Brinniel]

Fortunately, Legolas and Gimli took over Lorien and killed all the penguins.

[Beorn]

Fourtunately Landroval was there to catch him after he was dropped

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, nobody cared as there where this really cool party going on in Dunland.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the 'cool' party was held in the Antarctic and included many Penguins

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, they were evil penguins and invaded Middle-Earth!

[Thinlómien]

Fortunately, all the evil penguins had as sensitive conscience as the werepenguin Naria Chinstrap, and like her, they all cast themselves to a gorge.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately Johnny the Stinky and un-killable Balrog was nearby and use his awesomeness to save the penguins and make them his own personal Penguin army (Royal Balrog Penguin Corp or RBPC)

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, he ran into Elrond the Swindler and not only did he give him his penguin army, but he also ended up owing him a pair of mithril socks and 10.000 barrels of snow.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately, One Penguin was not given and he was the worst one of all, for he was THE PENGUIN OF DEATH

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v242/IceColdChick/em_cardpenguin.jpg

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, he had eaten so much at the party that he was too fat to move.

[Brinniel]

Unfortunately, one of the 412 ways he can kill you is through his mind power.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately the Penguin of Death had a very
bad sense of direction and accidentally
killed himself when his mind power boomeranged. :eek:

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, this caused a chain reaction that turned Arda into a giant cheeseburger.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

fortunately it was a very delicious cheese burger

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, the only person big enough to eat it was Eru, and he was on a diet.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately the giant cheeseburger was very well done,
so Eru used it as the basis for a new Middle-earth
(and one that was vera delicious).

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, all the peoples, animals and beings of the new Arda ate the new Arda.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, the new Arda regenerated.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the part that regenerated turned into a place full of evil dragons.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, Good-Evil Dragon eaters also emerged and set the balance in order

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, The Good-Evil Dragon eaters became too fat and upset the balance quite literally.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately the dragons joined Weight Watchers
and rereset the balance.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, this was all some wierd, messed up dream that Eru was having when he fell asleep half way through his favorite tv show, The Hottest Steward.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, everything in Middle-Earth was a lot better off in reality.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Eru's wrath was induced when the producers of The hottest Steward made a special device that sets the viewer's television / palantir / whatever on fire when the season finally finished.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately for Eru, it turned out he had a
controlling interest in The Hottest Steward and
told the current producers: "You're Fired!"

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the new producers were just the old producers in disguise.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Frodo had reached Mount Doom and was about to drop the Ring in the fire while all this arguing over TV shows was going on.

[mark12_30]

Unfortunately, nobody back in the Shire had a clue as to why Frodo's actions were important at all.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Sam sat them all down and lectured them all on Frodo's actions.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately nobody came cause that wasn't 'hip' and sam was a geek anyways so they made fun of him so Sam ran away to join with Johnny the Stinky Balrog

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, the 'hip' Shire sub-culture changed to accomadate Sam.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately the 'hip' Shire sub-culture was taken in by
Lotho's idea of purchasing the Green Dragon and turning
it into a retro disco with Rosie as the lead attraction.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, this attracted Boromir the Disco King to the scene and he told everyone of Frodo and Sam's heroic deeds.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, this was impossible as Boromir was, by this time, dead.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, he was now a Barrow Wight.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, he got lost on the way and ended up in the Barrow-Downs, where we all posted him out of existence.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, to us 'out of existence' basically means going to Tim Hortons to pick up coffee for the barrowdowning gang

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Gil forgot that not everyone would know about Tim Horton's as it is a Canadian restaurant.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Enough of the canadian Downers knew

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the canadian downer population was 3 wights.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, the Canadian Downers managed to explain it to the rest of us.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the ground opened up and swallowed everyone.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, as everyone was alreday Wights, nobody noticed. After all, they did live in the ground as it is.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, it happened to be a Balrog's lair.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately it was Johnny the stinky balrog's lair, and everyone had crumpets and tea and played Twister, trying to beat the 17-time champion... Gil-Galad

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately (for Gil-Galad, that is), Johnny the Stinky Balrog accidentally sat on Gil-Galad and squished him.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Gil-Galad was very durable.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog did not find it comfortable sitting on Gil and so decided to destroy him.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, none of this mattered as Gil-Galad was already dead.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, even his Wight form was gone.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately, Bill and Ted decided to have another
excellent adventure with The Grim Reaper and
brought Gil-Galad back.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the Grim Reaper touched all of them and they died.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Johnny, being invinceible, ate the Grim Reaper and absorbed his powers thus becoming Johnny the Stinky Balrog Grim Reaper

[mark12_30]

Unfortunately, a small fellow cloaked in grey stood on the bridge, waved his staff, and said "You shall not pass."

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, this part turned out to happen just like it did in the books: bridge breaks, balrog falls, whips whip which wraps around the small figure and ends up draggin it down with it. :D

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the ground was only about ten feet below the bridge.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, this was a good thing for Gandalf.

[mark12_30]

Unfortunately it was quite deucedly awkward for Roggie, and his eyeliner got badly smudged.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately there was a makeup store nearby

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, the store burned down as Johnny the Stinky Balrog ran by crying his pain after being rejected by a lady Balrog.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately Johnny the Stinky Balrog cheered up when he
learned that the lady balrog was actually a drag queen.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, this made him feel ill and he was sick all over Gandalf.

[mark12_30]

Eeeewww.

Fortunately there was a well nearby.

[Glirdan]

Gross!!

Unfortunately, it was a dry well.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, A water beast came from the abyss and filled the well up nicely.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog came and dried up the well again.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Johnny left and it started raining right as he left

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it was acid rain.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, there was a magic filter right under the clouds, which turned the acid rain into normal rain.

[Boromir88]

Of The History of the Magic Filter drain and the Untold Story of Balin's reclaim of Moria:

The Magic Filter drain was installed by the Dwarves in some year way back a long time ago in Moria. It was encoded with protecting Runes engraved, for some unbeknownst (ya I made it up) reason by Celebrimbor. The inscription on the filter asked 3 randomized questions to a dwarf only and if he said the correct answer the filter was turned on, if not it imploded. After the Balrog had drove the dwarves out of Moria the Magic Filter went into lockdown and shut itself down. When Balin reclaims Moria for the dwarves, he goes to get the Magic Filter back on and running....unfortunately when he was asked the last question 'What is the average wingspan of a bee?' and he replied, 'Do you mean Bumble or Killer?' The filter was totally confused and imploded blowing a giant crater in the ground of what used to be Moria.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately, in an as yet undiscovered letter by JRRT
he stated that Middle-earth theory would follow a
future concept that would be developed in the late 20th and early
21st centuries that there were many alternate worlds in
higher dimensions, and the Moria destroyed was replaced
by on e of the Durin's (leaving a thank you note) from one
of these alternate worlds.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the letter fell in the fire.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, everyone was magically transported into Mary Poppins where the letter reformed itself.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the inside of Mary Poppins is not a very nice place.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Johnny used his Grim Reaper powers to end Mary Poppins life for the better

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, Mary Poppins's cousin Merry Pippins showed up and made the Johnny into a really nice coat.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, the johnny coat devoured them and made himself renewed

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, this was a bad thing.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Eru got fed up and changed the chanel on to Middle-Earth Idol where it was down to the final 6.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunatley Johnny came and devoured Eru's TV too! :eek:

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

fortunately, Merry Pippins dropped by and gave Johnny the punishment he deserved.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, the punishment was in fact rewarding him with a cookie.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Johnny Loved cookies and he went on his merry way

[Síredol]

Unfortunately, Johnny suddenly became allergic to cookies. :rolleyes:

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Johnny got some very good allergy medicine.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, it was so good that Johnny just had to have more and more and more and more and more and. . . .

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, the ODing effect of the allergy medicine only lasted a 4.628 seconds.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, none of this mattered because he still ended upp dieing on the OD.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately Eru had become so addicted to his TV he reincarnated Johnny and 'commanded' that he give up his TV.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the TV exploded.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately Eru picked up an almost new
tv/dvd at the Orthanc firesale after Saruman went out of
business. This was cheap because Elessar decided:
"Everything has to go..." and that his prices were "INSANE!"

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the reason Saruman went out of business (besides the 'INSANE' prices) was the quality of products were below the Federal Rohirric Consumer's Commission standards...so long story short the TV Eru got...blew up.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Eru, being omnipotent, just created another one on the spot.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, this one was evil.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, it also blew up.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, everyone knows when evil TV's created by the all powerful Eru blow up just creates hundreds of thousands little evil TV's.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, this gave Eru a headache.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, due to the life that is cross-posting, the 'fortunate' that usually follows the 'unfortunate' was entirely skipped over. This proved that Eru's master designs could be broken and he wasn't in control of everything. Knowing this all the Valar and Maiar were tired of being bossed around, so them and all the people's of Middle-earth went into mass rebellion against Eru. Mandos freed Morgoth from the Void and appointed him as the leader. :breathes:

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, this created a massive time-space continuum paradox that even Einstein couldn't figure out, which started destroying all of Arda. This forced the Valar to restore Eru to power and banish Morgoth to the Void again.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately, Eru decided the way to settle all this
confusion was to replace the Music of the Vala
with the best hits of Barry Manilow. :eek:

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Barry Manilow doesn't exist in Middle-Earth.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Eru was the biblical representative of our God and therefor could make any whim of his come true.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Eru didn't want Barry Manilow but instead the musical stylings of U2

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, this still left Middle-Earth pretty weird.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Frodo still managed to make it to Mordor.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, as soon as he made it into Mordor, he was caught.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately he was caught by the eagles who decided to fly over Mount Doom at a slow pace enough for frodo to drop the ring in

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, they dropped Frodo in as well.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, at that exact moment, a Nazgul was flying by (he snuck out to get something to eat) and Frodo landed on him.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the Nazgul took Frodo (and the Ring) to Sauron.

[Elrowen Tinúviel]

Fortunately, Aragorn showed up, and Anduril terrified Sauron so much, he fled... leaving behind the Ring.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, Aragorn mistook the ring for a cheerio and ate it.

[Farael]

Fortunately he choked on it and Pippin did the Hei... Hel.... Heilm... Hem... that thing where you press the guy's chest... and Aragorn spat the ring out.

[Gandalf_the _white]

Unfortunately pippins heimlick (spl?) thingie ( :D ) was too good and the ring ended up in a river

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, it was a unholy river of acid, killing anyone or destroying anything that entered it.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the Ring was unaffected because it could only be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom.
EDIT: My 1337th post! ;)

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

fortunately, Meneltarmacil's 1337th post was celbrated by throwing the ring into the fires of Mount Doom.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, this ring was actually a Cheerio.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately that is what Sauron made the ring out of

[Gandalf_the _white]

Unfortunately this was the wrong cheerio ring

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately the right cheerio ring disappeared
into the 3,568,923 rings in a giant box of cheerios
Fatty Bolger kept for snacks.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the Nazgul got the box when they attacked Fatty at Crickhollow.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Cheerios are the Nazguls worst enemy and they threw it into Mt.Doom

[Gandalf_the _white]

Unfortunately Aragorn does like cheerios and catches the box and starts eating through them

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Aragorn ate so many ring cheerios he had a heart attack and died...Cheerios good for your heart...psshh. :p

[Gandalf_the _white]

Unfortunately that wasn't a fortunate thing to happen as there was now no king!? :eek:

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, the people crowned some random guy named Bob as king.

[Gandalf_the _white]

unfortunately bob was Sauron in diguise :eek:

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, finding out this mistake the real King Bob and his Elf Friend Phil-Falad challenged Sauron to an arm wrestling match and beat him. Sauron made an oath to never bother Middle-earth again.

[Gandalf_the _white]

Unfortunately, Sauron is EVIL and broke his oath, he made a new ring and it started all over again aarrrrrgggggghhhhhhh! :eek:

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, It took sauron so long to make another ring that everyone else had tanks, and machine guns and what-not

[Ordimor]

Unfortunately, No one knew how to operate the tanks, machine guns and what-not so they just hung tealights from them and had wonderful parties.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, they ran out of tea.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately they now had no more use for their tanks, machine guns, and what-nots so they sold them to Sauron.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately the dwarves made all the good guys mithril
flak suits which were so strong they sent Sauron's
tank, etc. materiel bouncing back and this destroyed
his armies.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately this destroyed the good guys armies too so the only one who can win now is...the Evil Penguin Army

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, the Evil Penguin Army was controlled by our own Lommy. :D :p ;)

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately, she intended to use it for evil purposes, and the only own who can raise an army to battle Her would be me, but i consider myself a Benevolent-ish ruler who sees nothing else to do but join Lommy.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortuntately, Eru appeared to set everything to rights.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, he died due to a freak accident involving a flashlight, an outboard motor, and a great deal of duct tape (don't ask).

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately it was an imposter who died, regardless of what Nietzsche said. :D

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, the real Eru was disgusted at this being one of the 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 works out there in which people wrote themselves into the story, and he killed everyone in a horrible, R-rated attack.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately Eru recounted and found that instead
of 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 works there were
only 999,999,999,999,999,999 of those works so
he changed his mind, made the attack GP rated
and everyone had a nice time at a partee on Tol Eressea
(except Feanor, who made such a pest of himself bugging
Gimli for snips of Galadriel's hair that he was sent back
to the Halls of Waiting without any of the nice desert cake).

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately, nobody here knows math and/or economics, so we now start off in a lovely scene with a tree...and a alligator...next to a man...in a purple shirt...

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, the man in the purple shirt was plotting to take over the world and would have succeeded, but the alligator ate him, preventing that from happening.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, the aligator was made out of grass roots and that realy confused everybody.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, everybody jsut decided to eat the roots. That way they wouldn't be confused anymore.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the roots gave everybody a heart attack.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, they all loved their heart attack and they played with them for hours. . .

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately out of everyones heart attacks grew and spawned Ungoliant.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Ungoliant was so small and weak that she actually starved to death moments later.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately Shelob had just been (born? spawned?)
and enjoyed a delicious giant spider first meal.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately that only included a dirty toe-nail

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately Shelob's giant toenail was packed
with vitamins and minerals and was vera nourishing.

[Volo]

Fortunately it also included bananas to which Shelob was allergic

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, Shelob had an all-purpose allergy pill.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortuantely Ungoliant doesn't do drugs and is a strong supported of the anti-drug movement


(you do realize we turned from ungoliant into shelob)

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately Shelob's strength and conditioning
coach (and we knows who that is, don't we
preciouss?) told her it was just a vitamin pill and she took it.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Shelob actually didn't exist in this story, we were orignally talking about Ungoliant and some people got confused, but now its all Ungoliant

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Oops!

Unfortunately Ungoliant's strength and conditioning
coach (Morgoth)
told her it was just a vitamin pill and she took it.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, it had the reather unpleasant side effect of making her head explode.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, the confusing events in this story were actually the cause of DC totally murdering their continuity again, thus resulting in a marring of continuity so horrific that all of Middle-Earth had its continuity destroyed. In a second, all of the odd things building up over the weeks came together. The One Ring became a cheerio, Shelob was the same spider as Ungoliant, A million werewolf games sprang up in a day (it's usually a billion,) all the reps made to cry rivers actually turned into rivers, Anduril somehow became Elrond's sword, Huan turned out to be spanish, All the characters in the new survivor were actually poorly made clones created by EA, and people spent all their time being complete pricks and claiming that Eru didn't exist even when they had the worst arguements ever.

Finally, this post was so large that this thread got a clogged artery and had a heart attack.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, this thread was a pheonix and afterits heart attack death, it began anew like this

Fortunately, Gimli finally found something to eat

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately it began with a murder.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, Gimli was a respected Cannibal and everyone understood his ways

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, he didn't share.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Mount Zoom ran over him.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately cannabalistic dwarves are also famously
noted for their appetites and Gimli ate Mount Zoom.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Mount Zoom was instantly repaired by massive hordes of orcs.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, it Imploded Immediately afterwards.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the black hole it created caused a rip in the time space continuum and via a large number of incredibly improbable coincidences and random sciencey things, Mount Zoom was fully functional once again.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it got zapped into an alternate universe where Man created buildings 50 storey's high and there was no such thing as Elves, Dwarves, Hobbits, Orcs, Urkhai, Wizards and Ents. :p

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately that Alternate universe also had an Alternate-Unvierse Portal to bring Mount Zoom back

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, Mount Zoom never came back because it suddenly combusted. Later, it was learned that the higher powers of the world made this happen because Mount Zoom appeared far too much and had turned from something cool into a sell-out.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately Eru felt sorry for Mount Zoom and
rooted it on an island just offshore of Aman where
it became a popular casino gambling resort for
stay-at-home elvsees who wanted a cheap thrill
despite not having Noldor drive to see the wider world.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, the gambling corrupted the elves and they all turned into orcs.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, they were good orcs.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, that oxy-moron destroyed Middle-Earth again.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, the Original OXyMoron(Perky) saved it on the brink of destruction

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, Saruman cut Perky down and made him into a table and a set of chairs.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately the dinet set made of Perky wood, was exsquisite, one of a kind, so of course Eru put it up for auction on ebay.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, it was too expensive.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, he forgot to put a reserve on it and someone bought it for a shilling.

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, this person was actually Sauron.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Frodo and Sam managed to sneak into Mordor with the Ring while Sauron was occupied with buying the entish dining room set.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, it really wasn't Mordor, the Hobbits were walking in front of a giant Green Screen.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, the giant Green Screen could fly and carried Sam and Frodo into Mordor.

[TomTheBomb]

Unfortunately; it broke on the way and they fell in front of the armies of Mordor.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, they didn't know the dire importance of capturing these two hobbits for their master...so the Mordor army fixed the flying Green Screen and sent Frodo and Sam back on their way.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately Frodo gave the Ring to the orc army in payment
for fixing the Green Screen.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, The Orc army gave the ring to a cave-troll in payment for that weed problem, while the troll gave the ring to the eagle in payment of taking the troll's mutant-dog for a walk, and the eagle gave the ring to Johnny the Stinky Balrog™ in payment for staying away from their eeries

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately, Johnny swore permanent allegiance to Sauron.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Sauron burnt the contract when he looked too closely at it.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately, Saruman had a notarized agreement, signed by
Johnny, that he had second call on any Ring of Power Johnny got
if anyone else botched an opportunity to obtain it.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortuantley Saruman is just a jerk and nobody really likes him so they never listen to what he says

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, this had a long history. Saruman final broke under the pressure and vowed to 'destroy all of Middle Earth' until he was taken seriously. Put that one in the papers!

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately, Eru wrote Saruman a "Dear Wizard"
letter in which he pointed out the logical flaw in
Saruman's threat. If Saruman 'destroy(ed) all of Middle Earth' until he was taken seriously then there wouldn't be any Middle-earth
to take him seriously. :)

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, Saruman caused Eru's head to explode somehow, which led to the annihilation of the entire universe.

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Eru was immune to Saruman's head-exploding powers.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately, Wormtongue wasn't, so in frustration
Saruman exploded him to Edoras, Minas Tirith, Bagend,
the Lonely Mountain, Mount Doom, etc. :eek:

[Rikae]

Fortunately, Wormtongue replaced his head with the palantir.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, it tuned out not to be a Palantir, but some dirt pressed together in a ball.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately that was how the Palantirs were made

[High King Fingolfin]

Unfortunately the dirt didn't bond correctly into a Palantir.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, it still worked as a head repacement.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, they were actual severed heads that swore at people.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately, they only swore in an obscure orcish dialect
which only Celebrian could understand (picked up during
her time with nassty orcsees).

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, it made her relapse and she had to go back to the Valinor Institute of Trauma.

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Fortunately, Celebrian did so well at the Valinor Institute of Trauma
that she earned a doctorate in Psychology and Trauma Treatment
and began to treat Feanor.

[Volo]

Unfortunately, Feanor was mad and had rabies.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, so did the random werewolf that jumped out and ate him.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately, they merged creating the super awesome power of Were-Feanor

[High King Fingolfin]

Fortunately, Were-Feanor became good and single-handedly carried Frodo to Mount Doom thereby destroying Sauron.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Mount Doom always seemed just out or reach... some how...

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Mount Doom turned into Mount Zoom, zoomed all over the country and became in reach.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, it ran over Frodo.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Frodo didn't have the Ring, the Eagle carrying Frodo did.

[Meneltarmacil]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/Zoom.jpg Vroom!

Unfortunately, Mount Zoom drove faster than the Eagle could fly.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately Mount Zoom wasn't paying attention to where it was going and ran head on into Minas Taxi.

[Volo]

Unfortunately (or really fortunately for some) Minas Taxi dodged Mount Zoom by just a few sentimeters.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Mount Zoom rammed into Minas Taxi repeatedly because Sauron was drunk at the wheel.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately (depending on who you are,) Both vehicles exploded, thus ending this too old and no longer funny running joke.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately, Gandalf ran by uncloaked again, but only to be mauled down by Were-Feanor the Forgotten, thus the people of M-E made Were-Feanor their new king after realsing them from the tryanny of Gandalf's uncloakness9and ending yet another runing joke)

[Tuor in Gondolin]

Unfortunately Were-Feanor the Forgotten hadn't forgotten
about Galadriel and threatened to lead a band of uberwargs
into Lorien if Galadriel didn't give him SIX!!!!!! strands of her hair
(and the directions to Gimli's abode). :eek:

[Volo]

Fortunately Galadriel shaved her head bare just yesterday, so Feanor retreated in disappointment.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately not after Were-feanor mauled galadriel and celeborn out of randomness