Fortunately/Unfortunately

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately since they were the only one alive, they decidet that they infact were the good guys.

[Eonwe]

Unforetunately (for the bad guys) they weren't the only ones left when the valar decided to repopulate midde-earth with the desendents of finarfin.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, the descendents of Finarfin were infact evil and the "Evil Guys" are actually good.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Unfortunately, Eorl of Rohan, who thinks this is all too confusing babble of goodness being evil being goodness being evil being go- and so on, was soon tired of this paradoxical discussion, took a part-time job at Eru Demolishment Inc. and wiped out all source of debatement on this point - which happened to be everyone.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Eru thought this most unfair and quite frankly silly. So he decided to put everything to rights... but Gimli still didn't have anything to eat.

[Kath]

Unfortunately Gimli had already died from hunger.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Fortunately Gimli, who had already died of decapitation once, could not die twice, so he had not died.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . due to his multiple encounters with death, he became Lord of the Netherworld. Using an army of zombie-Dwarves, he ousted Mandos from . . . err . . . Mandos.

[Hiriel]

Fortunately, Mandos was rather bored with his job anyway, so he started devoting his newfound free time to opening a chain of luxury beach resorts.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . he built his resorts on the shores of Ekkaia, and all who tried to swim fell to the bottom of the sea, where they were devoured by Ulmo's fishy car.

[Hiriel]

Fortunately, Ulmo's fishy car was famed for it's road trips, and spat all it's victems out on the more hospitable shores of Dol Amroth after a particularly nasty gas station burrito.

[Eonwe]

Unforetunately, that nasty roadside burito cuased ulmo's fishy car to engage in an equally nasty sting of hit and run accidents.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Chief Wiggum was on the case and Ulmo got away while Manwe took ballet!!! *Groans* :rolleyes: I couldn't resist!!!

[Eonwe]

unfortunenately (for the dance teacher, fortunatly for us), ulmo ran over manwe's ballet teacher, setting the poor valar straight. after ulmo took manwe into the smoking room and had a very long, long solemn chat with him, manwe promised never to dance ballet again.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately Grima Wormtongue was turned into an earthworm.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, so was everyone else in Middle-Earth.

P.S. congrats on your 300th post in this thread Hookbill!!!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Gandalf turned everyone (except Grima) back to normal.

P.s. yes, I just noticed. Oh, Tra, la, la, lallly!

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Saruman made Grima the Earthworm grow 2,000 times bigger and Grima the Earthworm ate Gandalf.

[arcticstorm]

Forunately Gandalf used Glamdiring to cut his way out of Grima's belly.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Unfortunately, everyone knows that earthworms multiply if chopped into pieces, each piece with one's own life, and now there were one-hundred-seventy-three pieces of Grima who all scattered over middle earth to eat up everyone else.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Eru lost his mind again and smote them all.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Eru smote the wrong 'them all.' Arda was on the other side of the Timeless Halls.

[Lhunardawen]

Fortunately, Nilpaurion Felagund was just looking at a mirror, so Eru smote the right "them all" after all.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, it travelled through the Nilp mirror and into the wrong Arda.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, the last part of this thread never happend (yes I am a Super-Hero and this is my ability!) Gandalf was now standing beside the blody mess formerly known as Grima.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Wormtongue's body bred worms.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, they were good worms that Gandalf used to attack Mordor and Isengard.

[Gil-Galad]

unfortunately they were pitiful weaklings

[Eonwe]

fortunately, it didn't matter, because they used sheer numbers to do what not even the ents could do: break into Orthank!!!!

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Saruman used his voice and convinced them all that they were evil and they should attack Gandalf.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, Gandalf had thought ahead, and as soon as he saw them coming, pressed the red button on the black box that sat on the table in front of him...bam! no worms!

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Legolas was killed in the explosion.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, this meant no more Captain Obvious!! :D

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately a Legolas fangirl arrived in Middle-Earth, at Legolas's grave to be precise.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Gandalf charged very high admission fees for the graveyard of Legolas and so got very rich!

[Gurthang]

Unfortunately, Butters the Squirrel stole all of Gandalf's money.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately Dilbo the world wettest dog, killed Butters the Squirel and brought the money back to Gandalf.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Gandalf lost it all in gambling and drugs.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, the drugs were the Longbottom leaf from the shire and he liked that the most.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, the evil hobbits who didn't like Gandalf laced the Longbottom leaf with arsenic and Gandalf died.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Fortunately, Gandalf died so many times in this thread that he eventually gained immunity from dying.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, he passed his immunity to Saruman, thinking he would use it for good.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately the immunity cannot be passed on. Saruman discovered this when he jumped off Orthanc in a rage after Gwakgrach called him a capitalist pig.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, he landed on a pile of dead Orcs and was unharmed.

[Lord Melkor]

Fortunately the sudden shock of impact caused several of the severely decomposed Orc bodies to explode, covering Saruman with their rotting contents.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Unfortunately, no one dared to attack Saruman, or even get near him, even the most brave of warriors overwhelmed by the stench of rottings orc flesh all over him. Therefore he was free to do whatever he wished.

[Glirdan]

Fortunatetly, Gandalf brought Johnny the Stinky Balrog along and no one could face that stench, not even Saruman and thus, Gandalf was able to control Saruman.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Gandalf was not aware of this, as he'd been smoking all of Saruman's Long bottom leaf.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Pippin was and now was Peregin Took, Overlord of Middle Earth

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately his parachute didn't open when he tried jumping from Orthanc.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately his back up parachute worked. Any experienced sky diver knows to carry backups.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it was an orc in the bag, not a parachute.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the fumes from Gandalf's pipe sent the orc flying back to Mordor!

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Pippin died when he hit the ground.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately there was a mix-up in Mandos' records where Pippin got mistaken for Glorfindel and was reincarnated.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Pippin decided to jump off Orthanc again.

[Gil-Galad]

fortunately he jumped off the first floor into a mountain of pillows

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Gandalf at this very moment was fighting Johnny the Stinky Balrog on top of Orthanc. Johnny fell and landed on Pippin.

[Lord Melkor]

Fortunately, Pippin had bought life ensurance just the day before.

[THE Ka]

Unfortunately, like most insurance companies, their interests tend to be not in the welfare of the mortal envelope but that of the pocketbook, and in doing so, indirectly, but most the cause of, plotted to rid of their new client...


~ Aesthete

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Pippin didn't need the life insurance anyway. Using a bottle of Secret™ substance he dissolved Johnny the Stinky Balrog.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the bottle of Secret substance was tankered with, it dissolved Johnny the Stinky Balrog, but caused a widespread Flu Epedemic.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, all the good guys are immune to the flu. Sauron, Saruman and all those other little badies, well.....

[Lord Melkor]

Unfortunately the flu, being of course created by Melkor, had the effect of enormously increasing the powers of the bad guys.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, it increased their intelligence so much that their heads exploded.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately they grew new heads.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately these Heads were tiny compared to their old ones and blew up to follow with the teachings of Darwin

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately, the teachings of Dawin were being debated at the time, so they got confused and regrew into philosophically befuddled and existentially challenged new tiny heads.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, that was a good thing since they were the bad guys.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, today is "Switch Places for a Day" day and therefor, the baddies were the goodies and vice versa.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, the bad guys(turned good for a day) were too busy making fun of Sauron for losing to a dog, and thus they didn't take advantage of this new predicament.

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately for everyone, the dog had swallowed a Silmaril, thus causing a huge, catacylsmic war between the houses of elves, men, and Morgoth to find the poor thing.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Orome found the dog first.

[Lord Melkor]

Unfortunately, the dog, driven mad by the power of the Silmaril, ate Orome alive.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Orome found the Silmaril in Huan's stomach and escaped by climbing through Huan's bowels. Afterwards, Orome pummeled Osse for finding the Silmaril under the sea and feeding it to Huan.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Orome dropped it while he pummelled Osse. The Silmarill rolled to the feet of Sauron! :eek: *dramatic music of doom!*

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Sauron tripped over it and broke his nose on a random statue made of mithril.

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, the statue was exteremely angry, and after stabbing sauron with its sword, took the silmaril and ran to the hills.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the hills were full of Barrow Wights who attacked and killed the statue.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it was thier day off.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately the Barrow-wights are very reclusive.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the Barrow-wights got drunk in some pub near Nenuial, and they wreaked havoc on much of Eriador, switching everyone's socks and other such abominable deeds.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the Wights (among their abdominal deeds such as doing everyone's crosswords and eating all the biscuits) did actually beat up the statue and get the Silmarill.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, the statue got RETRIBUTION! (ahemGlirdan)

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, this RETRIBUTION came in the form of raiding. He lead a band of statues on a campain to lay waste to all the barrow-down and steal all their treasure.

[Lord Melkor]

Unfortunately the statues were so large they got stuck inside the barrows and the nefarious wights tickled them mercilessly. Oh, the humanity of it all!

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, statues are ticklish. :p

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, a large foot stomped on everyone and squished them flat.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, statues are ticklish.
Just a clarification, that's obviously supposed to be "aren't ticklish." :p

So...
Unfortunately, a large foot stomped on everyone and squished them flat.
Fortunately the large foot was Eru embodied as Tom Bombadil, as we all know that that's what Tom was. :p

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, If Eru is Tom, then he's gone crazy.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, everyone is crazy in Middle-Earth, not to mention the Downs. :p

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, because Eru was Tom Bombadil, but really wasn't, so the statues were still raiding. after cleaning out the barrows of the wights, they moved on to the grey havens and saked and burned it all to the ground.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately, the grey havens are right next the the sea, so there was plenty of water to douse the flames.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . 'water' near the Grey Havens was actually 90% pentanol--which Cirdan used to fuel his ships--so the flames grew bigger.

[Lord Melkor]

Fortunately Cirdan had been planning a major overhaul of the Grey Havens, so the fire made his plans of turning the Havens into Middle-Earth's premier holiday resort a lot easier.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it was only him working on it because all the Elves left for Valinor.

[Gil-Galad]

fortunately Cirdan was actually Superman

[Lord Melkor]

Unfortunately, as Cirdan found out while digging the foundations for his resort, the Grey Havens were situated right on top of the Universe's largest deposit of Kryptonite!

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately that Legolas fan girl found her way back to her own time.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, she got stuck in the time warp, her body still in Middle-Earth and her head in the Jurrasic Era where it got eaten by a tyranous saurus rex.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately (for her) tyrannosaurs didn't exist until the Cretaceous period and weren't around during the Jurassic. :smokin:

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Allosauruses did live in the Jurassic period and so ate her. :smokin:

[Kath]

Fortunately this was a good thing! Leggy fan all gone!

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, after the making of the LOTR movies Legolas can just get another one and another one and a . . .

[Glirdan]

Fortuately, no one agreed to this because of what happened to the one girl.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately they all turned into Figwit fangurls!

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Legolas went crazy because of this and shot Figwit.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Legolas was not so attractive as a ghost.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately Figwit was, so even in death he rubbed it in Legolas' face that he was getting all the fangurls.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Legolas's spirit didn't go to Mandos's halls. Therefor he stayed behind and haunted Figwit. Figwit eventually got so annoyed he jumped off of Orthanc without a parachute, purposely.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately the whole thing about the statues going raiding and Superman AKA Cirdan finding the mother-lode of Kryptonite was an imaginary story.

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, it's a fact that Gandalf plays bridge on teh weekends with Elrond and Glorfindil.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately so does the Eye of Sauron, the Mouth of Sauron, Saruman, and the Witch-King.

[Lord Melkor]

Unfortunately the bad guys always cheat at bridge, so the good guys have yet to win a game.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, anyone who cheats... erm... explodes for no reason.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, the explosion was so weak that it ended up as a burp.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, a burp in the mouth of an Orc is deadly!

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, neither Saruman, teh Mouth of Saruon, nor the Witch-King are orcs, so teh burbs really weren't that dangerous after all. but their wicked awesome card tricks are.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, they were all bluffs and they know no card tricks.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog came by and did know many card tricks

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog was hit by a giant meteor falling out of the sky and died instantly.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, he was resurrected seconds later.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, he made a law that said there could be no winged balrog, citing the fact that "it just wouldn't be right." any balrog caught with wing was subjected to being arrested and sent to the lockholes, where the wings were amputated. this healed devisions in tolkien fans the world over.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, the lockholes were filled with Hobbits at the time.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the Hobbits were set free by a mysterious fellow in a blue hat and jacket with yellow boots. Authorities have yet to find out who or what this person was.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, they never found out as the mysterious fellow and the hobbits were burnt into a tiny black crisp by Smaug.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, that's only how it seemed. that mysterious man in yellow boots killed the dragon before any burning to a crisp could be accompished. then he had a drink.

[Glirdan]

Unfrotunately, he was caught and everyone realised it was just Tom. So they tied him up and shucked HIM into the lockholes. :p

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, he killed Johnny the Stinky Balrog.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately before Johnny the stinky Balrog killed Tom, Tom put a curse on him. Declaring Johnny will forever have Tom Bombadillo's song stuck in his head.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, this caused Johnny the Stinky Balrog to go a bit insane. He wandered the countryside singing his song and doing a strange shuffling dance. eventually, a lynch mob led by a bold knihgt erent found him and took care of the problem.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Mandos had to lock up the ghosts of Legolas and Figwit.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, this was a good a thing.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the number of fan emails that Legolas and Figwit received completely overloaded the server at the Halls of Mandos and caused Valinor to go up in flames.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Valinor sank to extinguish the flames and then rose back up again

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Valinor spontaneously combusted.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, so did Perky (because he has been very sick and tired lately) and no one had to worry about being cold

[THE Ka]

Fortunatly, so did Perky (because he has been very sick and tired lately) and no one had to worry about being cold


Unfortunately, as with most pesky germs, they can't help but pass themselves along and entered into Middle Earth on a mission of empathy...

~ Ka

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the germs were destroyed by Orc germs.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the origin of Orc germs were questioned. Were they beast germs, or Elf germs corrupted by Morgoth?

[Eonwe]

Fortunatley, after being threatened by Gandalf with the threat of fire, they fessed up. They were, in fact, Elf germs corrupted to the service of Morgoth. After teh defeat of Morgoth, they became a self-serving race, wandering the land and multiplying at a terrific rate.

[Holbytlass]

Unfortunately, the orc-germs multiplied at a teriffic rate also. It mutated and caused everyone to come down with orc-pox.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Nilp returned just in time to save us all.

Welcome back Nilp!! And Perky as well!!

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately they have yet to save the Quiz Room

(sorry about that, but it hurt so much to see it neglectet. I am sure you will get this thread back on track)

[Eonwe]

My goodness them ork-germs kept this thread down for two days!!!

fortuantely, gandalf spoke a word of Command, and the orc-germs relinquished their hold on teh quiz forum!

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately they spread to every other forum on the downs.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, the Mighty Wight stepped in and stopped it.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, by the Mighty Wight's interference as Gandalf would say "even the very wise can not see all ends." and by interfering in the affairs the orc virus which would have wiped out and killed off a lot of the threads, didn't. Soon it caused the forum to overload from the overpopulating threads and everyone's computer blew up.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, the Mighty Wight is very powerful and could put everything to rights. Or lefts.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, he was too lazy to do anything.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, The Mighty Wizards of Pentdranoop arrived and started to fix things!

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately Gimli wanted to have a little snack and he was feeling hungry for The Mighty Wizards of Pentdranoop that particular day.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, a tree fell down and landed on his head before he could eat them.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately it was a very small tree and the only effect it had was that Gimli from that moment forth, was known as Gimli Bonsai-Helmet.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, a bigger tree fell down on top of Legolas who was standing beside him. Bye bye Captain Obvious. ;) :D :p

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately that Legolas fan girl, (Her name is Mary-Sue.) landed back in Middle-Earth at the very moment the tree fell on Legolas.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, she landed in Mount Doom and was consumed by the flames of the mountain.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Gimli ate The Mighty Wizards of Pentdranoop.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately, Gimli Bonsai-Helmet rememberd to chew them a proper amount of times; resulting in that Gimli Bonsai-Helmet never had to eat again.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Gimli-Bonsai-Helmet had a bad case of indigestion, and the resulting pancreatic emesis melted a hole in Ilúrambar (the Walls of the World, I think). Morgoth re-entered the world!!!

(Sorry, Rune, ability to be online is still too chancy, can't fully re-commit to the Quiz Room yet. Wait 'til November, and we'll be back, precious.)

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately, Morgoth also landed in Mount Doom

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . he was wearing lava-wings.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately, the lava wings were no use as someone had cunningly taped them together.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Gandalf thought Morgoth was and Eagle and decided to ride him.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Morgoth believed he was an eagle, and with Gandalf on his back he went running off a cliff.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, he tore the tape off of the wings and did, in fact, fly.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately, Sauron wasn't much pleased with them disturbing his afternoon nap, so he fried Morgoth with some lightning (Gandalf being immune of course because of his cloak's amazing reflective properties)

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Gandalf wasn't wearing that cloak today.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, this morgoth fellow rather like being zapped now and again my a good bolt of lightning.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, this was not one of those days, and Morgoth fried Sauron for attacking him. He kept Sauron alive, however, since he was happy Sauron was on the right track and using his powers better. Gandalf had also survived since Sauron's power was not all it was made to be.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately Captian Obvious was around to point Gandalf's predicament out to Aragorn and the others

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, he showed up just as you said that.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortuantely, Gandalf was rather annoyed with Captain Obvious, and suddenly a hoard of Lego Lovers bundled on the elf. A satisfied grin spread across Gandalf's features.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the hoard of Lego Lovers only appeared to be Lego Lovers....they were actually a hoard of Ninja Wizards sent by Saruman.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, they were only masgarading as ninja wizards. in reality they were just lego lovers and, asisted by our good friend zack, they built like crazy and got gandalf out of his predicament (whatever that may be...).

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Gandalf didn't want their help and he zapped them into Ninja Wizards.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, Perky had to study for a history exam tonight, and didn't have time to make an unfunny comment.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, Aragorn decided to help Perky resuling in him getting the line of kings all wrong!

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Perky decided that it was better he didn't have tutor and he continued his studies in peace.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, with all the distraction caused by Perky, everyone forgot the real problem....Theoden needed a bed time story before he could go to sleep!

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, that event was fifty years ago and a bedtime story was made. Luckily, it was also good.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, this meant that Théoden had slept through the battle of Pelenor and so the Witch King had not been killed and Minas Tirith fell.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, the ring was still destroyed.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, the ring that was destroyed was Vilya

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Vilya was the One Ring that needed to be destroyed, not Sauron's "One Ring"

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, Gollum knew about this, and saved the true One Ring, Vilya, from destruction without anyone noticing.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately Elrond confessed to Figwit that Vilya was the true One Ring after he was waylaid by Orcs on his way to an Overprotective Fathers convention.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, Figwit was a traitor and told Sauron about this through the palantir he had found in the ruins of Weathertop.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Figwit died a horrible death by the black beast of aghhhhh and nobody thought about him ever again

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, they did think about Johnny the Stinky Balrog.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, Johnny the Stinky Balrog was doing some celebrity reality T-V show (Big Brother: Celebrity Tramps edition) and lost all credibility.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately the show fell through and Johnny came back to M-E

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately, the reality TV show was a big hit in the Undying Lands (can you blame them? I mean... Undying...), so Johnny was called back again.

[Maeggaladiel]

Unfortunately, the show could only be seen on Thursday evenings, which were the Undying Lands' official Bowling Nights.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately Arwen found Vilya.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Arwen turned into a grotesque Gollum looking creature and Aragorn divorced her.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Aragorn had a terrible golfing accident and was blind, thus he took arwen back

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, when they were together they were so discustig to look apon that the people of Minas Tirith cast them forth and they went to live in Mordor.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately Aragorn was able to take Vilya from Arwen.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, all Vilya did was bring the horrid scents to him through conjured winds.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Vilya melted, since it could not take his horrid odour.

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, Morgoth came along and brought Vilya back.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, that crazy guy with yellow boots came around and, with a merry grin, relieved Morgoth of the the weight in his pocket.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, this weight was not Vilya, it was, in fact, a bomb Morgoth planned on using on the free peoples of Middle-Earth.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, this was a good thing.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, the man in big yellow boots was a member of a special tactics bomb squad and disarmed the bomb.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . all the king's bomb experts, and all the king's SWAT
Disarmed Morgoth's bomb ever again.

Wait, something's wrong with that last verse . . .

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, the bomb is made of paper and salt and so doesn’t explode.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, while all this about this salt and paper bomb was going on, the guy in yellow boots made of with teh real vilya.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Morgoth had made off with Mr. Yellow boots' wallet and so he came back.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Fortunately it wasn't Mr Yellow Boot's wallet. It was in fact Morgoths, which Mr Yellow Boots had stolen earlier. Mwahaa!

[Glirdan]

Unfortunately, it was actually Mr.Yellow Boot's wallet disguised as Morgoth's wallet disguised as Mr. Yellow Boot's wallet. (oh no, déja vu! :rolleyes: )

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Mr. Yellow Boots and Morgoth were so confused trying to figure out who's wallet it was and their heads exploded.

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, a passing orc found the one vilya, and Mr. Yellow Boot's wallet, and morgoth's wallet. he made off with all three and set up a society dedicated to the empowerment and freedom of orcs everywhere.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, he fell through a time warp, accidentally killed his dad before he had met his mom, and thus caused a paradox that made the entire time-space continuum implode.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, Eru decided his book(the events that had just happened) would be terrible so he scrapped it.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately his original idea came back, with Unicorns and such, and became a hit thus ruling out any of this pesky ring buisness or fighting

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately, this idear did not sell so he was forced by his publishers too change it back. (with even more fighting and pesky ring buisness)

[Eonwe]

fortunately, after all teh fighting adn pesky ring business was over and done with, gollum ended up with the one ring again. (don't ask me, that's how the book went. :D )

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Eru himself had trouble figuring out how in the heck Gollum got the Ring in his own book, so he gave it to Denethor.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Denethor went crazy and jumped int oMt.Doom, destroying the ring and leaving the Men and the Evil men to fight over the last bottle of Pepto Bismal

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately Eru trying to find a solution to this War has Radagast the Moth fly in and carry off the last Pepto Bismol bottle...this sparks the entire world to raise the question..."how does a 3 ounce Moth carry off a 2 lb bottle of Pepto Bismol?"

[Eonwe]

Fortuneatly, elrond put forth that maybe it was carried on a string by two 3 oz moths.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the Giant Evil Bad Guys That Do Nasty Things Of Doom showed up.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortuneatly, Elrond slayed the Giant Evil Bad Guys That Do Nasty Things Of Doom with the Singing and Dancing Sword of Imladris

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, the singing and dancing sword went crazy with blood-lust and attack the hand that wielded it.

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, Morgoth wielded it.

[THE Ka]

Unfortunately, Morgoth was out of the all too over-looked Band-Aid, and it's fierce friend, Iodine...

~ Aesthete

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, he was killed and his evil left the world and since no one could remember what the trouble had been about, they all went home for tea and biscuits.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately Morgoth's clone, Morgoth II, on Morgoth's death, was released and started causing haddock, i mean, havock once again!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, a giant haddock came and stemmed the havoc.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, Morgoth II corrupted the haddock and steamed the havock... Or is that steamed the haddock? Well, anyway, evil entered ME once again

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, evil was tired of Middle-earth and it moved onto Hogwartz.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, Mr Evil couldn't find Hogwarts. Eru had of course long wiped memory of this "Hogwarts" from the memory of everyone in ME. So Mr Evil returned to serve Morgoth II

[Glirdan]

Fortunately, instead of turning around and walking away, he turned around and walked into a time machine which brought him into the future where he found this Hogwarts that everyone was speaking of.

[Eonwe]

ehem that's Unfortunatley, he found it quite boring. Quite below standars, he thought to himslef.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

So, Fortunately, Mr. Evil thought that he would be good for a change and he destroyed Hogwarts because the small children who were trying to turn him into a newt were rather annoying. Mr. Evil blew it up and returned to the past in his Time Machine and found that Morgoth II was now having tea with Elrond.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, little to Mr. Evil or Morgoth II knowledge, Elrond had laced the tea with Arsenic.

[Holbytlass]

Fortunately, Elrond forgot which cups were laced and chose poorly.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, Elrond's supposed to be one of the good guys, so him being poisoned wasn't the best of news for ME...

[bilbo_baggins]

Fortunately, his sons were still around to say really cheesy council lines and to invite dark rulers over for tea, continuing the heritage.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, a bear ate them.

[bilbo_baggins]

Fortunately, their sister was already married and getting busy, so the Elven breeding rights were secured.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, the Elf blood in Arwen and Aragorn was so weak, they had little chance of bearing an elf.

[Maeggaladiel]

Fortunately, they were both willing to adopt elven children from the nearby orphanage.

[bilbo_baggins]

Unfortunately, ME adoption laws are tedious and require 10 years of waiting.

[ElentariGreenleaf]

Unfortunately, the orphaned elves were really orcs who had recently undergone *expensive* plastic surgery


[EDIT]Opps. Lol. go with bilbo's :D

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, ME adoption laws are tedious and require 10 years of waiting.

Fortunately, elves did not count years and so had no idea of how long 10 years actually was.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, 10 years to them was actually about 100,000 years.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, they had better things to do with their time and so gave the child up.