Fortunately/Unfortunately

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, since it was present times, he was given an iron lung.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the Iron Lung gave him lead poisoining (how strange?) and he died.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Arwen didn't care because she was still married to Haldir.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Eru did care and brought him back to life!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fourtunately, this was a good thing as Frodo now had someone to help him to get to Rivendell.

[WaynetheGoblin]

Unfortunatly he still had the iron lunge so he died again after eru left.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Eru decided to remove the iron lung before he sent him back.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunatly, now he could not breath.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . that didn't matter, because he was now a cyborg made of lembas.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, he got run over by Mount Zoom.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . it was actually the opposite that happened. Mt Zoom was run over by Cyborg Aragorn.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, in the process, Cyborg Aragorn was killed

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, so was Sauron.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Sauron was already dead because Eru ate the Ring.

[Kath]

Fortunately this was not the case as Eru had not yet digested the Ring.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, this also meant that Gandalf didn't turn into the White Wizard.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . that didn't matter, because he ended up marrying Nienna, and she never had to cry again.

(Awww, that's sweet!)

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfourtunately, this meant that her tear ducts burst and she died.

[Orominuialwen]

Forutnately, being a Vala, and therefore not mortal, Nienna couldn't die, so she decided to get herself a late-night snack.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Gimli had sacked Nienna's fridge.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, having a fridge in his sack weighed him down so he was soon caught.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Gilmli was secretly Aule's favorite dwarf, and turned him into a Maia

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Gimli didn't care because he became imortal, unless he took form of a dwarf again.

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately, those dwarf women were just too tempting for the new maia, and he forsook his immortality. (probably had to do with the beards)

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, he slipped, hit his head, and was knocked out cold before he could foolishly do so.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Yavanna did not apreciate his pick up lines, and turned him back into a dwarf

[Gil-Galad]

fortunately she turned him into a 7-foot dwarf with a laser-hand and a guitar as the other

[THE Ka]

Unfortunately, when Gimli tried to host the first ever (and most remembered) maia only performed lazer lights solo rock show, something went terribly wrong and the only disclosings from the significant others was better left said and exposed in a horrific relevation that Gimli had indeed, given up the life of rock and roll for good...

~ Aesthete

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, he came back in twenty years in a spin off where he played his original music in acustics

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the show went bust and everyone hated it.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunatly it was so hated, that it became cult music for a small group of anarchist dwarves, witch took Gimli as there leader.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Gimli was already busy stalking Galadriel.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately the Anarchists stalked Galadriel with Gimli

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly Galadrial landed in a pile of mud, and no one liked her anymore

[Morsul the Dark]

Fortunately Gimli believed the tales of women popping out of the ground and took this as a sign and began flirting with galadriel

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunatly, his opening line was "You look just like my mother in law!"

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Galadriel was turned on by Gimli's deep voice...

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, so was Feanor, and (because he thought Galadriel had the deep voice) he grabbed Galadriel and took her to the vaults of Formenos

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunatly, so was Feanor, and (because he thought Galadriel had the deep voice) he grabbed Galadriel and took her to the vaults of Formenos

Fortunately, Melko had broken them.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Galadriel had an affair with Manwe, and when Varda found out, she cast her into the void with Morgoth!

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Morgoth found her presence shall we say, rather "enlightining". Which wasn't a good thing.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunatly, as Glirdan said, this wasn't a god thing.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, this actually was a God thing, and divine intervention cleared up the whole mess.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Perky went back in time with a spell check machine and negated the last two posts!

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately (but unfortunately for him), he went a little too far back in time and got eaten by a Tyrannosaurus rex.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly (but fortunatly for me) the T-Rex was a carnivore, and therefore didn't eat ents :D

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately Gimli did not care and kept on romansing women with his deep voice!

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, he fell into a bottomless pit.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately the pit did have a bottom and the creater of the pit was acussed of false labelling.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, as soon as Gimli hit the bottom of the floor, the floor gave out and he continued to fall.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, Gimli fell through the center of the earth, and fell out into Numenor

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfourtunately, Numenor was under water and so Gimli drowned.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately it rose back to the surface and Gimli was fine, but he had a Pet Dinosaur named ________ and they went on their merry adventures together

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the pet dinosaur named_________ ate Gimli.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, Gimli cloned himself back in Valinor, so the clone activated

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfourtunately, protesters battered the clone to death.

[Glirdan]

Foutunately, they all got scared away by Gandalf, who was(of course) uncloaked. :eek:

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Perky forgot what exactly was so scary about Gandalf being uncloaked, so all the people came back to lynch the clones!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Foutunately, Tom Bombadill and a Balrog came by and everyone ran after them to find out who they were and if they had wings.

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, the Balrog ate Tom and everyone else.

EDIT: This is my 1000th post! Woo hoo!!

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, the Balrog didn't like the fact that he ate Bombadil, even if his singing was annoying, so, since Bombadil was the first person he ate, he spit everyone out agian.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, most of them were half chewed

[Boromir88]

Fortunately Gothmog (The pink orc) had buddies to hang out with now.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, he too was turned into a Maia, and was whisked off to Valinor, where he read poetry to the Vanyar

[Gil-Galad]

fortunately it was good poetry so Gothmog never bothered anyone again

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Eru became sick of poetry, he said it stirred up too much emotion and expelled Gothmog to Elba and anyone else who dared write/tell poetry.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, he left me in Doriath cause he rather liked my poetry. (if you wonder why I put my name in there, it's because my screename stands for poet, soooo.....)

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, Glirdan was turned into a giant slug and could no longer write poetry.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Glirdan the giant slug could still talk and told Gothmog what to write. Poetry lives!

[wilwarin538]

Unfortunetely, he could talk, but only in slugish, which Gothmog could not understand. Poetry dies! :p

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Gothmog bought a Slug translation book and was able to translate everything I said. Poetry Lives!!! :p

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately Eru smote Glirdan the slug, no more poetry.

[Kath]

Fortunately this was the full and complete end of the matter, as everyone had mroe important things to worry about, such as where Gandalf had got to this time!

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately Gandalf was striking a deal with Sauron to destroy all of Middle-earth.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, they both spontaneously combusted.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Gandalf still had Narya, so the fire didnt' effect him. However, the fire did effect his cloths, and he became uncloaked :eek:

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately Eru thought of the childeren and Smote Gandalf

[Meneltarmacil]

Unfortunately, Gandalf was smite-proof.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, he wasn't smote proof, and so Eru smote him upon the mountain

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, he needed Gandalf to destroy the last Balrog of Morgoth, so he let him live.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Gandalf had to fight the Balrog right at that moment, and in the end Gandalf killed the Balrog but died soon after.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, a Dragon came to the shire and there was no Gandalf to stop it!

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, there were Anti-ballistic Dragon hobbit units to stop it.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, the Dragon was not a ballistic Dragon, so they were powerless to stop it!

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, it turned out to be a firework set off by Merry and Pippin!

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately the firework started a fire, witch burned down all of Hobbiton

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Nienna cared deeply for the Shire, and cried, restoring Hobbiton back to it's time before the fire.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Nienna was the valar who mentored Gandalf, so she send him into the homes of the hobbiton children...UNCLOAKED :eek:

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Gandalf strangely transforms into a frog whenever he uncloaks himself.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Balrogs eat frogs.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, Balrogs also eat hobbit children, so the Balrogs ate the hobbits instead. (Fortunatly :p)

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Sam knocked out all of the Balrog's teeth.

[Kath]

Fortunately Balrog's can eat without teeth.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately the balrog couldn't chew his food properly and started choking on a hobbit leg. (Frodos' Leg that is).

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, when Balrog's choke, they breathe fire, so in the process of choking the Balrog dissolved the leg

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, when he burned the leg, he also burned his throat and he died.

[Hiriel]

Fortunantly, all the other balrogs used his flaming corspe to roast marshmellows.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the all had colds at the time and they burned their marshmellows.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, Gothmog was currently playing in WWJI and his job was the foreman of the marshmellow factory, so there were marshmellows for all the balrogs!

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately Johnny the Stinky Balrog came by so everyone had to leave

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunatly Thingol came by (don't no why) and he "liked" stinky balrogs!

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Dior didn't like the Balrog, and killed him

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately the death *ahem* of Johnny the Stinky Balrog was enlightening to science.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, they still weren't able to find the cure for the common cold.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately they were all elves, and impervious to the effects of the common cold.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Glirdan's poetry caused diseases far worse than the comman cold. (Turning into a slug with Gothmog as your translator never produces good poetry.)

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Eru smote The Elf Warrior down as he said it. Therefor, we never have to hear about me turning into a slug again.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Glirdan's's transition from slug to human left her with some temporary muscle pains.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . there is still hope.

(You figure this one out. :p )

[Lhunardawen]

Unfortunately, nobody was able to figure out what Nilp just said.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . It was only Lhuny-tunes (daga! :p ) who didn't get it. The others who post here would surely understand it.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately Gil-Galad knew, and drew a new map for Middle Earth to make it more interesting

[Kath]

Fortunately, Kath also understood and quickly put false names on Gil's map.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, Eru lost his mind and started smiting everyone, killing the two board users and burning the map to ashes.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately, Morgoth was the most misunderstood character in Tolkien. He didn't do things because he was evil, but because he was just a rebel and wanted to do everything totally opposite of Eru, and he restores the map and the board people.

[Eonwe]

unforetunately, eru doesn't like rebels living in arda, so he banished not only morgoth, but the map and the board users to boot.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, he decided to let Sauron stay. Gandalf after all did need a rival.

For future reference Elf-Warrior, I am a he. And don't worry, there's no hard feelings. ;)

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, the ring fell into Mount Doom by a freak accident, however, and Sauron then died, never to surface again.

[Eonwe]

Foretunately, because that would leave Middle-Earth bereft of a Dark Lord, Galadriel found the ring and replaced him. ( :eek: oh boy...)

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Nilp didn't like the idea of Kath being dead or banished, so he battled this Eru guy and won.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, this was a good thing because it meant that we got Kath back!! YAY Nilp!!!!

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . it meant Nilp replaced Eru as supreme deity. His first act as deity is to bring Sauron back to life.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, Galadriel wasn't two pleased about being usurpted as Dark Lord and (still being armed with teh ring) attacked nilp and his upstart sauron. she was utterly victorious.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Galadriel ended up killing a Nilp-clone (I have lots of those, just ask Menel). The real(?) Nilp got behind Galadriel and sent her to Mary-Sue land.

(Always wanted to do that. http://www.geocities.com/louis_martian/smilies/evil.gif)

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, she enjoyed it there and decided to stay.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, Galadiel didn't mind so much, because after a breif stay in the Halls of Mandos, she was given a new body and returned to business as usually.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, the death of Galadriel drove Nil insane, and he chopped her body up into pieces and hid them under the floorboards of his house. But he kept hearing the beating of her heart. Finally, he went crazy and took his own life!


American Literature strikes again! :smokin:

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, Gandalf was captured by the real Eru(Nlip killed stand-in #1337) and his clothes were fused with his body so he could never be uncloaked again.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, no amount of power could destory Edgar Alen Poe's works, and so the americana still took Nil to his grave.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, that was a good thing in Manwe's book.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, Boromir88 led a fanatical cult of Monks to overthrow Eru and place Nilp back as supreme deity.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, this was a good thing (again) because Nilp liked Glirdy's poetry and he turned him back out of his slug form. YAY Nilp!!! :D

[Boromir88]

Unfortunatly, with their job accomplished, and no skills, or nothing left to do. Boromir and his radical monks annoyed the heck out of Nilp and Glirdan.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, they were the Monty Python monks, and Nil and Glirdan decided they could deel with it so long as the monks kept banging their heads.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately the Monks weren't banging their heads till tomorrow

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Glirdan could wiat. After all, writing poetry takes patience, so he lots of that. As for Nilp....

[The Perky Ent]

...as said, Nil couldn't wait, and in his fiery pain, cast himself into a burning chasm along with the simaril (dont' ask how he got it)

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately this whole thing about Eru being dethroned was one of the Mouth of Sauron's fever dreams.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the Mouth of Sauron doesn't have fever--he has gingivitis.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, he soon had The Mouth of Sauron's Dentist over and he got rid of the nassty gingivitis. Yes he did preciouss.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, there was no cure in Middle Earth for the hickups, and so it was from the one hickup to rule them all that the mouth of sauron died!

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Sauron started speaking through his eye.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, when he was speaking through his eys, he couldn't talk. Then, one day, he tried doing both and he imploded.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, that was for the better good.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately he exploded one day and killed the carpet cleaner.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, the carpet cleaner was an evil orc who didn't do his job so that was also a good thing.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, he also killed Frodo! :eek:

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, it didn't matter, because frodo had teh ring and it was also destroyed. so sauron died with frodo.

[Kath]

Unfortunately this was not the case because when Sauron exploded he, the carpet cleaner, Frodo and the Ring all broke up into tiny tiny pieces which then all came back together in one body so Sauron technically had the Ring.

[Eonwe]

Fortunately, when the carpet cleaner, frodo and the ring combined, something was created that was so powerful that not even sauron could combat it. It (as it was known as) dethrowned Nilp and Glirdan, and banished the annoying monks.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, Nilp, Glirdan and Boro and his monks had a stronger resistance to things that explode then come back together and create new things and thus, they were not overthrown.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, while all this was going on, Gandalf was able to take over Bag End, (as Frodo was no more), so no Sack-vills could get in.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Saruman had taken the old forest first, and Gandalf was stuck with the midgewater marshes :eek:

[Glirdan]

Fourtunatley, Gandalf used the midges to attack Saruman and take over Bag-End.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately the midges felt sorry for Saruman and attacked Gandalf.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, Gandalf was actually Sauron. So Gandalf was safe.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Tom Bombadil was really the mortal disguise for Eru, and he killed all the Maiar living in Middle Earth!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, this meant no more Sauron, so the world was safe!

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, this also meant no Gandalf, Saruman, Radagast, Pallando and Alatar as well.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately no one cared about the 5 Istari. :p

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Jim the Troll did, and went on a rampage, killing thousands.

[Glirdan]

Fourtuately, everyone was visiting Valinor at the time.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, 'everyone' included Jim the Troll.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Bob the Troll hit Jim the Troll over the head with his club.

[Eonwe]

Unfortunately, bill the troll killed bob and went on a rampage to avenge jim's bruised head.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, the sun came up and the trolls all turned to stone.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, because of the position they were frozen in, they were now continuously swearing at Varda, and Manwe got so angry that he blew up half of Middle Earth.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, the half he blew up was mordor and harad. so everyone cool in middle-earth survived, but everyone who was retarted was destroyed.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, Legolas was still there.

[Boromir88]

I like Glirdan's better, so I'll go off that...

Fortunately, Legolas was killed by a rock from the blast.

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately for this thread, there's really no downside to Legolas' death.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, because legolas was gone, there were no rabid legolas fans running loose.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, the Legolas fans went into exile, and formed their own island nation. When they met at the United Nations, they wreaked havoc amongst the representatives!

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, the havoc they caused was just stealing the springs out of the representatives' pens.

[Eonwe]

unfortunately, becuase of teh havoc of having no springs, teh un deided to disband the new country of legolas fans and relocate all of them into mount doom.

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, they fell into the lava pit and thus the world was rid of rabid LEgolas fans.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the world was still full of Viggo fans, and that's worse than Orlando fans.

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately Viggo knew how to survive in the wild woods of Denmark.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the 'wild woods' of Denmark are actually Ents angry at having no fans, so they took Viggo and ate him for supper.

[Lhunardawen]

Fortunately unwashed Viggo was so indigestible, he caused the Ents to throw up.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the Ents's emesis caused the sinking of Europe.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, the Ent's build ships of air long ago, and sailed the skys to Valinor.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, Ossë was in a REALLY bad mood and the waves got so high that it knocked the ships out of the air.

[Eonwe]

fortunately, tulkas (who happens to be the man) was exedingly angry because he never got mentioned in this thread and so he restrained osse and saved the air-ships of the ents.

[Boromir88]

unfortunately, Tulkas was just mentioned last post, so he was happy and didn't restrain Osse.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, the air ships crash landed in Valinor.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, I was lynched when I obviously was innocent, so the people in line got ticked off when I took over WWXII (I'll have to kill Phantom first, of course)

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, before he could kill the phantom, Perky was abducted by space aliens who rearranged his DNA for fun.

[Eonwe]

unfortunately, they dropped a beaker and the perky ent's dna was scrambled, so he emerged from the alien experiment as a freaky monster. and he killed the barrow-wight. :eek:

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, since BW was already dead, it didn't matter.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, BW was not happy about pirky's attempt to kill him, and so he stormed off to Hobbiton and threw a couple of hobbits around.

[Kath]

Fortunately for the Hobbits, the BW 'accidentally' deleted Hookbill from the members list so the post disappeared.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Unfortunately i have pledged my loyalty to Hookbill the Goomba and there for started to beat BW with a wet newspaper!

[Thinlómien]

Fortunately - for the Barrow-Wight - Rune fumbled and hit himself with the wet newspaper.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, I am still banished to the land where hosts of Penguins do battle with Dragons.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately everyone else was banished there, because of the BW's wraith.

[The Perky Ent]

Unfortunatly, Eowyn decided this would be a good a time as ever to kill herself

[Eonwe]

fortunately, there were no rabid eowyn fans to care (i think?).

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, there were. But everyone loves Eowyn so it didn't matter.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Gríma abducted Éowyn and brought her to his underground lair. This started the musical, 'The Wormtongue of the Golden Hall,' which was a hit in hundreds of countries across Western Rhûn.

OK, that was totally random.

[The Perky Ent]

...the majority of Rhûn bought more of Pippin's 'Now, That's what I calleth Music, vol. 1-27', and Eowyn lost her fan base. She was cast into obscurity, and Manwe was so ashamed of her that he killed her on the spot!

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . Grimowyn, her daughter (it should be obvious who the father is), made a film adaptation of the musical, and they were thrust back into the limelight.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, they were only there for three seconds.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, they kept being thrust back in.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately they kept on getting thrusted back in and out again they imploded causing a giant shockwave of death across Middle-earth.

[Gil-Galad]

fortunately everyone was underground so nothing was effected...

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately the shock of the deathwave caused the earth to swallow them up.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, the people of Middle Earth ended up dropping through a plothole where they were saved by Eagles!

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the Eagles had Gandalf, who was uncloaked, again!!!! :eek: :(

[Meneltarmacil]

Fortunately, Gandalf was run over by Mount Zoom.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately Mt. Zoom was only arrested years later.

[THE Ka]

Fortunately, charges of running down the suppositly cloaked un-cloaked were not as great in mordor as in else wheres, since everyone, even the orc-swimcloak models found it rather rude to do such a thing during the national Mt. Doom's Cloak-a-Thon where only the best in cloakery can be displayed in enough lava light.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, Mount Zoom/Doom lost a wheel and everyone was thrown to one side and fell into the lava!

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, they were orcs so it wasn't a bad thing.

[WaynetheGoblin]

Unfortunatly after the orcs went in the lava. Mt. doom or zoom went of a cliff.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Fortunately Mount Zoom was of such dense materials that it landed unhurt at the bottom of the cliffs, bounced once or twice, and in the act of rolling over spilled out the orcs that were stuck in the mire of hardening lava.

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately, the orcs were not made of such strong stuff as the mountain, and were liquified into a gloopy black puddles.

[The Perky Ent]

Fortunatly, they perfered their puddle form, and adapted to their new lifestyle

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the sun evaporated them.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Fortunately, they rose high above the clouds, and became the first of orc expeditions to the moon to be able to say, "A small step for us, a giant step for villianity", and was called into the future to do talk shows, on which they sparkled wittily.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, this caused everyone to forget about Gondor and the wide-spread virus that was going on there, thus cutting off all medical help.

[THE Ka]

Fortunately, the virus belonged to a family of rather sneeky but, weak bacterium that split themselves in two at the sight of the might mold warrior - Penicillium Man! With his taste for runny noses, gregarious wounds and the ever satisfying bacterial hide out bust, he lead the people into a new light of excellent hygene and became the warden of The Houses of Healing...


~ Storybook Ka

[The 1,000 Reader]

Unfortunately, the above was just a fever-induced dream a man of Gondor was having at the moment.

[Eorl of Rohan]

Unfortunately, as Penicilin is not mortal, and therefore never dies, the healing warden continues his position to the day he meets Aragorn, and ignores the request for king's weed as he drones on and on about the power of himself. Eowyn dies.

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately, as Penicilin is not mortal, and therefore never dies, the healing warden continues his position to the day he meets Aragorn, and ignores the request for king's weed as he drones on and on about the power of himself. Eowyn dies.

Fortunately, through Gimli's deductions, Eowyn was only mostly dead. Not all dead. " Mostly dead is slightly alive...all dead....well all dead there's only one thing you can do. Go through her pockets and find loose change." Gimli boasts.

[Kath]

Unfortunately, Eomer walked in halfway through Gimli's boasting so all he heard was, "Go through her pockets and find loose change". Understandably he was not too pleased and did what he had been threatening Gimli with since their first meeting - he cut off his head.

[Thinlómien]

Fortunately, for Gimli's ghost, he chopped of also two of his fingers.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, the ghost of Gimli's two fingers insulted a lot of ghosts and they chased him for a million years.

[Glirdan]

Fourtunately, the ghost fingers got reincarnated.

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately these reincarnated fingers were reborn as Dwarf jewel thieves.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Fortunately, they weren’t very good at it.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, they stole the Ruling Ring from Frodo.

[Kath]

Fortunately because they were bad at it Frodo noticed and took it back.

[Hiriel]

Unfortunately, becuase he took it back, Frodo fell to the power of the Ring. And orcs with slighty effeminate voices and impossibly huge blue-eyes lay waste to the free kingdoms of Middle Earth

[The Elf-warrior]

Fortunately an Orc threw Frodo into Mt. Doom, thus destroying the One Ring.

[Glirdan]

Unfourtunately, the fires were out at the time. Sauron didn't pay his heating bill.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately he paid his Spontaneusly-combusting bill and the fires started up again

[Eonwe]

Unfortunatlely, frodo had already made good his escape, and was living on the lamb with his faithful servant sam, and a band of desparte hobbit outlaws.

[Rune Son of Bjarne]

Fortunately hobbit outlaws, are never too be trusted and on the lamb they slew Frodo and Sam in a most disgusting manner. (this apperently was a good thing)

[The Elf-warrior]

Unfortunately a wolf in sheep's clothing took the Ring.

[Hiriel]

Fortunately, the Ring got caught in the wool as the wolf tried to exticate himself from the itchy costum, and the wolf couldn't find it.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately the Black Beorning found it, ate it, ran into the woods, turned back into Sam, and walked out of the woods

[Eorl of Rohan]

Fortunately, if the one ring could burn Isildur's hand, it could certainly burn the insides of poor black beornings, and it burned a hole right through the beorning and dropped into a mole hole.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Unfortunately, the moles were servants of Sauron.

[Boromir88]

Fortunately the moles were crushed by Mumakil.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . the moles's ghosts (which are bigger than mûmakil) took revenge and crushed the mûmakil. This resulted in an otherworldy inter-species war that spread throughout most of the known world.

[Gil-Galad]

Fortunately the war was over in 3 days

[Boromir88]

Unfortunately those three days were the most destructive in Middle-earth history and everyone was destroyed.

[The 1,000 Reader]

Fortunately, the above statement was only partially true. There were some survivors.

[Gil-Galad]

Unfortunately it was all the bad guys