Crazy Captions

[TomBrady12]

Things went from bad to worse in Gondor when the orcs were informed of Denethor's proposed privatization of Middle Earthian Security accounts.

TB12

[The Saucepan Man]

It was not too long before Denethor began to regret his decision to award the contract for Minas Tirith's exterior lighting to Gothmog & Co.

[Ainaserkewen]

Pippin: I'm sure the army from Mordor can't be that big...

Gandalf: Why don't you look again.

Pippin looks at the slowly loading, pixelated picture before him.

Pippin: It's taking forever.

Gandalf: That is because Mordor is run on a 56k Modem.

Pippin: Stupid dial-up...

OR>>>

Merry: That's a very nice drawing Pip.

Pippin: Thanks, that Palatire has been great inspiration for my art lately.

[elronds_daughter]

Newscaster: ...And Minas Tirith is under attack by the orcs of Mordor. <pause> In other news, the price of pipeweed has gone up, and in a surprise move, Gaffer Gamgee has sold his potato business. <pause> You're watching Shire News 4 at eight. We'll be back, after this.

[Gurthang]

Unknown to attacking Mordor, Minas Tirith has just installed a new deflecter shield. The orcs will soon be taking back their own. :eek:

[elronds_daughter]

Orcs give a whole new meaning to "storming the castle".

[Oddwen]

Men of Gondor: Oh no! We are under siege! SAVE THE SHRUBBERY!!

(You can see a plant on the second level...what's that about?)



Aragond the Gondorian: Hahaha, look at those cheesy explosions! The SFX in this game sure...SPLAT!

[Gil-Galad]

Frodo: all we have to do is wait for Leonard Nimoy and a bunch of Hippie chicks to come save us

:smokin:

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

The fireworks display for the Annual Uruk-Edain Friendship Day went horribly wrong.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Now this is a lesson to all of you. Never play you’re music too loud, the neighbours will get rowdy. So always use you're iCod (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/iCod.bmp)'s head phones. :smokin:

[The Elf-warrior]

One Game to rule them all, One Game to find them, One game to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Much to the dismay of the Gondorians, the Orcian Festivities Committee made a sizable blunder when they published the wrong address on a Orcan shivaree invitation.

[The Only Real Estel]

Gondorians to eachother: "Hey, do you see that light? I'm feeling happy...it's so pretty...I want to touch it...(you fill in the sound effect)"

[Boromir88]

Gondorian: You don't frighten us, Mordor pig dogs. Go and boil your bottoms, you minions of a dark lord. I blow my nose at you, so called "Sauron Lord," you and all your silly Mordor K-naz-ghul. Now go away before I taunt you a second time.

[Gil-Galad]

Gondorian: what are you doing in Gondor?

Orc: none of your business english pig-dog! now go away or we shall taunt you a second time!



*from Plying circus*

We now return to the Golden-Age of Catapulting
(who knew orcs were French...)

[Mithalwen]

This is getting too silly!!!

(But if we built this large wooden badger...)

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Agreed, so lets have a new picture!

http://www.ghostinthemachine.net/witchking.jpg

Witch King: This is my Hour! Darkness shall reign! And I shall be the... AGH! My Swords on fire! Why didn't you tell me?

Gandalf: Sorry, I thought it was you're look.

[Meela]

"Toasties! Man-flesh! Get your battle snacks here! Best in Mordor! Toasties! Man-flesh! Get 'em while they're hot!"

[Hookbill the Goomba]

I just thought of one:

Gandalf Regretted asking the Witch King for a light. (He’ll never smoke again!)

[Mithalwen]

Lord Coe was not convinced that capitalising on the popularity of LOTR would be a winning strategy for the "London 2012" Olympic campaign......

[Gil-Galad]

I go by the name....Tim...


Pippin: oh please...what are you going to do? nibble our bums?

W-K: i'm warning you! look at the bones!

[Oddwen]

Moments later, the Witch-king's Flaming Sword Juggling Upon A Fell Beast act went terribly wrong.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Seconds later, his sword burned away into nothingness, rendering him completely defenseless and rather embarrassed.

[The Saucepan Man]

Gandalf: No matter how fearsome you try to look, you will never break my staff ... oh heck ... now look what you have gone and done! That's really going to hack off the purists ...

[Naz]

The Witch-king decided to add to Denethor's bar-be-que fun by trying out a new technique of his on Gandalf...

Everyone.. I give you.. Gandalf the Lightly Charred. : p

[TomBrady12]

"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to be enslaved."

-The Statue of Disliberty, Mordor, M.E.

[Encaitare]

Gandalf simply smirked to himself and waited, knowing that within a few seconds the fire would heat the Witch-King's metal glove and cook his hand.

[Oddwen]

I can't claim credit for these, having seen them on another site...


"Safety Tip: Do not hold metal objects towards the sky during a thunderstorm."

"Alright, who's next in line to be knighted?"

(From councilofelrond.com)



Frodo: Ah, there's nothing like a good pipe full of weed, even if it's in the darkest depths of Mordor. Sam, do you have a light?

WK: Allow me.

(From me)

[Evisse the Blue]

Another one from thecouncilofelrond.com:
"When the Witchking insisted on cutting the cake at Sauron's wedding, no one dared to object."

And one from me:
WK: I'm sorry but this is the only source of light I can provide - Sauron's doctor prescribed him to avoid bright lights for a while - hence the darkness. Now hurry up and find that lost earring so I can put this off, it's starting to burn my glove.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Due to the recent sitdown strike of the Mordor blacksmiths, the Witch-King was forced to use an unfashioned, fresh-off-the-forge "sword."

[The Saucepan Man]

Witch King: (sings) I am the god of hell fire and I bring you:
Fire, I'll take you to burn.
Fire, I'll take you to learn.
I'll see you burn!

[Gil-Galad]

...The Witch-King really gets mad when he yells at Legolas to stop shooting off his fan club...

[Lalwendë]

The whole class agreed that the new Metalwork teacher was a bit frightening.

[Bywaters]

The Witch King got more than he bargained for when he asked for extra chilli sauce on his kebab. :p

[Maeggaladiel]

"JEES! The one year I'm asked to bear the Mordor Olympic Torch, and the Fell Beast EATS IT! Hopefully nobody notices my clever substitute."

[The Only Real Estel]

Gandalf: "Uh, sure, go ahead and break me. But just so you know, your sword is on fire."

Witch-King: "Yeah right, you think I'm going to fall for that old trick, old man?"

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

When the Witch-King had called the last muffin..............he got annoyed at the Orc who took the last muffin.

[Esgallhugwen]

The mosquitos were rather cruel to the Witch King, so everywhere he went he had to carry a large citranella incense stick with him to ward them off. Of course, it worked for other purposes as well like paralyzing victims with undiluted fear and panic.

[The Only Real Estel]

The new, ultra-hot, sword-shaped M&M's motto 'bursts into flame in your stomach, not in your hand' was apparently not going to work.

[Firefoot]

*What happens when Sauron gets ahold of the Statue of Liberty.*

[Lalwendë]

The Witch King MD: "Mr Sauron, I am a doctor. I assure you that this will not hurt. Now please bend over".

[Nimrodel_9]

Roasted marshmallows anyone? :p

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

The winner of the Grand National......

[Mithalwen]

Too late did the Witch King realise that it had been a mistake to get a sword from teh designer responsible for the Ford Pinto...

[Hookbill the Goomba]

W-K: I demand a new picture!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/eyowinevil.jpg

Eyowin: So it was you who took the last chocolate?

[Mithalwen]

Eowyn was not to happy with her Trinny and Susannah makeover...

or

Faramir "What's the matter, sweetie?"

Eowyn "Nothing, I'm FINE" :p

[Boromir88]

Eowyn the ancient booer: Boo! Boo! Boo! Your true love lives. And you marry another. True Love saved her in the Dead Marshes, and she treated it like garbage. And that's what she is, the Queen of Refuse. So bow down to her if you want, bow to her. Bow to the Queen of Slime, the Queen of Filth, the Queen of Putrescence. Boo. Boo. Rubbish. Filth. Slime. Muck. Boo. Boo. Boo.

[The Saucepan Man]

Witch King: Fool! No living man may hinder me!

Eowyn: I am woman, hear me roar!

[the phantom]

My name is Eowyn. You killed my uncle. Prepare to die.

[Encaitare]

Enraged that the hay ride at the festival left her covered in straw and made her cloak all ragged, she immediately demanded a refund.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Eyowin: How did you become Witch King? I didn't vote for you.

W-K: You don't vote for kings!

Eyowin: Well how did you become it then?

W-K: The Dark lord Sauron held aloft the black sword of flame and signalled that I shall be king of the Witches... That is why!

And you can guess the rest...

[The Only Real Estel]

Losing a hand & having to be knocked out for surgery is bad enough, waking up to find out that they didn't have any more of those cool hooks is just the last straw.

[Bywaters]

Eowyn: Grima said what!!!? Arrgghhhh! ;)

[Anguirel]

Eowyn Wilding Davison (hurling herself before the King's fell beast): Votes...For...Women...

[Ainaserkewen]

Denethor: And the Witch King...comes in the night.

Eowyn: Not tonight he doesn't....come....in the night....Trogdor....

[TomBrady12]

Faramir realizes a bit too late, that it would have been a wise idea to have gotten the pregnant Eowyn the double fudge, cookie chunk, chocoholic icecream she had requested, instead of the healthier razzleberry frozen yogurt.

[The Only Real Estel]

A jealous Eowyn takes her sculpting tool to Arwen's realistic Leaning Tower of Isengard piece.

[Gil-Galad]

Eowyn: told ya i should be Dragon Ball Z!

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Eowyn: "What do you mean 'Hey babe, bring me another brewski?'! Don't ever let me hear you say that again!"

[Oddwen]

In an alternate ending to the Pellenor fields, Eowyn is captured by the armies of Mordor...and forced to use this very giant nail file to give Sauron Lord of Darkness the One Pedicure of Doom!!

[The Elf-warrior]

Flaming sword pic: Witch-King: "Ask not what the Nazgul can do for you. Ask what you can do for the Nazgul!"

[THE Ka]

Though Eowyn was rather confident in this whole ordeal, it seemed to much more dashing to take on the I'm-a-pirate-with-no-hand-and-i've-lost-my-boat look...

E: GAHHH! *Cough

E: I mean... ARRGGG!


~ Reculsive Ka

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

Éowyn: NOT MY PURPLE HAUBERK!!!!!!!!!

[Meela]

That metal corset sure was something else.

Or

Merry knew that sharing his pipe-weed with Eowyn on the ride over was not the best of ideas.

[Evisse the Blue]

Nice pic! :D

A fashion-conscious Eowyn: You call THIS a fancy hauberk??!

[Maeggaladiel]

I am NOT too old for a Night-Night Blankie!! You'll never take it from me!

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Eowyn reveals that she is actually 3-quarters vegetable.

[Esgallhugwen]

Eowyn wasn't about to have the only can of baked beans get the better of her.

"I'll open you yet, you wait and see!"

[Nimrodel_9]

Don't make me POKE you!!!!


http://www.ninecompanions.net/thumbnails/TTTPICS/ents/ttt_ents_3.jpg
Merry: Uh, Pip? Maybe picking Saruman's carrots for dinner wasn't the best idea...

[Meela]

Nobody dared challenge Treebeard's authority when he revealed his champion skills at 9-Orc bowling.

[Boromir88]

The Ents live up to their theme song (http://forum.barrowdowns.com/showpost.php?p=363331&postcount=5) ..."We will, we will ROCK you."

[Oddwen]

Here we see how ancient mythology in Middle-earth differs from our own: our version of Atlas is a man carrying the Earth on his shoulders, whereas M-E...

Or...

Ent: Hey, c'mon you mean old Stone Giants, let me play a little!

[THE Ka]

Ents proved to be valuable to the Agricultural economy by advertising to five-year olds on Saturday mornings that green giants do exist...

~ advice Ka

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Saruman began to wonder if the home decorators he'd hired were legitimate.

[Lalwendë]

Merry was thrilled to find all that pipeweed so he lit his pipe, forgetting that Treebeard had eaten a gallon of baked beans for dinner.

[Gil-Galad]

Never doubt the Ent delivery system...

[Hookbill the Goomba]

TreeBeard gives a whole new meaning to the phase, "Serve up a good meal".

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Help me! My fist has expanded to a ridiculous level!

[Garen LiLorian]

Eowyn pic; Though leading to an ultimately sad ending involving ice sculptures, Aragorn was initially proud of his healing work. 'Behold; Eowyn Scissorhands!'

Ent pic; As Saruman watched the orcish morter team reload, he reflected that perhapse this whole 'technology' kick had gone just a bit too far.

[Lalwendë]

Tongues didn't stop wagging after Treebeard pulled a Maradona at the Fangorn Cup Final.

[Esgallhugwen]

Some nature dude: Ents are highly combustable when combined with beans, just note the flames coming out of this ones rear. Extraordinary!

[Mithalwen]

the true origins of Rugby.....

I am sure many lock forwards must have entish blood....


http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/39737000/jpg/_39737903_lionsjohnson97sa203.jpg

[narfforc]

The Bonfire of The Valar-trees

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Treebeard's computer crashed for the last time! :eek:

[Maeggaladiel]

And Treebeard winds up for the pitch...

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Treebeard just never knew when to quit... even though Saruman had beaten him fair and square in the "Rock, Paper, Scissors" game; Treebeard gave in to his maniacal need to prove to that upstart wizard that "rock" could indeed beat "paper".

[Hookbill the Goomba]

New to Saturday night, “When Trees go bad” *followed by a montage set to rock music*

[Nimrodel_9]

That's a big sandwich!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Trebeard: New picture! Or else!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/Theodeninrain.jpg

Theoden: I still refuse to pay to fix this roof!

[Meela]

Theoden stands dumfounded as the Elves win the Annual Helm's Deep Wet Armour competition yet again.

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Where's the idiot who interpreted Malbeth's cryptic prediction to mean: 'sunny battle weather'...

[Anguirel]

Baldrick explains his stratagem to King Theoden.

"You see sir, the Orcs will believe that this turnip is in fact an army of Elves, if I cut it into really small pieces and carve cross faces and pointy ears on the front..."

"Alas," Theoden mutters grimly. "Now I lack both the old and new counsellors, and must make do with younder mooncalfed clod..."

[The Only Real Estel]

Theoden: "Gamling. Tell the men that the next one that has the brains to light up is going to get a volley in his direction."

[Lalwendë]

Gamling: "With all due respect sire, if you think I'm going down the corner shop in this weather, you're sorely mistaken. Get that niece of yours to fetch your Curly Wurly and ten Benson".

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Theoden saw not only Gandalf the grey uncloaked, but also the whole Orc army. As you can image, he'll need counselling for quite a while. :p

[Encaitare]

The Rohirrim, like the Agents in the Matrix, are renowned for not acknowledging water falling from the sky in various forms.

[Gil-Galad]

Theoden: come on Uruk-Hai...get a nasty cold...come on....

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Theoden and Gamling react to yet another "Gandalf The Grey uncloaked" joke.
(just kidding Hookbill :D )

[Oddwen]

Gamling: Cheer up! At least it's not hailing, right?

Or...

Theoden: Give them the valley.
Gamling: Sire?
Theoden: Oops, did I say that out loud? I meant "A Volley".

[The Elf-warrior]

Theoden: "Look, see that Orc there on that hillock without a helmet? There's one Orc as stupid as we are, not wearing a helmet in the rain."

[Esgallhugwen]

The battle was doomed, after all, Theoden couldn't stand the smell of wet dog.

or

Theoden: Gentlemen, lend me your shields so that I may make a marvelous canopy only for me and my protection.

[Boromir88]

*Theoden spots the large Uruk-hai horde*
Theoden: Gamling...I think you better cancel the Tea and Crumpets Society meeting tonight.

[Nimrodel_9]

Gamling: Not to be a pessimist, my lord, but I don't think this "Stand-Under-a-Sprinkler-to-Look-Menacing" plan won't work. :p

[Gurthang]

Theoden sighs. He just realized that his new perm is ruined.

[Lhunardawen]

Theoden and Gamling froze, with the stark realization that in a few minutes... they'll begin to melt.

[Nilpaurion Felagund]

. . . and the Orcs are holding a swimsuit competition before Helm's Deep.

[Ainaserkewen]

Theoden: (Thinking) I'm forgetting something...yes, what was it? I turned off the all the lights, locked the doors, watered the flowers...Oh Bollocks I forgot to feed the Cat...

And on two side notes: 1) Nilpaurion Felagund, ew...*smiles*
and 2) Whenever I watched the movie all I got from Theoden's expression was "Oh crap..."

[Fingolfin II]

PJ decided to have Arwen come to Helm's Deep after all. And she was wearing a white cloak.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Theoden looking at the Orc Army: I think we'll need some more plates and knives. And Bilbo thought 13 Dwarves were difficult to cater for! :o

[Estelyn Telcontar]

Gamling: Hailing frequencies are open, my lord.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Gamling: Hailing frequencies are open, my lord.

Théoden: Oh, Shut up Gamling. That wasn't funny three minuets ago; it’s not funny now! :p

[Boromir88]

Theoden and The Uruk-hai chieftain agree to settle the dispute the old fashioned way....a staring contest!

[Bywaters]

Theoden: Damn rain... my joints have seized up. :(

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Theoden: Agh! A new picture please! this rain is rustin' me arms up!

http://www.elobelisco.net/CINE/JPG/Boromir.jpg

Boromir's secret Alcohol addiction was getting out of hand at Amon Hen.


_

[Lalwendë]

Sean could blow his horn all he liked, but Joely Richardson wasn't going to turn up in this woodland.

[Mithalwen]

Theoden "Gissa job, go on giss us one"

Boromir 1, The statue was the best audience Boromir would ever get for his rendition of "ein HeldenLeben" - normally he had ot hope for people who were merely stone-deaf...

Boromir 2, Boromir was just about to wind his horn when he was horrified to discover one of those pesky hobbits had switched his sword for a rolled up newspaper

[Meela]

After summoning a broken stone statue, a pesky butterfly and a confused retired hunting hound, Boromir was just about ready to give up on that Army of the West.

[TomBrady12]

Sean Bean needed a few sips of the strong stuff before accepting his next role in National Treasure

TB12

[Anguirel]

Boromir was inconsolable when his pet Oliphaunt "Tiny" died. He kept one of its tusks and kissed it in moments of stress.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Too distracted by his horn blowing, Boromir failed to notice the stone man who was fast making off with his wallet!

[The Only Real Estel]

Theoden: "Great. So I got the whole country all freaked out, mustered what men I could, traveled the dangerous path to Helm's Deep, and induced an army of elves to come all the way from Lothlorien to fight an army of 10,000 Uruk-Hais...that are armed with waterguns. Elrond will not be pleased."

[Boromir88]

Boromir: None shall pass.

And well know the rest... :p

[Angmar]

Boromir: "Curses! Foiled again - the toy shop promised that the bubble-horn would work this time!"


-alternate-

Boromir : "Those hobbits.. so darn proud of their little pipes.. let's see them top the size of [I]this one!"

-appendix to alternate-

Boromir: "Heh.. heheh.. mine's so much bigger than theirs.."

[The Only Real Estel]

Surrounded by logos and panicky, Boromir was forced to blow his horn for help.

[Holbytlass]

Little boy blue come blow your horn...
sheeps in the meadow, hobbits in corn

[The Elf-warrior]

Boromir tried with no success to wake up the statue by blowing his horn.

[Ainaserkewen]

Boromir: "Heh.. heheh.. mine's so much bigger than theirs.."

Stone Statue: Because that's soo much better there, mister size 8 feet.

[Lalwendë]

Boromir grimaces as he mistakenly puts Denethor's ear trumpet to his lips.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Boromir: That folks, was my rendition of "You're The Inspiration". I wanna thank you all for coming on out tonight and seeing me. And now I'll just keep this mood flowing with my next selection entitled..."This Magic Moment."

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Boromir calls for aid after somehow stabbing himself in the arm...

[Oddwen]

Gamling: Hail, Theoden King!
Theoden: What's this, another Hail-storm?

(Thanks to www.stupidring.com...)

Da Boromir pic...


Boromir stands waiting in anticipation for his solo...

Or...

Boromir: Go ahead, I dare you to insult my playing.

Or...

As the Uruk-hai drew closer, Boromir silently cursed himself and wished that he had kept up on his music lessons as a youngster.

[THE Ka]

Boromir pic:

The last of the confused Oliphaunt hunters...


~ ;) Ka

[Boromir88]

Boromir blows his horn to introduce the new picture...

http://www.ninecompanions.net/thumbnails/fotrpics/elrond/fotr_elrond_rivendell_36.JPG
Elrond had caught word that the Fellowship finally made it to Mount Doom, but also found out they didn't take the ring with them!

[Angmar]

Only Advil's advanced pain-relieving formula is able to cure one of those Eldar-headaches.

~or~

Elrond silently promises himself that never, ever again will he take Boromir to a mexican restaurant before a council meeting, even if he does promise to pay.
Nothing was worth this assault on his senses.

[Fingolfin II]

Elrond is a master of healing, but when he found out that Merry had swallowed the Ring it all became too much for him.

[Gil-Galad]

Elrond is having a headache as Mr.Anderson keeps trying to take the Ring, beleiving that it is the key to the matrix

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Elrond: Well pardon me for breathing, which I don't do anyway, so I don't know why I mentioned it.... Oh Eru, I'm so depressed!

OR

Elrond: For the last time! I'm not agent Smith!

[Bywaters]

Elrond desperately tries to remember where he put his keys

or

Elrond: ...98, 99, 100, coming, ready or not!

[Anguirel]

Elrond watches the "Arrrwen is dying" scene in ROTK...

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

After all these years of being a host, Elrond still clumsily walks in on his guests when they're taking a shower.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Elrond: "Oh Eru, not another birthday that ends in a "0"...

[Lalwendë]

Elrond: "Maybe if I press them down for long enough, my eyebrows will eventually look more level."

[Meela]

"Eyebrow shaping glue... strong stuff.... *tuuuuug*.... hand stuck.... helllllp!"

[The Saucepan Man]

Elrond: If I hear "Tra-la-la-lally, here down in the valley" one more time ...

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

"Go easy on the miruvor, buddy."

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Elrond: Please! No more Gandalf the grey uncloaked jokes!

Gandalf: Awww...

[Mithalwen]

"Why do all these people have to come to my house? Why can't they naff off and annoy Cirdan for a change?"

[Anguirel]

I wanted to rep you for that, Mithalwen, but I think I must have repped you in the Fortunately thread. I've often wondered why they didn't "naff off and annoy Cirdan for a change"...

ELROND: Eru! If Celebrian's divorce lawyer keeps charging these positively Valinorean alimonies I'll have to sell my country place and move to a cottage in Lindon...

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Elrond: New picture, please! PLEASE!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/Elrondp.jpg

Elrond and Gandalf saw Saruman the White uncloaked!!!!

Gandalf: Its disgusting!

[Anguirel]

Elrond and Gandalf start to regret taking Denethor's advice about how to defeat Sauron. "Throw yourselves onto a pyre and it'll all be alright!"

[Mithalwen]

Gandalf: "But he is the heir to Gondor and Arnor, your foster son and through many fathers your great nephew..."

Elrond : "I don't care, Gandalf - He's after my daughter and that makes him a scruffy oik who needs a shave, a decent suit and a hair-cut - and a proper job ....."

[Angmar]

Elrond: [gasp] "The leaves.. they are attacking!"

Gandalf: Have no fear. Board the windows, and ready the torches! They shall not get the Ring!


~or~

Elrond [whispering]: "Gandalf.. pssst.. 'casual Fridays' doesn't mean you don't have to wear pants. Please, before anyone sees."

Gandalf: [deranged chuckling] "Heh.. you said 'pants'.."

[Kath]

Gandalf: It's just not fair. If Frodo wasn't a hobbit I could have beaten that lost puppy dog look out of him by now but no, that would be unfair because I'm three times his size - darn vertically challenged people!

Elrond: I know - but just look at those eyes *falls in love*.

[Maeggaladiel]

E: Oh come on. It's not that bad. I'll do it tomorrow.
G: For crying out loud, NO! The guacamole has sprouted leaves! Clean out your refrigerator NOW, man!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Elrond: What do you think of my new play? I call it; "thick George Clots sits in the stocks and gets pelted by rancid Tomatoes". I got our own Aragorn to play the title role.

Gandalf: i think I'm going to be sick!

[Formendacil]

Gandalf and Elrond discover to their disgust that the ideas of what makes a fun activity have changed greatly since they last heard from Tol Eressia.

[Nimrodel_9]

Elrond somehow super glues his hand to his forehead. :p

Elrond and Gandy pic:
Both: What in the world is that hobbit doing??!! :eek:

[THE Ka]

Elrond and Gandalf decide to catch up on news, and the latest gossip...

E: I don't get it! I take this kid into my life, house and care and now he wants my daughter! I mean, come on!

Gandalf dozes off at the notorious 'blah, blah bla blah...'
Wakes up...
G: ... So, have you seen Gloria Estefan's new hair?

E: Stands in utter confusion...

~ Ellen Degeneres Ka

[Oddwen]

Elrond: Have you ever just stood and stared at it, Gandalf? Marvelled at its beauty, its genius? Billions of people, living out their lives...oblivious...

Or...

Elrond: Eru, Gandalf! Who waxed your eyebrows??
Gandalf: And was it the same person who macraméed your hair?!?
*both turn their deadly glares upon Pippin*

[The Saucepan Man]

Elves: (offscreen) Tra-la-la-lally! Here down in the valley!

Elrond: I'm telling you. They do it every time someone arrives. It's doing my head in.

Gandalf: Would you like me to fireball them?

[Gil-Galad]

Elrond: there is no one here now go away

*Elrond turning to Gandalf*: give'm the animals

Gandalf: what!

Elrond: give'm the animals!

*catapult launches cow, you know the story*

[Ainaserkewen]

Elrond: Are you kidding? Nay, it is a midday tradition.

Gandalf: I was right! You see? This is what happens when you mingle human blood in, it takes away all Elven decency and shame...

Elrond: 'Round here we just call it an imbalance.

Gandalf: ...And in broad daylight too!

[Bywaters]

Elrond and Gandalf look on unimpressed as Gimili awakens after another drinking competiton with Legolas.

[Lalwendë]

Elrond and Gandalf couldn't even stand to look each other in the eye after another heated Balrog Wings argument.

[Anguirel]

I wonder which sides they took...

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Trying to get the One Ring in a peaceful fashion, Sauron attempts to bribe E & G by performing a sultry exotic dance.

[Nimrodel_9]

Gandalf: Elrond, this is the last time I will attempt to help you with your problem!
Elrond: But... but...
Gandalf: No buts! Don't even ask me to help get rid of Aragorn again! Arwen can look out for herself!
Elrond: *whines* But I don't like him!
Gandalf: Shh! He might here us! *both peek around pillars* Gah! He's still there! And I don't think he's putting that ferret down any time soon!

or

Gimli shaved.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Gandalf: " I really don't see how you could blame me for this..."
Elrond: "They're your friends...you are responsible in large part for why they are here!"
Gandalf: "I have never ever even hinted to Pippen that painting "Pippen was here--3018" on the garden wall would be acceptable.
Elrond: "What are you anyway...flypaper for freaks!"

[Oddwen]

To the annoyance of the entire Fellowship, Boromir would wake them bright and early with Reville.

Or...

"I will not go forth like a thief in the night," exclaimed Boromir setting his horn to his lips, and blowing forth an embarassing squeak.

[elronds_daughter]

Elrond: "Think it'll work?"
Gandalf: "It would take a miracle."

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Less than impressed with Arwen's new punk image.

[The Only Real Estel]

Elrond: "You stole Glorifindel's horse & saved Frodo instead!?"
Gandalf: "What got into? You don't have creative license, you know."

[Nimrodel_9]

Gandalf: Are you sure they're still impressed with this pic?

http://www.ninecompanions.net/thumbnails/fotrpics/grouphobbits/fotr_merrypippin_shire_4.JPG
Merry: Whoa! Gandy really wanted that cake!!!

[The Only Real Estel]

Gandalf/Elrond pic:

Elrond: "Figwit! How many times do I have to tell you to stop filling the elven children's heads with silly nonsense about wargs? For the last times, they're basically wolves, not a cross between hyenas, lemmings, & warthogs!!!"

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Merry: Maybe smoking a GIANT pipe was not such a good idea.

Pippin: What? Oooh! Whaa!

[Bywaters]

Merry and Pippin audition for the Black and White Minstrels

[Lalwendë]

Pippin: "I'm not going to visit Lalwende and davem any more, just look how smoky their house is."

[Anguirel]

One of Saruman's hobbit torturing fantasies.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Merry and Pippin wondered why their dates had stormed off without saying 'Hello'.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Pippen: "Wow, Miss Diamond makes a mean chili...I bet she'll win the cook-off contest!"
Merry: "Yeah, I'm still feeling the burn!"

[The Only Real Estel]

It was a tough lesson, but well learnerd: Never light up the 'ol pipe close to a cow.

[Meela]

Merry: Pip, are you sure those were candles you put on Bilbo's cake?

Pippin: Candles... they're the same thing as firecrackers, right?

[Angmar]

"When makeup artists strike back"




[loving the "cow" post - true, true]

[Nimrodel_9]

Chim, chiminey
Chim, chiminey
Chim chim char-ee!
A sweep is as lucky
As lucky can be! ......... :p :D

[Sophia the Thunder Mistress]

The art of hobbit-stealth involves liberal use of black paint to camoflauge the face along with their trademark silent movements.

The art of the hobbit 'fro is altogether different and much more difficult to master.

[THE Ka]

Pippin and Merry try out for BraveHeart....


~ ;) Ka

[The Only Real Estel]

(Talking Offscreen) Gandalf: Here, pass this around, it's the mirvor, the cordial of Imladris. One small sip is enough to keep a grown man on his feet for a full day. Hmm...seems to be lighter than it was earlier..."

Merry (whispering): "How many gulps did you have, Pip?"

Pippin: "Four."

[Gurthang]

Merry and Pippin learned about electricity when they stuck keys into a light socket. Needless to say, Pippin's head, which had a positive charge, was violently drawn into Merry's negative head. They were both knocked senseless.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Merry and Pippin decide to start a Mars Volta covers band.

[Mithalwen]

Merry and Pippin had a blast at Galstonbury - despite the mud it had everything a hobbit could wish for - low level accommodation, music, dancing, lots to eat and drink and some really interesting pipeweed

[Nimrodel_9]

Nope, that wasn't the right wire!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Pippin: I think this pic has sufficiently blown up in our faces.
Merry: So here’s a new one!

http://www.warofthering.net/quintessential/torn_lutzimages/4329_cls.jpg

Gandalf: Damnation! I dropped my keys!

[Angmar]

Legolas: And further on down, you can see as the strata....
Bucket: I HAVE NO LEGS!

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Legolas: Don't you think you over reacted?

Gandalf: Of course not! He was being a fool of a Took!

[Firefoot]

Gandalf: There they are! The drums in the deep!

Legolas: ...? But that's a marching band.

[Mithalwen]

legolas : when the agent said indoor plumbing this isn't quite what I expected....

[Esgallhugwen]

Gandalf: It's down there.
Gimli: *gulp* down there?
Gandalf: Yep
Gimli: Very dangerous, you go first *motions to Legolas*
Legolas: I hate snakes.

or

Gandalf: And you just hold the torch over like so *lights on fire*
Legolas: wow how'd you do that?
Gandalf: Balrog farts.
*Gimli leans over*
Gandalf: I wouldn't do that Gimli son of Gloin
Gimli: oh and why not? *beard catches on fire*

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

The Quest takes an unexpected turn as Frodo turns into an ant.

[wilwarin538]

Leggy: My God , he's climbing.

[Nimrodel_9]

Legolas: Uhhh...
Gandalf: When I told him to throw himself in next time I didn't really mean it...

[Lalwendë]

Gandalf: "I think this is where I lost my contact lens. Legolas, do your elf eyes see it?"

[wilwarin538]

Gandalf: I agree, I think this will be a perfect place for us to bungee jump.

[Formendacil]

Behind the scenes of the Gondolin movie:

Director(andalf):"And this, Glorfindel, is where you fall to your death taking the Balrog with you. We'll have to do it in one take, because you won't be around for another couple thousand years for us to do another."

Glorfindel(egolas): "I don't remember signing my life away for this movie! Why don't YOU play the Balrog-killer who gets killed?"

Director(andalf): "I did that last time. It's your turn."

[Gil-Galad]

Legolas Singing: 7 fellowship along the wall, 7 fellowship along the wall, you push one down *Sam screams* 6 fellowship along the wall left!

Gandalf: stop doing that!

[The Elf-warrior]

Only Legolas could see the drums in the deep.

[Oddwen]

Only Legolas could see the drums in the deep. (The Elf-warrior)

Leggy: Hmm, Pearl Custom...possibly a Tama snare...14 inch...nope, a fifteen inch snare...and are those Titanium Zildjian cymbals???

Gandalf: He's babbling again.

Boromir: Want me to whomp him?

[Lhunardawen]

Ditch the mortals!

[Lalwendë]

Middle Earth construction workers were often distracted by the sight of Arwen:

Gimli: "Over 'ere darlin!"
Legolas: "Cor, look at them ears!"
Gandalf: "Give us a wiggle love!"

[Anguirel]

Gimli: This ladder is marginalising me. Where's my axe?

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Upon losing Frodo to the abyss, Gandalf wished he had taken Legolas' warnings about casually throwing away his banana peel a bit more seriously.

[wilwarin538]

Legolas: Is that a new picture I see down there?

http://www.elwing.org/~michaela/images/library/gandalf_the_white.jpg


Gandalf: I said it was MY sandwich. Get your own.


(this my first time posting a pic, hope it works ok)

[Gil-Galad]

Gandalf: you have been vanguished Orc!

Orc: no i haven't

gandalf: what! your arm is off!

Orc: no its not

Gandalf: then whats that*points to severed arm*

Orc: i've had worst

Gandalf: no you haven't!

[Nimrodel_9]

I WILL get that fly!!!!

[Healing_Heart]

Steal my bleach! Gaahhh!!!

[Meela]

Another Orc dared to laugh at Gandalf's unfortunate dye job.

Gandalf: I tell you, it's Sunkissed Blonde! *thwack*

[wilwarin538]

Gandalf thinking: I guess I wont be able to hide by blending in.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Gandalf's dilemma: Dose he go to the battle to save Middle Earth? Or to the ice cream van that has just turned the corner?

It’s an impossible choice!

[Gil-Galad]

Gandalf being uncloaked sparked a war lateer to be named, The War of the Cloak...which was more everyone versus Gandalf...

[Formendacil]

As he whirls around in battle, Gandalf the White catches sight of someone who almost certainly should not be there: Gandalf the Grey.

[luthien-elvenprincess]

Coach Gandalf demonstrates the finer points of batting to his Middle Earth
Pee-Wee baseball team.

[dancing spawn of ungoliant]

Gandalf: Dang it! I'll show those Gondorians that I can use a sword. Pointy end goes into the other man. And that's it.

[wilwarin538]

Gandalf gets slightly angered(word?) at the sight of all the uncloaked Gandalf jokes on this thread.

[THE Ka]

As a child on the playground, Gandalf was oddly left out of the Wars of The MudPies...

G: Okay, okay! I promise not to knock you out because your dirty my cloak! Please... Fine! I'll come tomorrow in grey! How about that?


~ Ka in pajamas Ka

[Hookbill the Goomba]

Gandalf: New pic! Or Else!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/handsup.jpg

Aragorn: Hands up all who think I should be King!

[wilwarin538]

(Hookbill's continued)

Aragorn: Hands up all who think Gimli will lose at the drinking game with Legolas.

[Gil-Galad]

Theoden: hands up if you were picked...Gamling sit down, everyone knows you always put your hand up during Thumbs Up 7-Up

[Firefoot]

Aragorn: Now on the count of three, everyone throw your mugs at Gríma.

[Oddwen]

The Men: "To Business!"

[Tymezennith]

"Give us Chocolate or give us.... um.... Cheese! Yeah!

"Let's have a statue contest. whoever can stand this way the longest gets a shiny... something"

:rolleyes:

"Yeah yeah, I know the roof has a couple leaks, but this is outrageous!"

[Gil-Galad]

Gandalf Pic

Gandalf: what the... i killed you already Witch-King! you should be dead by now why aren't you dead!

[Fingolfin II]

Arwen and Eowyn decided to end their jealousies by going to the men of Edoras to vote for them.

[Formendacil]

This scene followed immediately after Aragorn's induction into the Cool Rohirrim Club. His first motion was as follows:

"All those in favour of kicking Grima out of the Cool Rohirrim club, raise their hands!"

All: "AYE!!!"

[Gurthang]

"Bingo!" :D

AND

Gamling and the man behind him gasp for air after Aragorn cut the cheese! :eek:

[THE Ka]

R&A: spam! Spam! SPam! SPAm! SPAM!

rohan woman: Oh, shutup!!!



~ Ka
:D Oh joy, what fun with salted meats from a can...

[Meela]

The men support Theoden's number with backing vocals at the Wild Stallion Inn's kareoke competition.

[Gil-Galad]

Everyone: Bingo!

Theoden: *darn* our one digit system...



*I would like to know who keeps giving me bad reps with no explanation at all! and with no intials to say who wrote it! just tell me what i'm doing wrong okay! seesh!*

[Angmar]

All of Rohirrim was never reticent to ask for refills when the ale-cart made its next round. Aragorn felt a moment of caution, being a little tipsy already, but hey - "when in Rome," he thought, as he also raised his mug aloft.
Seconds later, he was on the floor, and everyone else was laughing.

[Lalwendë]

Gimli's table manners had set a precedent in Meduseld. Soon afterwards, the inaugural All Edoras Eructation Contest was held, in which Gamling was one of the keenest competitors.

[Hookbill the Goomba]

The old woman behind Gamling spotted his bald spot! :eek:

[The Only Real Estel]

Aragorn: “Take what you can!”

Gamling: “Give nothing back!”

[Encaitare]

Theoden Giry: Keep your hand at the level of your eyes!
Rohirrim: Righty-o, boss.
Theoden Giry: Ehh... I guess way up in the air will do.

[Eomer of the Rohirrim]

Spot the man who's not fond of Rohan beer....

[Holbytlass]

A hundred bottles of beer on the wall, yeh take 'em down and pass 'em around....

[Hookbill the Goomba]

All: A toast to the new picture!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v604/hukbillgoomba/agh.jpg

Saruman: AAAGH! ORCS!

[Meela]

Saruman: Hockety pockety wockety wack, abracabra dabra nack. Shrink in size ery small, we've got to save enough room for all. Higitus Figitus migitus mum, pres-ti-dig-i-ton-i-um!

[wilwarin538]

Saruman: Come back with my poodle!!!

[Kath]

Saruman: Aaaaaaaa - choo!

[Ainaserkewen]

Sauron watching the live broadcast of Saruman's motivational speeches.

Sauron: Man, that's evil.

[Nimrodel_9]

Drinking pic:
Belching Contest in the Golden Hall
Does everyone have root beer? Right! Let's get this thing started!

Saruman pic:
Ahh! Blasted dog! Look at what you've done! :p

[Gil-Galad]

Saruman:Now go away or i shall taunt you a second time!